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Ginn Fourie- Forgiving my daughter's killers | |||||||||||||
Lyndi Fourie was 23 when she died, shot dead in what became known as the Heidelberg Tavern Massacre in Cape Town, South Africa. Lyndi’s mother forgave the men who carried out the shooting (they were jailed for an average of 25 years) and she forgave Letlapa Mphahlele, who masterminded the shooting. Ginn and Letlapa spoke to Heather Payton about their experiences Ginn started by telling Heather that her daughter was tall, very vivacious and loved the outdoors. She was undertaking a Civil Engineering Degree when she was killed. Initially Ginn could never have imagined forgiving her daughter's killers. But at the trial of the three men involved she did forgive them when she realised the futility of harbouring revenge: "I define forgiveness...as a process in which you give up your justifiable right to revenge.” Ginn came into contact with Letlapa when she heard that he was undertaking a press launch for the release of his book. Ginn immediately went to see Letlapa; she wanted to talk to the person responsible for giving the orders that resulted in her daughter's death. Recollecting that anger made her speak, Ginn says that she stood up, said who she was and asked whether Letlapa had trivialised the Truth and Reconciliation Commission by not participating Letlapa Mphahlele told Heather Payton that it was un-nerving to hear Ginn. He was prepared to answer calls from journalists- but not someone who had lost so much. Letlapa's answer explianed why he thought the Truth and Reconcilliation Commission had "trivialised the struggle". The reply to her question made Ginn feel that, rather than being a monster, Letlapa had a huge integrity and was a very intelligent person. It was a huge leap from her prior feelings. After the press conference Letlapa said that he wanted to meet with Ginn. Of this moment Ginn said: “I saw the remorse in his eyes and in his body language and it was hugely moving.” When they met up Ginn apologised for what her British ancestors had done in terms of slavery, colonisation in SA and of course ‘the dreaded apartheid’. Ginn also acknowledged her and her families support for the systems that marginalise black and poor people; for example, education, medicine and justice. Ginn’s believes that her forgiveness has helped her getting over death of her daughter. "There is still sadness and loss- but the hate and anger I’m completely free of and that's a huge move in the process of forgiveness and acceptance." Letlapa believe that they are friends ‘and comrades’. Ginn added “I actually consider Letlapa a brother, in the context that Martin Luther King, Jr said, we’re either going to learn to live together as brothers or die together as fools.” | ||||||||||||||
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