How your children are educated about sex will have a powerful impact on their attitudes. Parents can make an important contribution to children's understanding of sex and relationships, so it's not just down to the school: be brave!

Who should do the talking?
Research shows that children and young people want to receive their first education about sex and relationships not from their school, but from their parents and families. School and other adults (school nurses, doctors etc) can build on this later.

But many parents and carers find it difficult to talk to their children about sex and relationships. Fathers, in particular, find it difficult to talk to their sons.

Why parents are so important
Parents/carers are the key people in:

• teaching their children about sex and relationships
• maintaining the culture and ethos of the family
• helping their children cope with the emotional and physical aspects of growing up
• preparing them for the challenges and responsibilities of life.

Because you provide the most secure environment, children will feel 'safest' in learning the 'facts of life' from you, and you can help them see where sex fits in to the process of growing up and forming relationships.

How to talk about it

You may find it difficult to talk about, for example, the correct names for parts of the body, feelings and relationships, or to answer questions about growing up, having babies, feeling attraction, sexuality, contraception, relationships and sexual health.

The main thing is to be truthful and clear, and not to make assumptions about how much your child may know - it's an area where all sorts of misconceptions can very easily develop, especially when children have heard things from their peers.

There are lots of sources of support to help you find the right words. For example, your doctor's surgery, local health clinic or social services department may provide leaflets by organisations such as the Family Planning Association (FPA) with information for parents and young people. Your local library may also carry leaflets and books on the subject.

Useful websites:
These sites can help parents to find out more.

For no frills information on everything from puberty to teenage pregnancy, log on to www.likeitis.org.uk

For practical advice on how to talk to your child about tough issues such as sex and drugs, log on to www.talkingwithkids.org

School sex education
Your child's school will have a policy on sex education - what's taught at what age etc, and you can ask them to supply you with a copy. Schools need to work closely with parents to ensure their sex education complements your role as a parent.

If you prefer that your child doesn't take part in school sex education, you have the right to withdraw your children from all or part of the sex education programme - except for those parts included in the National Curriculum.

The BBC is not responsible for the content of external internet sites