Channel 4: Big Brother

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Well I can't believe it!!! (I know, I've gone all Victor Meldrew)

Our Melinda didn't win it - if you ask me I think it was rigged.

Maybe it was that dodgy stripey top/jacket combo or more likely the whole Darth Vader thing (see I TOLD you that Goldie was trouble!)

I'm shocked and stunned that she didn't even beat loony Les - my survey says UH-UH. Well done to little Monkey Mark for winning (does that sound like I mean it?

Because I'm saying it through gritted teeth) it was obviously the support of all those closet Take That fans from way back.

Highlights for me....the 80's clothes, Monkey Mark on the assault course looking suspiciously like an orang-utan, Loopy Les's mental instability and of course Melinda's teeth (they're sooooo white and they took on a starring role all of their own!!)

And it ended much as it began with the baying crowd and an overexcited Davina McCall...come on Billie Piper, or perhaps Julian Clarey... get your applications in for next year and we'll do it all again in 2003!!!

Rachael Hodges

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