News tweets: Obama, polls, Apple, football

News tweets

For the week ending 28 September, here is the news making waves in the US - condensed into 10 topical tweets, some more serious than others.

1. The Dowager Countess's zeppelin to LAX was delayed by bad weather over Iceland.

Author Josh Kilmer-Purcell (@joshkp) explains why Maggie Smith failed to pick up her Emmy for Best Supporting Actress for her role in Downton Abbey.

2.It's time for us all to stop thinking so literally and accept that Jimmy Hoffa is buried inside each of us.

The internet phenomenon known as Remiel (@Remiel) addresses new reports the mob-affiliated union boss, whose body was never found, may be buried under a driveway near Detroit.

3. It's good to have a hobby RT @PhilipRucker: Romney in PA: "We're gonna get that pipeline from Canada if I have to build it myself."

The Guardian's Richard Adams (@RichardA) riffs on a Washington Post writer's report from the Republican presidential candidate's rally.

4.I dunno, one ref signalled "The lockout is over!" at the exact same time the other one signaled "They're still negotiating!"

Quiz show champion Ken Jennings (@kenjennings) marks the end of the National Football League's lockout of its officials, days after a blown call changed the result of a widely viewed match.

5. Biased eye exam only says I have horrible vision b/c it's oversampling the eye that has way more problems. Unskew that bad boy & I'm 20/20!

Sam Baker (@sam_baker), a writer for The Hill newspaper, on conservative critics who say polls showing Barack Obama has pulled significantly ahead in swing states are biased or skewed.

6. Love that Obama folks are saying he hasn't had time to prep for debate. Yes, those appearances on Letterman and The View are tiring.

Syndicated columnist Ben Shapiro (@benshapiro) doesn't believe the Democratic spin that Barack Obama is unprepared for the upcoming presidential debates.

7. New plan to pay off student loans: fish the cotton ball with Kelly Osbourne's $250K nail polish out of a dumpster & pawn it!

Comedy writer Dina Gachman (@TheElf26) finds an alternate use for Kelly Osbourne's Emmy manicure, which included black diamonds. A bottle of the polish sells for quarter of a million dollars.

8.Somebody tell Bibi all you have to do to diffuse that bomb is wet your fingers and pinch the fuse, just like Bugs Bunny vs Yosemite Sam

National Review contributor Greg Pollowitz (@GPollowitz) on Israeli prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu's speech before the United Nations in which he used a cartoon drawing of a bomb to make a point about Iran's nuclear programme.

9. Hey Apple. I think I speak for all @BlackBerry owners when I say: APOLOGY NOT ACCEPTED!

Actor and comedian Todd Barry (@toddbarry) rejects Apple CEO Tim Cook's apology for problems with the company's new mobile map software.

10. Man Going To Show Up To Launch Of J.K. Rowling's New Book Dressed As Severus Snape Anyway

Satirical newspaper The Onion (@TheOnion) reports on a fictional Harry Potter fan's appreciation of the author's new adult novel.

Some tweets have been edited for clarity