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Chris Evans | 08:23 UK time, Friday, 15 December 2006

Way behind today, I mean way behind.

Was a t a party last night…

…my friend has a doo every year at his house. It’s always a lavish affair as good as it gets to be honest. I’ll spare you the details but here’s just one of the things that happened during the course of the evening…

Bono, who was invited, couldn’t make it, so he sent a piper to make a speech and then walk around playing his pipes for five minutes!

I didn’t get home till two o’clock and I’ve got my first meeting in half an hour. After that it’s one more meeting, then Crimbo shopping, then the show and then…

I have to be in Chelsea at THE MILLION POUND CARNIVAL. This is a carnival that is the culmination of CELEBRITY APPRENTICE. Five guys have taken on five girls for COMIC RELIEF, it’s going to be hilarious.

The boys team is DANNY BAKER, ALISTAIR CAMPBELL, PIERS MORGAN, TIM (the winner of the apprentice) and RUPERT EVERET.


I have no idea exactly what I have to do but DANNY says I have to be there, so be there I will.

Then it’s dinner, then it’s sleep and then I have to be at SATURDAY KITCHEN for 8.a.m. tomorrow… I might even be so tired by then I’ll forget I have to cook live on the telly !

Phew, better get on then I suppose….




  1. At 08:50 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Dan the man in Belfast wrote:

    Good luck and may your God go with you today; try to avoid the shops as much as possible - you'll feel so much better - it'll be hellish this weekend . .

    Looking forward to the Evo interpretation of something special tomorrow morning - there has to be alcohol at some stage in the preparation, maybe???

    Have a good weekend, one and all . .

  2. At 08:56 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Cheryl wrote:

    CLP - you busy bunny you! May I suggest that your Sunday is spent snuggled up with a fair stash of nice stuff for sustenance and a stack of classic DVDs to while away the day. If you can get someone to deliver the Sunday papers to you, all the better .... go on, you deserve it - have a duvet Sunday!

    All request - may I suggest opening the show with Baby Its Cold Outside by Rod and Dolly - haven't heard this one yet on R2 this year and its a sure-fire classic!

    Have a fab time at millionnaire carnival - we're off to a lovely country pub for a Christmas meal with friends tonight, and then a christmas party with a different set of friends tomorrow night - and I'm not driving to either - woooooooohoooooooooooo!!!!

    Happy Friday to all fellow bloggers!

    Cheryl x

  3. At 08:57 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Matt from Rudgwick wrote:

    Morning Chris

    In complete contrast, I am sitting here in Rudgwick, the Ashes on in the background, contemplating how to fill the wonderful yawning chasm that is my day off.

    I think a short trip to the gym is in order as my man-flu has kept me away since Monday. Then, I'll go and finish my Christmas shopping before settling down to watch a couple of movies. I don't usually do 'nothing days', but I really fancy it today.

    By the way. According to 'research', veggies have higher IQs! Well, perhaps not all veggies, but apparently we are generally more intelligent!

    Roll on Mrs Myrtleberry's roast on Christmas Day.

    Off now to do very little.

    Peace all.

    PS Mott the Hoople and the game of life.

    PPS Tralala

    PPS Did you hear about the agnostic, dyslexic insomniac? He stays up all night pondering the existence of Dog.

  4. At 08:58 AM on 15 Dec 2006, jillygoat wrote:

    Good morning one and all

    The Carnival sounds like it's going to be terrific fun. I saw Danny Baker on TV recently - was it Have I Got News For You or QI - can't remember now - but he's very funny.

    To everyone who gave me advice yesterday regarding my pay rise etc, thank you so much - it's helped me to work out where I stand on this and will discuss it with the powers that be. Unfortunately, they are very elusive and trying to get someone to sit still for five minutes is really difficult, but I am nothing if not persistent!!!

    'Im indoors will find out on Monday whether he's got the job that he's had three interviews for - if he gets it then my decision is much easier as it's not about the money for me. I'd happily take a lower paid job that's a 15 minute walk from home rather than what I have now which is almost an hour's drive each way.

    Anyway, didn't get a chance to respond late yesterday so will take today's blog as a chance to say thanks to you all - you're great!!

    TFI Friday!!

    jillygoat xx

    PS My brother used to work with a guy called Russell Sprout - honestly - thought it might be appropriate given the time of year!!!

    PPS The boss has just taken a call from a Mr Christmas!!!!

    It just gets better & better .....

  5. At 09:01 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Jennie (from the blog) wrote:

    all request Carols perhaps?!

    thanks for the carols this week - takes me back to my days as a chorister at school. Amazing times - we used to sing in the village church every sunday and by request for weddings and even funerals. Awesome feeling (although the funerals were a bit creepy when you were only about 12. Standing there looking angelic, singing Panis angelicus and desperate to run about and go tree climbing.

    Good luck tomorrow

    Jennie from the blog.

  6. At 09:05 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Jax wrote:

    Morning all!!
    It's Friday - YAY!!

    Tracey-ann - thinking of you {{{{{hugs}}}}}

    Cathmel - I also have a home in New Forest, It's not near Fordingbridge by any chance is it?

    Here's to a great blog today.

    Lotsa love

    J x

  7. At 09:13 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Phoenix wrote:

    Good morning Chris - looking forward to the Saturday Kitchen.

    The Comic Relief apprentice sounds great fun, enjoy yourself.

    We had our departmental xmas do yesterday and it was fab.

    The weekend if nice looks like I should be going out for a long stroll along Studland beach but if its windy not good - who knows maybe some bave kitesurfers will be out showing all their moves, fascinating to watch.

    All the best for the weekend to everyone.

  8. At 09:22 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Garry Burton wrote:

    Please say hello to and spare a thought for my wife Vikki who has been sat up every night this week with our baby girl Millie who's got a cold, even though she's dead tired she's not complaining - Tell her to enjoy her Xmas do tonite !


  9. At 09:25 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Jax wrote:

    dwnb #99 (your last post on yesterdays blog). I can't answer as I read your blog so that'd be cheating!! It's a lovely name by the way x

  10. At 09:26 AM on 15 Dec 2006, TheBigUn wrote:

    Morning bloggers and schloggers

    Busy busy busy, sound like a normal day at work for me :-(

    Bono……name dropper :-))))

    I had to get Mrs B to drop me to the train station so that I did not have to drive as it is my office Christmas party today so I miss the show :-( Mrs B is then going to drive (my beer scooter) the 80+ mile round trip to get me as she thinks if I get on the train after drinking I will probably fall asleep and she will have to drive much further to retrieve me from the end of the line :-)

    Crimbo shopping, I have my list but that is as far as I have got with it so far. I think what I need is to hire a driver and be taken to all the best places around London and shop till I drop in a day!

    I have to admit to despising shopping with a passion. I find people so rude and in such a rush, Mrs B says my character changes as soon as I enter a shop ;-) I only have one hard and fast rule and that is I will only go to a checkout that has a pretty women to take my money. Somehow it is less painful that way ;-)

    I will be watching Saturday Kitchen through blurry eyes :-(

    Happy all request Friday everyone!


    P.S…….Philip and Robbie were being put to bed by Grandma who had come to stay for Christmas. They had their baths and were busy saying their prayers while Grandma tidied the bath room. Robbie the younger concluded his prayers with a list of presents he wanted for Christmas recited at the top of his voice "Quiet" Philip exclaimed. "God isn't deaf!" "No" replied the other, "But Grandma is!"

  11. At 09:38 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Alan Stanley wrote:

    You'll burn yourself out Mister, but you'll have fun doing so.

    Best wishes for an awesome weekend and have a great show tonight.

    Onwards and Upwards, It gets better and better !

  12. At 09:44 AM on 15 Dec 2006, DOGWITHNOBRAIN wrote:

    Take it easy today, and have some of that fizzy stuff you drop in water... not rennies, something to do with grapes. That always makes me feel awake. No Coffee, you'll feel worse for it later.

    Celebrity Apprentice? Is that the Big Gruff man programme who says "You're Fired". I don't know this programme. Don't watch an AWFUL lot of TV.

    Anyway. Break a Leg for Tomorrow (Not literally), but that's what you show biz types say eh? And REMEMBER the signal. "Nose, Ear, oh I have to wash my hands", and we'll all know you are thinking of us.


    PS Or Else you could just say, "Can I say Hello to all the Shloggers"

    PPS - Got My CAR BACK. All Fixed and Shiney. George is a miracle worker. Drove VERY Slowly to work this morning.

  13. At 09:46 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Lynne wrote:

    Hi Everyone,
    Sounds like a busy day Chris.

    We're off north today to take in an ice hockey game. Thought we'd make a day of it and explore the area also. My husband has just suggested we stay overnight and carry on exploring tommorow. So will miss the show tonight but will catch up with it and the blog over the weekend.

    Enjoy SK tomorrow Chris and everyone .

    Lynne x

  14. At 10:09 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Gaby wrote:

    Is it too early to put the sprouts on at perhaps a low simmer?

    ps mange tout

  15. At 10:31 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Dissing Dave wrote:

    Slow down man!!! It's nearly Christmas, you say you're excited with the anticipation of it coming, at the speed you're going it will have gone before you can say tracking Santa on the Norad website.

    What a fantastic idea, those wags at NORAD have the technology! I shall be putting my niece and nephew onto the site tonight ready for the magical day!

    Anyways up! This will be my last blog before Chrimbo as we are packing up the house ready to move on Tuesday and will then mainly be prepping for Chrimbo and the arrival of the Outlaws for dinner on the 25th.

    I wish you all a frohliche weihnachten, I think that's correct, at least that's what it says on my special Christmas silk boxers.

    Special christmas hugs to bloggers, schloggers, commentators, the drive-time krew and lurkers everywhere.

    DD out

  16. At 10:39 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Marky Sparky wrote:

    Hi Chris,

    Too much of a good thing had me feeling low this morning until a friend sent me the perfect remedy ...

    No tabets, no chemicals, no drugs but it worked a treat ... and I'm ready for a truly festive weekend

    enjoy https://www.bbc.co.uk/merryxmas.swf

    love the show,


  17. At 10:56 AM on 15 Dec 2006, ChrissieS wrote:

    Hi Chris (and everyone)

    What a busy day you have today! Really quite envious. Have a great time (would love Danny Baker to be a friend of mine!) and I look forward to seeing you tomorrow morning!

    We are off to Dublin on Sunday, my husband, daughter, her friend and my sister. Intend to walk over the Ha'penny Bridge and have Christmas cocktails at the Westbury Hotel!

    Hope everyone enjoys their weekend - ridiculous, I know, but I miss the blog so much over the weekend!

    C xx

    P.S. Tracey-Ann, thinking of you often.

    Teresa (from yesterday) the Nat King Cole song The Little Boy That Santa Claus Forgot makes me cry! My mother loved that song and she played it for me when I was a wee girl!

    Jillygoat, can I just say that you can be sure the "powers that be" are not going without! Funny, isn't it, that there's always enough in the kitty for THEIR bonuses, rises, etc but when it comes to the paid help, financial difficulties occur! It's the pits!

  18. At 10:58 AM on 15 Dec 2006, jillygoat wrote:

    Dissing Dave - happy crumble to you and yours - I wish you everything you wish yourselves. Good luck with the house move too xx

    To all bloggers lucky enough to be signing off for a week or two - pah!!! Some of us are here for another week yet :-(

    - at least we have CLP to keep us company though!!

    Over but not out

    jillygoat xx

    PS ((((hugs)))) to Tracey-Anne xx

  19. At 11:04 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Claire wrote:

    Hiya all,

    Full of Xmas cheer today - party party time and it starts in 52 minutes (and counting). After the meal it's Secret Santa, then I've done a festive quiz and then its off aroung town. Hubby brought me into work and is on taxi alert later on though if he does his usual and falls asleep snoring in front of the TV then it will be a real taxi!!
    Finished my Xmas shopping yesterday.

    Love and stuff(ing)
    Claire xx

  20. At 11:23 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Phoenix wrote:

    Prof Plum you are absolutely correct and I sit corrected and ashamed, I had assumed that Mudeford and Highcliffe were in Hampshire and they are in fact in Dorset.

    Mind you the bacon sarnies are fab there anyway.

    Off to Studland for a long wallk on Sunday I'm hoping the ferry is back in action or it will be a long drive!

    Sorry don't get to add often enough to the blog -but wish everyone all the best.

  21. At 11:39 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Gaby wrote:

    How long does it take for a punctured tyre to go flat again?

    No, my friends...this is not a joke it is a real and proper question.

    I thought my car was 'pulling' a little to the left....turns out one of my rear tyres was flat as a deflated pancake : (

    Just drove (just being the operative word) to local garage whose air facility was functioning (thankfully). Was secretly hoping to be rescued at garage by strapping garage mechanic who would offer to do a 'test to see if it's a puncture or a flat tyre' Never mind, maybe next time : )

    So many great posts to reply to guys, but am in bit of a rush to sort car out....but for now just wanted to wish DISSING DAVE all the best for your move and Happy Christmas. Hope I caught you before you signed off these pages. HOpe the move goes very smoothly.


    ps pneu de voiture

  22. At 11:44 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Susan wrote:

    Hey Chris and fellow bloggers!

    Sounds like a mad weekend, Chris, hope everything goes well for tomorrow. Did you decide what you're cooking yet?

    Am very giddy and excited today - Christmas generally! But my hubby is on his way home from Iraq for Christmas - he couldn't get home last year, so it's extra special this year. He'll be here first thing in the morning and after relaxing all day, we're off to Wells next the Sea in north Norfolk to see Santa who arrives by boat from Lapland on high tide tomorrow - how lovely!

    Have a great weekend all, don't forget to put your Brussel Sprouts on!

    #4 Jillygoat, my cousin used to work with a Penny Liquorice!!!

    Take care y'all.

  23. At 11:45 AM on 15 Dec 2006, lyndyloo wrote:

    Morning Chris & fellow bloggers!

    Friday already!!! Have loads to do before heading off to Andorra on Sunday for a few days before Christmas. It usually snows the day I arrive in Arinsal but there's none forecast just yet... will have to keep my fingers crossed. Then when I get back I've got tickets to see Jools Holland on the 23rd and not even decided who I'm going to invite yet... how exciting!

    Have a fab Friday everyone!



  24. At 11:51 AM on 15 Dec 2006, EG (Scotland) wrote:

    I'm on early for once - but just a quick one.

    Good luck for SK tomorrow - and do give us a signal.


  25. At 11:52 AM on 15 Dec 2006, Prof Plum wrote:

    Morning all and one
    The Christmas show is off at the home for retired carbaret artisits. This was due to an unfortunate accident last night, well infact foul play is suspected. Leggie was found dead in his new akia trunk.

    Well it leaves me more time to write a few Christmas cards and also read The wonderful World of Joseph Mc Crumble which arrived this morning.

    Happy Party time everyone

  26. At 12:25 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Tiggy wrote:

    Afternoon all bloggers etc
    Sounds like a riot, you'll defo need Sunday to chill! Good luck on SK tomorrow, hopefully I'll manage to get back from town at 10 on the dot as I did last week but I'll try not to sleep thru the whole show as I did then!

    On the subject of Christmas Crackers (not really mentioned today but I've been too busy all week to comment), I too love Baby It's Cold Outside but find Tom and Cerys far superior to Rod and Dolly (sorry!) and the best ever crimbo song in the world Fairytale of New York!
    Tracey-Ann - How'd your relative do in the Celeb jungle (meant to ask before now)

  27. At 12:27 PM on 15 Dec 2006, cathmel wrote:

    Dissing Dave - good luck with your move xxxx

    Tracey-Ann {{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}

    More later


  28. At 12:33 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Tiggy wrote:

    Afternoon all bloggers etc
    Sounds like a riot, you'll defo need Sunday to chill! Good luck on SK tomorrow, hopefully I'll manage to get back from town at 10 on the dot as I did last week but I'll try not to sleep thru the whole show as I did then!

    On the subject of Christmas Crackers (not really mentioned today but I've been too busy all week to comment), I too love Baby It's Cold Outside but find Tom and Cerys far superior to Rod and Dolly (sorry!) and the best ever crimbo song in the world Fairytale of New York!
    Tracey-Ann - How'd your relative do in the Celeb jungle (meant to ask before now)

  29. At 12:47 PM on 15 Dec 2006, dr blogmum wrote:

    I know how you feel, I 'm still thinking about a backalong blog you did ref: dancing.
    This is why I have come to the conclusion that blogging is not my medium....I prefer to think around a subject before I commit thoughts to the blank box. Who wants to appear banale and obvious when they blog...not I.
    Anyrate back to the elder dancing humiliation potential.......by way of an illustration pour example think Joaquin in 'To Die For'. He was 16 yrs old actor then and was doing the then thing but Nichole dances seductively as the older women comme ca to the same tune...Yeah! hysterical. But heres the rub ...both are really cool regardless. Message ...Carry On Regardless.
    You could try a bit of age-tourist dancing and copy the youngsters, but they dont like it when youre better than them.....or worse still pluck out a young partner de jour from their posing posse.

  30. At 12:52 PM on 15 Dec 2006, dr mum wrote:

    just remembered.......I went to a party in Brisbane that Bono didnt turn up to either!

  31. At 12:54 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Prof Plum wrote:

    Traffic update for Phoenix

    The Studland ferry is now open. please be careful if kite surfing however, as the wind conditions could carry you off to Holland.

  32. At 12:55 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Steevie fae Dundee + Glas wrote:

    Today's "Friday frivolity". Given the blog on God the other day (which is just as well I missed on the day, and now too late to throw my £42.96 in), I thought I would post this. Make up your own minds which, if either, is the correct one:-

    Eve’s conversation with God

    “Lord, I know that you created me and provided
    this beautiful garden and all of these wonderful
    animals as well as that hilarious comedic snake
    but – and I don’t want to sound ungrateful –
    I’m lonely and I’m sick to death of apples.”

    “In that case Eve”, says God,
    “I shall create a man for you”

    “A man……… what is that ?”

    “A flawed creature my dear with many bad habits.
    He will lie, cheat and be vain. All in all he
    will give you a hard time. But he will be bigger
    and faster than you and will like to hunt and
    kill things. I will create him in such a way
    he will satisfy all your physical needs.
    He will be witless though and will revel in
    childish things like fighting and kicking
    a ball about. He won’t be as smart as you,
    so he will also need your advice to think
    properly. *BUT*, I can only give him to you
    on one condition”

    “Which is ?”

    “As I said, he will be vain which will also
    make him proud, arrogant and self admiring.
    So you will have to let him believe that I
    made him first. It will *HAVE* to be our
    little secret………………you know,
    woman to woman.”

    Adam’s conversation with God

    “Man, I’m bored. I’ve no-one to talk to other
    than you but you sometimes talk in riddles
    which means I don’t always understand what
    you mean AND your sense of humour can go
    right over my head. I try to talk to the
    animals but I don’t understand them when
    they talk back. Can’t you make me a companion
    so that I can show them around this wonderful
    garden you have made.It really is too generous
    of you for one person and I wouldn’t mind sharing. Honest! ………… Please ?”

    “Well”, responds God, “I *could* make you a

    “A what ? Is that another animal ?”

    “No no. Another human like you but different.
    She will cook and clean for you, your wish will
    be her every command without moaning or nagging. She will love you unconditionally
    and will NEVER ‘have a headache’ ”

    “Sounds wonderful, what is THAT gonna cost

    “An arm and a leg”, God responds laughing.

    Adam ponders for a moment and asks
    “Wot you got for a rib ?”

  33. At 01:07 PM on 15 Dec 2006, DogwithNoBrain wrote:


    www.emailsanta.com absolutely brilliant.

    I've just written my letter, and got an imediate, personalised response, then I watched Santa doing his chimney exercises and then best of all, looked at the Live Web Cam of the Penguins in the ARctic / Antarctic whichever it is they are in.

    I've be visiting this site for about 4 years, and just thought I'd share it with you.


  34. At 01:17 PM on 15 Dec 2006, jillygoat wrote:

    Lyndyloo - have a fantastic time in Andorra!!

    I saw Jools Holland at an open air concert in Kent last year - we took a picnic and table & chairs with us and the atmosphere was brilliant. Jools and his band were out of this world - Vic Reeves joined him on stage towards the end of the night as well and they really enjoyed themselves.

    If you can't find anyone to take with you, then ooh me, me, me!!!!! Look - I've got my hand up!!!!!

    jillygoat xx

  35. At 01:31 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Lordy wrote:

    Where's my previous post Chris?

    Don't like my input then?

    Never mind, I guessed you wouldn't post my blog anyway.

    Have a good show tonight and a good weekend.


  36. At 01:58 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Cheryl wrote:

    Hmmm .... bit of debate over which version of Baby It's Cold Outside ...

    I always find the Tom/Cerys version a bit lecherous ... he sounds like he's not had any dinner and poor Cerys doesn't stand a chance. The Rod/Dolly version, in my humble opinion, is a tad more tongue in cheek and you can almost see the naughty twinkle in Rods eye as he's singing to the Busty One.

    Hmmmm .... not very busy at work and feel frustrated at being stuck here. Want to go home, curl up and watch Love Actually with a big box of chocs.

    {{{{{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}}}}}}} to all fellow bloggers for a FANTASTIC weekend!


    PS: 10 sleeps til Santa x x x

  37. At 02:03 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Prof Plum wrote:

    Traffic update for Phoenix

    The Studland ferry is now open. please be careful if kite surfing however, as the wind conditions could carry you off to Holland.

  38. At 02:23 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Lordy wrote:

    Where's my previous post Chris?

    Don't like my input then?

    Never mind, I guessed you wouldn't post my blog anyway.

    Have a good show tonight and a good weekend.


  39. At 02:24 PM on 15 Dec 2006, jillygoat wrote:

    What a quiet little blog it is today.

    Cheryl # 29 - can I come home with you please? I'm at work and having to listen to the fellas moaning about how much they have to do at Christmas - hah! LOL!!!

    I'd far rather be watching Love Actually with choccies - and perhaps a glass of cheeky merlot.

    Cheryl, what say you? I can be ready by 3pm!

    jillygoat xx

  40. At 02:29 PM on 15 Dec 2006, AGP wrote:

    Girls in my office talking about getting a dog for xmas - I said I was going to stick to Turkey. boom boom.

    Just a week to go and usual man stuff of at least thinking about what to buy Mrs P for Xmas. decided on a diamond pendant - went to the jewellers and 20 minutes later, and significantly poorer, she will soon be the proud owner of bling!!

    Chris great show - brilliant blog (shlog) keep the faith for Xmas

  41. At 02:33 PM on 15 Dec 2006, jillygoat wrote:

    Forgot to say - on the subject of Love Actually and Christmas songs:

    I love "All I Want for Christmas is You" from the film and think it's my favourite version. The girl who sings it has a great voice and it makes me want to dance around.

    I've got the soundtrack in my car as we speak, so I'll blast it out on my way to Cheryl's!!!!!

    jillygoat xx

  42. At 02:45 PM on 15 Dec 2006, DogwithNoBrain wrote:

    What about it?


    Lovely Jubly.

  43. At 02:50 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Joannie wrote:

    Hi Topher, Uncle Tom Cobbly and all (there isn't a Tom Cobbly on here is there :-)

    Well Mr. E....you certainly move in the very best of circles - so why couldn't Bono make it I wonder??

    The carnival sounds like a hoot and GOOD LUCK tomorrow morning.

    Tracey-Ann - (((thinking about you))) we are all here for you.

    Susan - how absolutely great your hubby is home from Iraq - give him hugs and kissses from everyone - ...have a special time with him. I cannot imagine what it must be like having him (and all of them) so far away...

    Dissing Dave - good luck with the move...keep us posted.

    Matt from R - yes you are absolutely right, veggies have a higher IQ - of course!! :-) We should exchange receeeeps :-)

    Jillygoat - good for you - keep on 'em.

    DWMB - Thanks for the great card - so funny.

    Lynne - have fun at your hockey game...my kids were in hockey for 12 years - every weekend - I have sat in many cold arenas - but now they are at Uni, I actually miss it!!

    Marky Sparky # 16 - everybody go the link - you too CHRIS - it is wonderful. I laughed, thanks for that.

    Big Un - enjoy your partaaaay and loved the joke, as usual :-)

    Have a great weekend everyone....
    Yes, keep the chrimbo carols coming today Chris - or at least John Lennon today please :-)

    Joannie xxxxx

    I also wanted to say that if anyone is off on holidays or not coming back for a good blogging next week, I wish you all the very very best for Christmas and the new year and see you 2007. This is a great bunch of peeps so lets stay in touch

  44. At 02:52 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Tracey-Ann wrote:

    Good Afternoon All,

    Mr. E - GOOD LUCK tomorrow!!! Enjoy this evening you social butterfly you :)

    Doctor called this morning...My fabulous Mother is on the way to the surgery now to pick up new medication. Had a bad reaction to two lots of the meds I have been taking this week. Hopefully this will counter-balance and make me feel LOTS better in time for Christmas !!!!

    Jax, JillyGoat and Cathmel- Thanks for the hugs :)

    Joannie and Lyndaloo - Watch your inboxes !!

    Gaby, Keith, Moose, ChrissieS - Thank You so much for the thoughts :) -if I forgot anyone, sorry ! :(

    Tiggy - My relative did very very well, thanks for asking. Some might say they have been treated like royalty ! ;)

    I so wanted to go to my allotment this weekend, take up the last of the parsnips, gather a few more sprouts and check on my winter onions. Not sure if I’m going to be up to it now though :( Maybe Sunday for a bit of the weather holds off and I have a good rest tomorrow !

    Last weekend completely took it out of me. I really should listen to my body ! I was supposed to go to "An Audience With..." on the Saturday and then on the Sunday a pre-record for a BBC thing that the lovely Graham Norton has done for New Years Eve. In the end I just went to the Graham Norton thing. It was fab. McFly (minus Harry) were there - delights as ever. I had a great chat with the highly charismatic John Barrowman (lovely lovely man) about the fantastic Torchwood and his up and coming union. Loads of great people there (and some really miserable ones - won`t say who but good Lord they really don’t do themselves any favours !!!) Orson played live too and did a cover of Gnarls Barkleys "Crazy"... Myleene looked like she needed a good feed but was a beautiful as ever, Bill Oddie was hilarious... etc etc etc. Chris you were the answer to one of the quiz questions too !!!

    I think its going out on BBC 1 at 9 on New Years Eve.

    So looking forward to the weekend. I`m not going to go out at all. Total relaxation with maybe a visit to my allotment. Bliss !!!

    I`ll definitely catch up with the blog and listen again though !

    Enjoy your weekends one and all

    All of my love as always

    Tracey-Ann x x x

  45. At 02:53 PM on 15 Dec 2006, DogwithNoBrain wrote:


    I don't think it is quiet. I've been postin like mad. Think the Blog Police are out and about again......


  46. At 02:58 PM on 15 Dec 2006, DogwithNoBrain wrote:

    Every Party I've been at Bono always fails to appear.


  47. At 03:04 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Charles Sweeney wrote:

    Sounds like a fun party. You're a busy boy! Thanks for sharing. I take it you do stop for breath from time to time?

    Looking forward to All Request Friday!

  48. At 03:06 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Cheryl wrote:

    Hey jilligoat .... are you in Suffolk? I'm almost nodding off at my desk - have gone thru a year's worth of email housekeeping, ordered some stuff from Amazon, done a little bit of real work .... will be leaving here at about 3.30 after our on-site maintenence man has returned from buying screen wash for my car! At least I get looked after here - sometimes its cool being the only girlie on a site full of Alpha Males! On that subject ....

    Alpha Males are a really funny species, don't you think? Some of the twoddle they come out with here has me in stitches and the AMs can't see what's so funny. Example: who can eat the hottest chiliis, who can drink the most pints of lager and the strongest % of lager, who pulled the most 'girls' on a Saturday night (I'd rather be referred to as a woman than a girl!!) .. honestly, they are SO funny sometimes.

    Anyhooooo, best post this - postings seem to take ages to get published some days and are fairly quick on others. Bizarre.

    Take care everyone!

    Cheryl x

  49. At 03:08 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Lordy wrote:

    Hi again Chris

    Just a thought. How about explaining what can be allowed on the blog as, surely if I have a point to make, although it doesn't perhaps put a celebrity in a good light, it is just as valid as anyone elses blog. Is it really worth having a blog that just panders to the sychophants and doesn't allow individual thought.

    Let me know what was upsetting, someone taking the mickey out of Bono clapping or my thoughts that he is a self opinionated twat? I really like U2 and have no problem with the thoughts that he has political and humanitarian views but if they don't coincide with mine, shouldn't I be allowed to say so, even on this forum?

    Anyway, be good and have a good show tonight.

  50. At 03:28 PM on 15 Dec 2006, jillygoat wrote:

    Cheryl - not in Suffolk unfortunately, but down in Kent, so guess I won't be able to make it after all. Ah well ....

    I work with five Alpha Males and today's conversation has been who had the dodgiest stomach and who went the longest without going to the loo. Honestly, I couldn't believe it (actually I could) but I found it highly amusing, much to their chagrin!!!!

    Will watch Love Actually tomorrow with 'im indoors instead then, with the obligatory choccies and wine - will think of you!

    jillygoat xx

  51. At 03:35 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Phoenix wrote:

    Many thanks Prof Plum for the ferry report.

    I don't currently kitesurf but luv watching them.

    Have a great weekend one and all

    Will be watching SK to see Chrissie in action.


  52. At 03:43 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Lordy wrote:

    Well thanks for that. See it is worth asking.

    Cheers my man


  53. At 03:49 PM on 15 Dec 2006, ian wrote:

    cheryl (post 42)..

    I may have been an "AM" as you define it in my younger days - late teens etc, but I like to think I have grown up since then..!!

    I know what you mean about being referred to as a woman, rather than a girl... although in honesty I don't think that other folks mean to be demeaning in any way if they describe females as "girls"... it's just a figure of speech.. as is of course "boys" or "guys" or "chaps" or "lads" etc...

    I do remember one occasion, whilst on a residential course from university, a drunken argument had started... a "woman" had taken great exception to females in general being referred to as "girlies"... each to their own, and fair enough, but said "woman" continued her rant about that being the worst thing she could be called etc..!! realising by now that a "pull" was out of the question (I was only 19 at the time) I ended the argument by defending my (innocent) use of the word "girlie", by stating "it would be a lot worse if I had said 'c0ck-fodder'..!"

    that shut her up.. worse thing she could have been called indeed..!!

    and, to give a bit more background, I wouldn't have referred to women as that ever, had I not heard our local PRIEST (!) warn my sister "not to become c0ck-fodder for the boys" when she was about to start university herself..!! a Priest, I ask you..!!

  54. At 04:49 PM on 15 Dec 2006, ChrissieS wrote:

    Just checking in before the weekend commences!

    Tracey-Ann - och, I KNEW your relative was Matt!! When you said something along the lines of "Who is voting for Jan?!" I thought, I'll bet it's Matt!!! I was so pleased he won - after that last bushtucker trial which was SO cruel, he really deserved it!

    You are going through the wars at the moment, you wee pet lamb! We are all thinking of you and hopefully your new medicine will balance things up and you'll start to feel better. Take care, o.k. BTW, sounds like you have a bit of an exciting life too (not when you're ill obviously!). John Barrowman - love him.

    Dissing Dave, hope I haven't missed you - have a very happy Christmas and hope the move goes o.k. Sounds just a touch nutty to be having the outlaws for lunch on Christmas Day, but hey ho!

    Love to all.

    C xx

  55. At 04:50 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Joannie wrote:

    Hi again,
    I know it seems like the blog is quiet but I think teh problem is that it is taking a long long time for the comments to actually appear on the blog. I think the blog police have been into the sauce - they are partying too much to be reading our blogging :-))))).....this is my second entry today and my first has not appeared yet and I sent it two hours ago........ I guess the BP have to have Christmas fun too :-)
    Joannie xxx

  56. At 05:10 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Andy wrote:

    AH a xmas hangover eh Chris A dose of Paul Wellers Broken Stones would sought that out, good tune as well.

  57. At 05:28 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Susie wrote:

    Molton Brown? Oh to be one of your girls Chris! Philosophy stuff is always a winner too boys :-)

    I've just got into work to discover that I'm working today and tomorrow and then I've got two days off! Result! All the rotas have changed as I've got time off for Christmas. What a treat!

    I've done my Christmas shopping too Chris - it feels great! I started on the wrapping last night which is my favourite bit...glass of wine, good tunes and spread myself out on the floor - ace!

    Working til 11.30pm tonight Chris so feel free to play something Christmassy for me...or get round to sending me your number!!!

    S x

  58. At 05:37 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Ross Hemsworth wrote:

    Oh you is such a busy boy Christopher! lol

    Have a great Christmas Chris and well done on winning over all the knockers who wanted to keep Johnny Walker - he was a hard act to follow, but you did it!

    Ross Hemsworth
    Net Talk Radio

  59. At 06:12 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Charles Sweeney wrote:

    Young Christophe is pretty good at the Johhny Vegas!

    You would need a lie down after that!

  60. At 06:21 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Susie wrote:

    Blog police are drunk! Are they having a laugh today or what?!

    Chris - I eat left handed but I'm not left handed too! Strange but true.

    S x

  61. At 06:30 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Jenny wrote:

    My word Chris, you are burning the mid-night oil! Personally I think that cooking when you are a little sleepy is always the best. You don't get so strung up about how perfect everything is and so the cooking is more relaxed and less pressured. So enjoy it, the experiance will be a hoot and well worth it. Then, my personal advice would be to take a sauna, have a massage and go to a quiet pub for some food, hitting the hay early. Sounds bliss to me!

  62. At 06:54 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Gaby wrote:

    good afternoon friends,

    good luck tomorrow Chris, mange tout et pomme de terre

    Tracey-Ann - I wish I was able to help you on your allotment. I hope that you feel up to it and are able to spend a few moments there. I haven't opened a Delia Smith cookery book for ages but she does a pretty good 'parmesan parsnips'. Hope your new medication helps you. Take care

    jillygoat - keep us posted with the job thing. Enjoy Love Actually - such a great film - many poignant and beautifully-composed scenes (in my opinion!). I heard a lovely little anecdote about Richard Curtis' directing of that film. So used to writing as opposed to directing was he, that he would forget to shout 'ACTION'. He was kinda stood there, actors poised, waiting for someone else to say it : ) My fave scene has to be when Andrew Lincoln shows the cards to Kiera KNightley. Although my 'class acting' award has to go to Emma THompson when she goes upstairs and straightens the bed cover (sorry, that sounds flippant, when , in fact it is such a sad scene - always has me in tears).

    Have just realised you didn't ask for a preview/review - my post probably won't make it through the BP anyway - so i will leave it as is : )

    Moose - let us know how it went.

    Boys down under - keep your spirits up and take to the field tomorrow as if you won the first two tests

    buenos notches


  63. At 07:46 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Matt from Rudgwick wrote:


    Hope all went well today. I am a true believer in what's meant to be is meant to be, if you get my gist.

    I am going to make a concerted effort to write over the holidays, I really think that is my calling.

    Best of luck to Mr E tomorrow, I'll try and catch up with him at the gym before Christmas.

    Peace all. Have a great weekend.

    PS Stradlater

    PPS So long Marianne

  64. At 09:06 PM on 15 Dec 2006, Gaby wrote:

    Matt (from R)... was just having a peek at the last few posts and something you said really struck me. The fact that you feel that 'writing ' is your calling etc.

    How great that must be to really FEEL that that is what you should be and want to be doing. I have taken a change in direction career-wise, ie am in between jobs!! lol!! packed my last career in etc etc.....I guess I would really like to discover the job that is 'really me'. I am 43 now and ..... well, long story, long story...

    Anyway, good luck with your writing - you certainly have a lovely way with words - go for it, my virtual friend, and make it happen. I will do the same, if and when I 'feel' what it is I should be doing. I guess that is where the real motivation and kick-start to make it happen occurs ie when you 'feel' you are doing what is really you.


  65. At 07:52 AM on 16 Dec 2006, des merrion wrote:

    Caught first 45 minutes last night captain, sorry, i'd been at work since at work from 4am, slaving with my thimble, five kids to keep you know!!
    Always, always watch cooking on Saturday with missus, now't else on is there?
    can't wait to see what you cremate kid, go on, give us a laugh.

  66. At 09:34 AM on 16 Dec 2006, brenda gibb wrote:

    Thank you Chris for making the run up to Xmas such fun I feel really chrismissy because of you....trying to find the flight details of Santa have a good one Chris lots of love and smackers xxxx

  67. At 10:13 AM on 16 Dec 2006, Charles Sweeney wrote:

    "She Loves you" on the cooking programme!

    That is dedication to the listener. Unparalleled on the wireless.

    Live telly, a lot to think about, getting interviewed, yet had the Drivetime listeners fully in mind.

    You're some man Chris! Thank you.

  68. At 10:39 AM on 16 Dec 2006, Jax wrote:

    Chris! You absolute star. SK - all that to remember and you still thought of us. How much do I love you??? You are coming across brilliantly and can hold your own with the professional chefs. Big pat on the back you :-)

    Hope all bloggers got to see it too?

    Lotsa love,

    J x

  69. At 11:09 AM on 16 Dec 2006, Gaby wrote:


    As far as this gal is concerned....She Loves You

    Well done you. What a star. Be prepared for requests to host your own cookery show - I think Jimbo knows he has a natural in his studio -you are so genuinely interested Chris - a real inspiration



  70. At 11:29 AM on 16 Dec 2006, Gaby wrote:

    Re SK....

    I don't know if it's just me....but James is very curt, nay, a touch rude to Chris. Chris is only asking questions, being interested and Jimbo is taking the mick. I think he feels threatened by CE. I haven't watched SK before - and I won't again if shirty Jimbo hosts it each week.

  71. At 01:06 PM on 16 Dec 2006, Judy Rushen wrote:

    Just seen you this morning on that kitchen thingy, thought you were wonderful. As I'm at work on Christmas day would you like to come and cook for me and my family, spend the evening chatting and playing games??

    If not have fun Chris

  72. At 01:39 PM on 16 Dec 2006, Jax wrote:

    Gaby - I thought the same thing but I thought I was being over sensitive! James Martin came across as though he was irritated. Annoyed me actually - I usually watch the show but I think I'll think twice in future. Well done Chris for not reacting badly

    J x

  73. At 02:12 PM on 16 Dec 2006, kaz wrote:

    Happy Christmas Chris incase
    I don't get a chance in the next


  74. At 02:35 PM on 16 Dec 2006, Mariella Wolenski, apparently! wrote:

    Hello hello and seasons tidings to all.

    I have been away yet again. Had to go to Spain to babysit! Seems I have missed much and it has taken me 3 days to catch up.

    I will now attempt to join in the past blogs, but apologies if I miss anything.

    I am 33.

    My 3 things to do today are ;

    Food shopping
    Go out with my best mate.

    3 things I would rather do are ;

    Go out with my best mate
    Make mince pies
    Take cats for a walk.

    I used to know a young lady called Teresa Green - totally true, went to school with her. And heard a rumour about a girl in another school called Annette Curtain.

    I believe that each person is entitled to their own faith or belief without criticism from others, and that people should be allowed to find their own faith without being pressured, cajoled or manipulated. I don't know if evil exists - I know there is cruelty, madness, intolerence, corruption, crime and so on - but evil to me would mean totally hell bent on causing chaos, hurting others and not contain an ounce of human thought or emotion. Even Hitler loved his dog.

    And my name is not Mariella Wolenski, apparently! I guess the apparently gives it away. This pseudonym was given to me by Chris Evans himself when he read out my text message about not being able to poach eggs in a kettle. I don't know why my real name was not read out, but hey - I like this one. Kinda exotic, romantic and mysterious don't you think.

    Anyway, Spain was very nice. Did lots of stomping up and down mountains with 2 mad dogs and an englishman, drove on the wrong side of the road for the first time and am continuing to do so back here much to my passengers amusement (?). Wrote 4 postcards then spent the rest of my time in Spain trying to find stamps - virtually impossible.

    So 9 days til christmas, then two weeks later off to New Zealand. My suitcase has never been so busy.

    Thats all for now,

    MW. a!

  75. At 03:07 PM on 16 Dec 2006, Ali wrote:

    Hey Chris

    The banter on Saturday Kitchen was great :) Saturday cars, knife sharpening hints and the plate :)

    Followed by Jamie Oliver's mum embarrassing him lol

    Have a great weekend and thanks for making my journeys home less stressful


  76. At 03:31 PM on 16 Dec 2006, MWK wrote:

    Chris you were brilliant, I love you for being you xx

    Gaby and Jax - I agree. James obviously felt threatened by Chris. I thought he was very rude, and just for the record the picture is on his website! Well done Chris for doing your homework :-) I am - sorry was - a fan of James Martin and regular viewer of SK, won't be tuning in again unless Mr E becomes host!

    Gaby, hope you are feeling better xx

    Jax - I've been thinking about you, hope things are ok xx

    Tracey-Ann - I think and pray for you everyday, lots of love and {{{{{{hugs}}}}}} xx

    Susan S - Thanks for your insomnia tips. I have asked my homeopathic consultant for help with my sleep but as I having treatment for ME & depression she says she wants to wait for a bit before she tackles the insomnia. I might try Reika, I don't know much about it but I have heard it's very effective. Thanks again xx

    I haven't blogged recently because it's just manic at work but you have all helped me get through my sleepless nights. I very BIG thank you from the bottom of my heart xx

    Just incase I don't get the chance to blog again.

    Chris, Mrs Evans and all my virtual friends - I wish you and your families a VERY HAPPY CHRISTMAS and THE VERY BEST OF LOVE, LUCK AND HAPPINESS FOR 2007.

    Take care all
    Lots of love
    Mary xx

  77. At 05:10 PM on 16 Dec 2006, Caroline wrote:

    Dear Chris

    You were great..On SK and generally anyway! you know, maybe you should look at a TV prog involving food...You'd be great, you have a real zest and passion for it.

    Please tell us all the goss from behind the scenes at SK..was Janette the Home Economist like what you thought?

    I think I could comment on Monday, but after that I'm going to Paris to look at my products on supermarket shelfs..so won't be back until Manic thursday..Therefore to you and all other bloggers/commentors/chaps and chapettes...


    LOVE CarolineX

  78. At 06:11 PM on 16 Dec 2006, Jill wrote:

    Dear Big and Wonderful Bunch - of hollies and mistletoes!

    Joining the blog (very soon after it started) has been one of the most positive things I've done this year, thanks Chris and all of us.

    It's all so friendly and thought-provoking and you, CLP, are a true inspiration and fill our lives with light and laughter. Wasn't BBC2 called 'The Light Programme' in the dim and distant past? Before my time I think....

    Chris, you're a great cook and have just the right attitude.

    Tracey-Ann, I also think and pray for you, usually when I'm in my special 'sentry box' place in the garden. Hope you managed a session in the allotment in this afternoon's beautiful winter sunshine, Wish good things for the rest of you all too, Big 'Un, Hazel L, Matt from R, DD, DWNB, Mary, jillygoat, Susan, Prof Plum, JMcC, MW a! and everyone else ... I'm listening and living it, even when not talking.

    Big hugs 0000
    (Plain and oridinary) Jill with no 'Ian' on the end!xxx

  79. At 06:44 PM on 16 Dec 2006, moose wrote:

    Hi all,
    Thanks for the wishes..I did post late on Thursday but it got snatched!

    All meetings seemed to go well. I think I managed to hide all my fatal character flaws from them all, and expect to be flooded with amazing offers over the next week or two!
    Now have serious blisters from London street stomping!

    Matt from R - although I am still harbouring the thought at the back of my mind about the writing thing, I need it proven that I can do it full-time and profitably enough to feed Mrs Moose and the mooselets. That will mean getting my book published and selling some copies. I reckon that's going to take at least another 6 months, so I can usefully gather more stories for my "corporate life" introspective, which is my plan for the next book, during that time.

    Am feeling distinctly ill today and have spent most of the day in bed. Just a touch of man-flu probably! I'll have stopped complaining by Monday, maybe...
    Even meant I missed SK this morning...oh well.

    Greetings to all who are about on this Saturday evening! Enjoy the rest of the weekend.

  80. At 07:13 PM on 16 Dec 2006, Susie wrote:

    Well Mr Evans,

    I didn't know if I was going to get to see your Saturday Kitchen debut as I was working today but it turned out not until 12 so I flicked on the TV just in time to see you looking incredibly handsome and cooking like a pro! Great banter with the Martin too. You did yourself proud, well done champ!

    I hope it's kick-started your weekend and the rest of it is just as wonderful.

    Catch you on Monday evening my sweet.

    Christmas time, mistletoe and wine...

    S x

  81. At 08:24 PM on 16 Dec 2006, Tigger76 wrote:

    Wasn't that the best SK yet? I e-mailed you Chris a couple of weeks ago and you ignored me. Ho hum. I knew this would be the best show this year. The lovely JM with the desirable CE. Food Heaven.

    More please BBC.

  82. At 10:17 PM on 16 Dec 2006, anna wrote:

    blimey, i have the sharpets knives in cristendom....and my car windows are still in one piece. result.

    CLP you did yourself proud, despite James' apparent insecurities. He really should watch that programme back and think about it!

    And darn, you are looking good CLP. How come men look better with age....... it is so unfair.


    PS Thinking of you Tracy Ann.

  83. At 11:39 PM on 16 Dec 2006, Lynne wrote:

    Hi just called in to see how it went this morning. Judging by the comments I have scanned, seems to have gone very well. But we wouldn't have expected anything else. I'm just sorry we don't get SK in Sweden!

    Will have to catch up with all the comments tomorrow.

    MWK # 76 - hope you don't get to see this, might mean you're getting a good night's sleep.

    Oh I saw a shooting star last night!

    Night all. We're an hour ahead here.

    Lynne x

  84. At 07:22 AM on 17 Dec 2006, sarah wrote:

    Hey, just watched you in Top Gear - we're in New Zealand so I guess we're rather behind the times. Sarah

  85. At 10:03 AM on 17 Dec 2006, Lynne wrote:

    A good morning to everyone this frosty Sunday morning. Maybe there is hope for snow at Christmas after all.

    Can anyone post a synopsis of SK for anyone like me who didn't get to see the show and couldn't record it either?


    Hope you all have a Happy Sunday.

    Lynne x

  86. At 11:09 AM on 17 Dec 2006, Roy wrote:

    You were brilliant on Saturday Kitchen, and gave, as you always do, everyone a good laugh, brilliant recipe Chris, we tried it last night, and it was realy good! (By the way I was amazed at your knowledge of " Bread Crumbs" hehe!!)

  87. At 01:02 PM on 17 Dec 2006, Butcher wrote:

    Wow the ladies group is quite a frightening. Hope you didn't get on the wrong side of them Chris!

  88. At 01:37 PM on 17 Dec 2006, Caroline Harris wrote:

    Hi Chris
    I see you managed to make Saturday Kitchen for 8 am, and jolly entertaining you were too. In fact, you pretty much hijacked the show, best episode of the cooking show I've seen this year. Can I also say how damned smart you looked:- a right handsome dandy. They had some old scruffian from Oz in a tight blue V neck Tshirt with chest hair showing and he could not hold a candle to you babe. We may be rubbish at cricket but when it comes to style, well they just have not got the threads have they ?
    Best wishes
    Caroline :0)

  89. At 04:05 PM on 17 Dec 2006, Big Sister wrote:

    Hmmmm. I see you only post on work days, Chris. Perhaps you need to have a chat with Eddie Mair?

  90. At 04:43 PM on 17 Dec 2006, Joseph McCrumble wrote:

    Hello all

    I unfortunately missed Saturday Kitchen this weekend. I was all ready to watch our Blog Leader cook something when suddenly the smoke alarm went off. We have several of them at the Institute, and I was initially unsure as to what had happened. But, as I emerged from the living area into the main corridor, I could see the smoke coming from the kitchen. I rushed forwards to meet Denise, my sincere if culinary incompetent receptionist, at the doorway. She was carrying a pan that was quite clearly carrying something that had caught fire, and was sporting a look of wild-eyed panic. We almost clashed, but luckily my training in classical quick-step enabled me to nimbly step to one side. Denise rushed down the corridor arms outstretched. I followed, yelling at her to put the pan down. Either she couldn't hear me, or else she was too scared to let go, but either way she took herself and the pan out of the Institute and threw it into the field. I followed with a fire-extinguisher and a few moments later the pan was made safe. 'What happened?' I asked once the fire was out.

    'I'm so sorry Dr McCrumble,' said Denise, her face blackened and tear-streaked, 'I was cooking some chips and reading a book but I dropped the book in the pan 'cos my hands were slippery after dunking the chips in the oil and some of the hot oil jumped out and the pan caught fire.'

    'You dunked your hands in hot oil?' I asked, surprised at my receptionists apparent ability to withstand the scalding temperature.

    'No, no Dr McCrumble.' I dunked the chips in when the oil was cold then lit the stove then went to get the book. When I got back the oil was bubbling very fierce and giving off some smoke so I knew the chips were nearly ready. I looked into the pan and some oil jumped out and hurt my arm, which made me drop the book, which started the fire. I hope I didn't cause any damage...'

    'I'm sure your prompt action saved the day, Denise. Go inside and clean yourself up. I'll deal with the pan.'

    Denise ran back into the Institute whilst I tended the pan. Lifting it up, I could just make out what book was inside. Half expecting it to be my book-of-the-blog (Denise has read it ten times, apparently), I was mildly surprised to see it was a copy of Jamie Oliver's best-selling tome entitled 'My guide to making you a better cook'.

    It took me an hour to clean up the mess, by which time SK had finished. Dolores returned from her shopping spree just as I was finished. She took one look at me scrubbing the worktop and declared that she was 'profoundly moved' by my attempt to integrate with the domestic side of life.


    J McC

    P.S. It just so happens, and by complete co-incidence, that the royalties from mine and Mr Oliver's books are headed for worthy causes. In Mr Oliver's case, he is helping children in this country to become chefs. In my case, I'm helping children in Africa to a sustainable source of safe water.

  91. At 08:25 PM on 17 Dec 2006, Gaby wrote:

    I think that I love Teddy Sheringham. I think, therefore I do.

  92. At 08:15 AM on 18 Dec 2006, Jane wrote:

    Hello Chris

    I've been waiting for the latest podcast to update in my itunes, and its STILL not there! I usually listen to you in the gym but as you've not updated yet I'll have to do without. Boo hoo.

    Is my computer broken or is your podcast broken? Hurry up and fix it, I miss you!

    By the way why can't I download a whole show onto my ipod. Is it to do with copyrights on the tunes you play? bummer.

    Bye for now, off to the gym without you....xx

    oh, and how crap are we at cricket! Am currently living in Australia and I think my colleagues are going to give me hell tomorrow!

  93. At 08:28 AM on 18 Dec 2006, moose wrote:

    Don't we all!!!!!
    C'mon you IRONS!

  94. At 04:20 PM on 05 Jan 2007, snodgrass wrote:


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