The person I miss most is me

Husband, father, businessman, biker, Alzheimer's

"Our story is not finished yet. We do know how it will end and it will not be a happy ending. We know how precious time is and the clock is ticking."

To their friends Chris and Jayne Roberts were known as the 'golden couple'.

They had a lifestyle many only dream of - happy marriage, big family, great home, busy, successful businesses and adventurous hobbies.

Then five years ago at the age of just 50 things changed.

Chris was diagnosed with mixed dementia - vascular damage and Alzheimer's.

The couple have thrown themselves into raising awareness of the disease.

For the last 18 months the Roberts have opened up their lives and those of their family to cameras for the BBC's Panorama programme.

Using CCTV and video diaries they provide a rare and intimate insight into a family adapting to dementia.

They want it to help others.

Living With Dementia: Chris’s story

Chris has volunteered to be tested every six months as part of a research project to assess how well he is living with dementia.

"When you get given a diagnosis the only thing you can cling to is a little bit of hope and research gives you that hope," he says.

Life goes on despite dementia but increasingly Chris is on a short fuse.

He says he can get cross and angry which was until recently completely out of character.

Chris and Jayne met through their shared passion for motorbikes and married 21 years ago.

They have two children together as well as three others from previous relationships.

The couple, who live in Rhuddlan, north Wales, run a property maintenance business.

Chris also used to run a custom motorcycle build and repair shop.

He has had to give that up along with his beloved motorbikes. He can no longer drive.

Life has changed wholesale.

Nothing is 'normal' anymore. Including night time.

But the curtains across the front door are doing their job.

The cameras capture the impact on family life behind closed doors as things become more confusing for Chris.

"That element of me is becoming less, it's definitely becoming less and less," he says.

"I'm becoming a new me which I don't particularly like.

"The person I miss most is me."

Today Chris is leaving the family home for a day's respite.

One of the first things he did after diagnosis was to choose his own care home.

But just like night time, mornings are often a challenge for him.

Chris is looking forward to having 'a day off'.

He has been going on occasional day visits to the home for seven months.

Jayne has a few days off. Their daughter Kate, now 18, is looking after her dad.

The only child still living at the family home, she has now left school giving her more time to "keep an eye" on her dad.

Each time Jayne goes away she fears what might await her when she returns.

Today is Jayne and Chris’s wedding anniversary.

It provides Chris with an increasingly rare moment of satisfaction.

With Jayne taking more and more responsibility, difficult decisions have to be made.

Chris is making his lasting power of attorney for when he can no longer decide for himself.

Day two of a family holiday in Llanbedr, north Wales.

For Jayne the holiday has brought home how much she needs a break away from Chris’s dementia.

She is caring for him 24-7 - cutting up his food, persuading him to eat and drink, directing him when he gets lost, alleviating his anxiety and helping him to understand when life gets confusing.

Chris’s anti-depressant drugs have been changed.

As his body adjusts to new treatment he has becomes increasingly agitated as the family prepare for Christmas.

It all becomes too much.

Chris is on new dementia medication which has resulted in a renewed sense of closeness and warmth with Jayne.

But Chris is entering a new phase in his illness.

It is becoming harder for him to process information.

Like understanding the concept of 'tomorrow'.

The family are back home after enjoying a relative’s wedding.

"It was nice to see dad chatting a bit," Kate says. "Because his balance is not really very good at all anymore he didn’t want to get up and dance at all."

"I’d sit down and be with him for a bit.

"The father of the bride was doing a speech about all the old times and it got me quite upset because I think maybe my dad won't be able to give me away... or if he's even here."

Not long after the wedding things take a turn for the worse.

Chris is in hospital.

But whatever dementia throws at them, Chris, Jayne and their family are determined to enjoy life together for as long as they can.

After all, things are changing very quickly.

You can watch the full programme Living With Dementia: Chris’s Story on the BBC iPlayer here

'I think I'd just like to say to all my family, I love you all. I always will... yeah, for the days that I maybe can't say it.'