Winning Commonwealth Games gold in Glasgow in 2014 was "the best and worst thing that ever happened to me", says Scottish swimmer Ross Murdoch.
Murdoch, then 20, edged out Olympic silver medallist and local favourite Michael Jamieson to claim the 200m breaststroke title at Tollcross.
Since then he has struggled to reach those heights because of injury, poor form, and mental health issues.
"I thought about trying to find a new identity," he told BBC Scotland.
"I went through a phase where I thought I might retire. Go back to uni, finish my degree, and just move on.
"But I got past the Commonwealth Games and European Championships last year and I still feel like I've got something more to give."
Murdoch claimed two European golds in 2016, but endured a disappointing Rio Olympics before bouncing back with a Commonwealth silver in Australia last year.
And while he is hesitant to look to far ahead, a revived Murdoch is now committing himself to another Olympic cycle and the 2020 Games in Tokyo.
"I don't really want to let 2014 define me," he said. "It was probably the best and worst thing that ever happened to me.
"Not that I got complacent after it but it did come when I wanted it to - if I wanted to win a medal, I'd win a medal. If I wanted to win the race, I'd win the race.
"Off the back of that, when things don't go your way and you get sick and injured, those things really do take their toll.
"I'm 25 now. I don't have to strive for greatness every day. If I can just be good every day and do the little things right, that'll add up to something big in the end."