American model Chrissy Teigen has described the pain of losing her baby earlier this month.
At the time Teigen shared photos on Instagram of herself crying in hospital after learning that the baby boy she had been carrying was stillborn.
The photos - taken by her husband, singer John Legend - were praised by many, but also criticised by some.
In a blog post Teigen addressed her critics: "I cannot express how little I care that you hate the photos."
Teigen, a model, TV personality and cookbook author, has two children with singer Legend. In mid-August they were revealed they were expecting a third.
In her Instagram post at the time, Teigen revealed that they had named the baby Jack.
In the Medium post, she writes that she asked her mum and husband to take photos of the moment, "no matter how uncomfortable it was".
"I explained to a very hesitant John that I needed them, and that I did NOT want to have to ever ask," she says.
"He hated it. I could tell. It didn't make sense to him at the time. But I knew I needed to know of this moment forever, the same way I needed to remember us kissing at the end of the aisle, the same way I needed to remember our tears of joy after [children] Luna and Miles. And I absolutely knew I needed to share this story."
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We are shocked and in the kind of deep pain you only hear about, the kind of pain we’ve never felt before. We were never able to stop the bleeding and give our baby the fluids he needed, despite bags and bags of blood transfusions. It just wasn’t enough. . . We never decide on our babies’ names until the last possible moment after they’re born, just before we leave the hospital. But we, for some reason, had started to call this little guy in my belly Jack. So he will always be Jack to us. Jack worked so hard to be a part of our little family, and he will be, forever. . . To our Jack - I’m so sorry that the first few moments of your life were met with so many complications, that we couldn’t give you the home you needed to survive. We will always love you. . . Thank you to everyone who has been sending us positive energy, thoughts and prayers. We feel all of your love and truly appreciate you. . . We are so grateful for the life we have, for our wonderful babies Luna and Miles, for all the amazing things we’ve been able to experience. But everyday can’t be full of sunshine. On this darkest of days, we will grieve, we will cry our eyes out. But we will hug and love each other harder and get through it.
She also directly addresses criticism she received at the time for sharing photos of the moment on Instagram.
"I cannot express how little I care that you hate the photos," she writes. "How little I care that it's something you wouldn't have done. I lived it, I chose to do it, and more than anything, these photos aren't for anyone but the people who have lived this or are curious enough to wonder what something like this is like.
"These photos are only for the people who need them," she adds. "The thoughts of others do not matter to me."
Facts about pregnancy loss
- In the UK, one in four pregnancies ends in miscarriage - with most happening early (before 12 weeks)
- Miscarriage is the loss of a pregnancy during the first 23 weeks
- About one in 250 births is a stillbirth, when a baby is born dead after 24 weeks
- There are 250,000 miscarriages and 3,000 stillbirths every year in the UK, according to the charity Tommy's
Teigen, who is also a TV presenter, had been documenting her pregnancy on social media.
She was taken to hospital on 27 September with excessive bleeding, but had reassured fans she and the baby were healthy.
In the later Instagram post, however, she revealed that "we were never able to stop the bleeding and give our baby the fluids he needed".
Teigen then thanked her followers for their "positive energy, thoughts and prayers" and expressed gratitude for the "amazing" life she enjoyed with her family.
"But every day can't be full of sunshine," she continued. "On this darkest of days, we will grieve, we will cry our eyes out. But we will hug and love each other harder and get through it."
Legend, 41, is a multiple Grammy-winning artist whose 2013 track All of Me - a song he dedicated to his wife - spent 92 weeks in the UK singles chart.
His parallel careers in film, music and TV work have seen him become an EGOT - one of only 16 people who've won a competitive Emmy, Grammy, Oscar and Tony award.