I sent five letters to MM yesterday morning and a further five in the afternoon, each with a cunningly-constructed and somewhat witty play-on-words. I thought at least one would have made the grade for publication. Alas, it seems no pun in ten did.
David, Cardiff, Wales
Ah, but Michael (Wednesday's letters) - you would find that if you were a girl, you would still easily fit into size eight jeans, as the waistbands are now so low, they are only just respectable, and so do not need to cover the muffin-top.
May I remind those people that design trousers for our national retail chains that just because I've got long legs does not mean I am morbidly obese. This elementary knowledge of physiology seems to have escaped them.
Re: this story. Does no-one at the BBC know that ice hockey is played worldwide, including in our own little country?
Telford Tiger, Wolverhampton
Sorry, was unavoidably detained by work, am I too late for the big bird discussion? Hope not, anyway, yes, ostrich, largest, check, wandering albatross, biggest wingspan, check, but I think we need a mention for the world's largest (biologists usually mean heaviest when they say largest) flying bird, which is the great bustard.
John Knight, Beverley, UK
I found Jimmy's letter (Wednesday's letters) about snowplows a little confusing. Is Milton Keynes in America now?
Rob Falconer, Llandough, Wales