It all started to go wrong when that waiter chucked a glass of gin and tonic over me. An accident, of course. I thinked he tripped on the carpet and I leapt up just in time to avoid being clattered by ice cubes and a slice of lemon, but at such a violent angle that I could actually hear something go pop in my neck. I wouldn't mind, but I've been alcohol-free since the start of October and then I get drenched in someone else's booze.
That was Sunday night in Aberdeen. When I was leaving the city the following afternoon I had a stiff neck and also a bit of a sore throat and the start of a cough. I bought some flu-remedy in the new Union Square shopping mall connected to the train station. Very nice it is too. The mall, that is, not the flu remedy.
Tuesday morning I was at the BBC's offices at Tun in Edinburgh to be interviewed by Mike Wilson from allmediascotand.com. They've just revamped their website and it now includes podcast interviews with folk in the Scottish media. When I agreed to be quizzed I didn't expect I'd be running a temperature and sounding like I have one clothes peg on my nose and another on my tonsils.
Tuesday night I staggered aboard the train to Glasgow and by now I was shaking and shivering and starting to babble. Not exactly talking to myself, but random words were starting to slip out and disturb fellow passengers.
I got a table to myself, not surprisingly.
On Wednesday morning I was in such a state that I had to throw in the towel and head home. You'll recall it was a wet and miserable day across most of Scotland. Not the kind of day you want to be travelling. Not when you're feeling like one of the undead. Of course the trains were delayed and there's only so much comfort you can get from those cups of instant chicken soup they serve from the drinks trolley. I think I might have asked the trolley-man to tuck me in with a hot water bottle, but maybe not.
At about four o'clock in the afternoon, the train finally trundled into Inverness and Mrs. Zed was waiting for me in the family ambulance. Ten minutes later I was in bed and that's where I've been until today in fact.
I listened to loads of radio, mind you...and even managed to scratch out a few notes and comments on what I heard.
Back in the office tomorrow, I hope.