your comments
Marylin, Finland
I'm 13 and my daughter is 4 months old. I got pregnant when I was 12. About two months before I had done an abortion. Many people say i'm a slut or bitch. I don't think so. Yeah, sure I've had many boys since I was 10 yr old but I don't sell myself. Vanessa's father is 17. When we dated he didn't know how old I am. I told him I was 15. So don't blame him, at first he thought that I'm 21 so... When my parents found out they insisted me to have an abortion, because I had a great career coming. But I wanted to keep my baby and I don't regret anything. Though at school it was hard at the beginning. My classmates and almost all school knew about my pregnancy. They were mean but now it all is OK. Sometimes Vanessa comes to school with me, but mostly my mum babysits her while im at school. When I go out with my friends I take Vanessa with me. At first it was very hard but now I can't imagine life without her. She's the best thing ever happened to me!
Thu Sep 18 13:58:40 2008
Bathusi, Sowa
The subject of teen mothers is really worrisome. They should first concentrate on their schooling rather than engage in sexual relationships.
Wed Sep 3 08:57:20 2008
Laura, Aberdare
I was 15 years old when I had my twin boys. They are now 8 years old. I am very proud of myself for what I have achieved. I own my own home, I am still with my sons' father after nearly nine years. I also have another son who is 2 years old. I get really annoyed when people slag young mums off. You always see young mums on TV who have done a bad job being a teenage mam - they never show the ones that are good mums abd that really annoys me.
Tue Jul 22 08:42:03 2008
Latasha
What upsets me is that women put themselves through all this worthless meaningless suffering when abortion could liberate them. It smacks of the horrors women endure and baby making machines with no choice in pre-femenist times.
Wed Jul 9 15:10:35 2008
Emily, South Yorkshire
I fell pregnant when I was 18 with my partner of 2 years. We have stuck by eachother and have now been together for nearly 6 years. We have a beautiful 2 year old boy, he's happy, healthy, fed, clothed, he wants for nothing and is extremely well looked after. I'm well educated and have a brilliant paying job which is more than enough to support my family. We love being parents so much we have another due this September! You may call us stupid and that we're wasting our lives but the way we see it is that our children are our lives. There's plenty of time to do studies or have a life after kids, it's not the be all and end all it's the beginning and I find myself to be better off and more fullfilled than parents scrounging the government for benefits.
Tue Jun 10 08:25:52 2008
Kat
I'm a teen (I'm 14) mum, I got pregnant at 13 and had her at 14 and without blowing my own trumpet I think I'm very capable of looking after her. Like any new mum I was constantly worried I was doing something wrong but my lil princess could not be loved any more than she is. I was in labour for 29 and a 1/2 hours and she's worth every minute xxx
Mon Jun 2 09:13:03 2008
JoJo
Teenagers are just as capable of raising a child as anyone else. After all, those who are supposed to be mature enough to have children can't always do a decent job of it. And yes, some teenage mothers do make a hash of it, but at the end of the day we're all only human and being a parent doesn't come with a handbook. You kinda have to make the rules up as you go along. Any young woman who brings up a child deserves a lot of respect, especially if their child is being brought up properly, as I'm sure most are. However, with that said, they should have been more careful, like a lot of us I guess. I'm 37 weeks with an unplanned pregnancy and luckily for me, the father is happy about it and is still around. Young fathers are not all that interested and this makes things 10 times harder on the young mum. My one piece of advice for teen mums: use contraception. That goes for older mums too.
Thu May 29 09:02:55 2008
SexyMe from Wrexham
At the end of the day, abortion (whether good or evil) is/or should be the MOTHER'S CHOICE!
Tue May 20 07:26:29 2008
Lea
I'm 16, employed, have a secure long term relationship and just found out I am pregnant! And it feels like a blessing! I couldn't ever "get rid" of something so precious and wonderful. Abortion is an issue I have felt very strongly about since I first learnt about it. It is morally wrong just like other issues such as euthanasia and no rights for fathers. Children are miracles and should be embraced by the mother and family no matter what her age is.
Web Team: Tomorrow MPs vote on cutting the 24-week abortion limit
Mon May 19 08:12:49 2008
M, Wales
I agree with probably everything that Steve has to say. Young mums think they're clever for going back for their GCSEs. I admire them for that, but you should never have left in the first place! I'm 13, and have already vowed that I'm not going to seriously plan for a baby until I'm at least 24 and am in a steady relationship or even married. I'm not even going to lose my virginity until I'm sure that I'm with the person I want to lose it with. I've got so many plans for my life when I leave school, and although it sounds awful, until I'm settled in a good job and relationship, a baby would complicate things.
Wed May 14 08:52:12 2008
Kelly
It's hard I know but I am 15 and pregnant. I'm happy. I wanna little boy but my ex don't want anythink to do with it. Yeah, it will be hard but, hey, life is always hard. Us young mums have to thank people for our beautiful babies.
Mon Apr 28 15:23:59 2008
Holly from Hull
Teen mums can make just as good mums as ones in their 20s, 30s, etc. Just because they are young doesn't mean they don't have the ability to love and nurture their child. People who say they are bad mums are narrow-minded, ignorant and obviously believe everything all the sensationalist stuff they read.
Wed Apr 16 09:16:56 2008
Rachel from Liverpool
i am 16 years old and doing my GCSEs and I am 7 months pregnant with a baby boy. I think it is horrible the way people see us as a disgrace, they look down at us because we are young and we are having babies, they assume that we will be bad mums because of our age. I am mature for my age, everyone says 'how can you be mature if you ended up pregnant', well because we all make mistakes, all of us! I chose to keep my baby because I couldn't go through with an abortion or adoption. To me keeping the baby is the best decision because he gave me the reason to want to carry on in school and go to college and make something of myself.
Thu Apr 10 14:02:33 2008
Char, Essex
Hi, I'd just like to say that teen mums are just as good mums as a 40 year old, despite what people say. I'm a teen mum myself, I had my little girl when I was just 15, in the middle of my GCSEs. I had to go back a week after giving birth to sit them. At 4 months I found out my little girl had eyesight trouble, and after that found out that she has a development delay and she still isn't able to crawl or walk yet and she is 3 years of age. We see so many doctors etc...still only being 18 it is hard work, however I finished school, and went on to college for 2 years. So life does go on, things have worked out well for me and I hope it does for any other teen parent out there.
Thu Apr 3 10:15:22 2008
Bel, Bristol
I'd just like to say that I really admire teenage mums. My mum was one and I can't imagine how she did it; I'm not sure I could have coped so well.One thing though...please please please please please pretty please breastfeed for the first 6 months at the very least! It is so incredibly important.
Mon Mar 17 17:00:47 2008
Katie, the middle of nowhere
Hiya people, I'm 15 and found out I was pregnant only 3 weeks ago, I hadn't told my boyfriend at the time and it was proving difficult keeping this secret so I explained to him that I was pregnant but he accused me of cheating because we had not been sleeping together for 3 weeks bfore that! His ex is living in his house, causing me to look like a push over because when she wants to start a fight I won't 'cause all I want to do is protect my unborn child. Do you think this is fair? I don't! I don't want my baby growing up in a violent environment so I have told him me or her. He says me but is that a true answer or is this because I am carrying his child?
Wed Mar 12 16:32:16 2008
Zoe
I think that as long as you can take care of your child and give it the love and the care that it needs then why not have teen mums. Just because they are teenagers does not mean that they can't look after them. However, I do believe that the father should not sponge off the government because if they are unwilling to wear a condom then I believe they should live up to their responsibilities and not sponge.
Mon Mar 3 08:09:27 2008
KK
I belive being a young mother is your choice. I don't think anyone can take that away. It's our responsibility and your loss or gain or your choice - not everyone else's. Abortion is not of everyone and I don't support it one bit. It's taking a life no matter what ppl say.. it's wrong... I say to all the teen mothers keep going strong!
Fri Feb 29 07:42:19 2008
Tanya
There are so many older mums dads and older people that are put in a position of trust - e.g. the kids home in Jersey. Until you have been in a situation of a teen parent you cannot possibly give comment.
Fri Feb 29 07:37:40 2008
Katie Wrexham
N: I totally disagree with what you said and it's people that say things like that put pressure on young mums. I do think that every child should be planned but this is the real world. What would you say to a 30 year old woman if she got pregnant and it wasn't planned? Would you say she should have an abortion? Probably not because she is older, and in my opinion that is wrong.
Wed Feb 27 09:08:04 2008
April from Gorton, Manchester
Im 16 and I have an 18 month old little girl called Kizzy and I am 7 and a half months pregnant with a boy who I'm going to call Blake. I think everyone is entitled to their own opinions but not all teen mums are the stereotype people think they are. Age is just a number and whether it is a planned or unplanned pregnancy you can't judge a person by their age as it's got nothing to do with it. So before people can pass judgement on "Teen Mums" in general, they should have a day in the life of the person they are criticising and see what they are really like with their kids. I'm not saying that all teen mums are fit to be parents because I know that is not true as I have witnessed it first hand but all I know is that if someone tries to criticise my parenting skills I'd be fuming because I've done everything I possibly can to give my daughter the best start in life she could have and I'll do the same for my little boy, I love them both to pieces.
Tue Feb 26 09:35:03 2008
Tanya
Reply to N. Abortion may be scientific but it is a social problem and pregnancy is caused by social factors. Yes, you're right, every pregnancy should be planned in a perfect world, but this world is far from perfect, it is the human nature to make mistakes. Teenagers have in the past and will continue in the future to get pregnant. Abortion is not an easy choice and you should think about it fully. Like I said, many teens can become good parents. Teens in their minority do not have a baby "for the sake of it". I have conducted a lot of reaserch into this. I am not against abortion I know that in some cases it is the "right" thing to do but teens are influenced a lot and put under a lot of pressure from today's society. Like I said, teen parents need support, guidance and encouragement.
Fri Feb 22 10:47:23 2008
Kerri, Manchester
I've just found out I'm pregnant at 16. I don't think that people realise that teen mums can be just as good mum to their child as an older mother, even better as younger mothers know what is going on in the modern world today and can give accurate advice that maybe an older mam couldn't. I have not even considered abortion. I am definitely keeping my baby no matter what even if my family disown me (which they probably will). At the end of the day it is the mother's decision and NO ONE should have the right to tell someone what to do, even your parents. I know a few people who have had abortions and have regretted it the minute after. I am totally pro-choice however I would say think long and hard about your decision to have an abortion because you will never be able to bring that life back into the world, and it will never be replaced not even with another child. I am worried about what my parents will say but I have supportive friends and supportive siblings who also had children at 16 (3 sisters to be exact). Just think what would be best for yourself and baby and don't let anyone else impact your decision. Best of luck.
Mon Feb 18 10:36:53 2008
N
To Tanya. Abortion is a scientific issue. I understand the teen mothers' point of view, I just think teenagers should have an abortion because why should you have a child for the sake of it? Every child should be planned fully - not accepted.
Tue Feb 12 08:53:21 2008
S
I'll be 17 when my baby arrives. I don't smoke, I don't drink, I always tried hard at school and I like to think I am a good person. When I fell pregnant I'd just got into college, but when I told the college I was pregnant I was asked to leave instead of being given support. Being young, very scared with everything to lose I can see why so many teen pregnancies end in abortion. I feel it's encouraged, as people with professional opinions kept telling me to "get rid" of my baby. Teachers, doctors, young people's advisers. The nurse who did my pregnancy test actually booked an appointment at a abortion clinic. Teen pregnancies should not be encouraged but does that mean abortion should?
Mon Jan 28 08:09:16 2008
Sarah
I had my daughter at 19. She was born 14 weeks early and at 6 years old was diagnosed with high functioning autism. I am a single mother. I have just completed a university degree and am going on to do post-graduate studies to get my teaching qualifications. My parents have been supportive for the most part. I don't think that society gives mothers in general enough credit for the job they do. But when mothers turn on mothers, old against young, young against old etc. I think that it just makes our lives all that much more difficult. Nobody is perfect and not one of us, young or old, will raise a perfect child or not make mistakes along the way. Yes, young mums do it tough. We are judged very harshly by society, and we are often guilty and ashamed of ourselves for the situation we find ourselves in. We sacrifice a lot to raise our children to the best of our abilities - most of the time we do just as good a job as an older mother. Older mothers are not guaranteed to be maternal or be brilliant at raising their children. Age doesn't always bring with it the wisdom and coping skills necessary to raise a child. Young mums need understanding and support. You don't need to condone under-age sex and teenage pregnancy, but the fact remains that there have always been young mums, and there will always be young mums.
Mon Jan 21 09:55:38 2008
Sian from Wrexham
Hi Katie how are you and and Caitlin doing and how is Les and Ali? Congratulations hun hope you're all OK and hope to see you all soon too. Long time no see what you been doing with yourself? I thought it would be nice to look back at this and I have enjoyed reading all the stories. I got pregnant at 15 and wouldn't look back, my son is 2 and a half now. Hope everyone at Cyfle are all well.
Mon Jan 14 09:50:46 2008
Kirsty, Sheffield
I had my daughter at 16 and it was the best day of my life. I am studying at college to get a good job to support my daughter, even thought it was the best day of my life I would still tell other teenagers to wait before they have kids and people should stop making out that young mums are bad mothers because they're not and young mums have feelings as well and don't need people making them feel like bad mothers.
Mon Jan 14 09:38:30 2008
Chanin Peeke
I think when accepting that you're going to be a mother at a very young age no one should bring a child into the world if it is not loved, money doesn't buy happiness and love. If you can give that to a child then you're a fit mother.
Wed Jan 9 10:28:16 2008
Katie, Wrexham
Tanya, Chester: You are totally right. There are some small minded people in this world.
Wed Jan 9 10:01:32 2008
Tanya, Chester
Response to Nebekha. That attitude to abortion has completely disgusted me, science has no way of making a choice about having an abortion. Who defines what a life is? A foetus is a living organism whichever way you look at it and it relies on its mother for protection and survival, yes abortion is a personal choice but it has to be thought through fully. I am a young parent (23). I have a son who is 3 I also work with young parents and many of them do a fantastic job. Many young mums do not get pregnant to get benefits, get housing, becuase they simply lack the knowledge to make such an informed choice. What needs to be changed is sex education in schools and the way society sees young parents as a whole. Although many young mums or dads are on benefits in the early years a lot of them go on to study at college and/or uni and become succesful doctors, lawyers, social workers and many other things. I am living proof of this as I myself am training to be a social worker. So well done to all those young parents out there it takes courage, determination and great strengh to overcome the negative views of our society today. I am proud of being a young mum!
Tue Jan 8 10:28:47 2008
Aimee from Chester
I'm a 20 year old mum of 3. I had identical twin daughters born 12 weeks premature when I was 17. I then went on to have a 3rd daughter 18 months later. Being a young mum is hard enough as it is without all the extra stress of dealing with negativity from others. Young mums can be good mums too. Yes ok, some of us maybe on benefits, but we are staying at home with our children. Some of us go to college so we can get a job which pays better so that we can come off benefits, some of us already have jobs. Everyone is different, age doesn't come into it. I know plenty of older mothers on benefits but that is swept under the rug. What about the people who CAN work who just can't be bothered, the ones on JSA? I know plenty of them too. Ones who just say 'oh, I don't fancy that job, lets just have another 2 weeks on benefit'. They are the ones that people should focus on. I wouldn't call being a mother the 'easy life.' It's far from.
Mon Dec 31 09:22:50 2007
Nebekha
In my opinion to best way to deal with teen pregnancy is abortion. I looked into the scientific evidence and it is not taking life, so why avoid it when it is probably the best option?
Fri Dec 21 08:21:49 2007
Sue
Teen pregnancies happen and have been happening since medieval days the only difference is that people are now more aware of them as teens are know keeping their children instead of being whisked away to an aunty's somewhere in Scotland then coming back or the parents bringing them up as their own. At the end of the day who are we to say what is right or wrong as long as the child is loved and kept then let them be. As for contraception, how may time have you heard from adults, 'Oh, the condom must have split' or 'I forgot to take the pill'. No one says anything about this. There are so many unwanted children by these people, at least some teens do take responsibility for their actions where as some adults don't. I wish you all luck who have children in their teens but please do not make the same mistake twice. Teach your children the sex education you never had.
Wed Dec 19 09:11:59 2007
Steve, Newport
PJ Salford I would like to take issue with part of your post. I think in the U.K. we do have sex education at the earliest possible age. I do think part of the problem is since we are a multi cultural country too many parents exercise their right to remove their children from sex education classes. I don't for one minute think this would stop all teenage pregnancies but it might help to curb them.
Tue Dec 18 08:23:39 2007
PJ from Salford
Isn't it Holland where sex education starts in what would be called primary school? And isn't it Holland that has a lower rate of teen pregnancy? And isn't it parents who are worried about teen pregnancy who want to stop the government teaching sexual education at a younger age? If you're going to complain about teen pregnancy, you need to ENCOURAGE the government to have it taught earlier.
Tue Dec 11 08:23:36 2007
Katie, Wrexham
Jade, Manchester: You sound like you are a great mum your baby girl is very lucky. More fool your dad he is the one missing out. I totally agree with you about the waiting till you're older thing. Good luck hunny. Allanah: Hiya hunny, yes we are both great thanks Caitlyn in playgroup 2 days a week 9 till 1 and loves it. How are you, Lee, Leighton and bump? Hope to see you soon.
Tue Nov 27 09:22:37 2007
Allanah from Wrexham
Good luck 2 all the girls out there who are young and pregnant or have had a baby at a young age. I am pregnant with my third child and I'm very happy. It's VERY HARD WORK bringing up a baby but they are DEFINITELY WORTH IT! I wouldn't change them for the world! My little boys are absolutely great, my oldest (Lee) is in nursery and he loves it, he is 3 and my other little boy Leighton is 9 and a half months and has just started walking! I would NEVER advise a young girl 2 get pregnant it ISN'T all nicey nicey! Some girls think they just sleep all day and you can dress them up in pretty little clothes but that is NOT reality! Think before you have unprotected sex! I know I'm not a good one to talk but the main thing is I'm happy but motherhood just isn't for some girls. I have got a lot of support from mine and my partner's family, thankfully! N while I'm here BIG hiya to KATIE FROM WREXHAM! Hope u n Caitlyn r ok chuck! Hope I'll c ya soon.
Thu Nov 22 09:12:06 2007
Steve, Newport
I for one appreciate you being so candid Jade (Manchester). I sincerely hope things work out for you.
Wed Nov 21 12:27:41 2007
Jade from Manchester
I'm 16 but fell pregnant when I was 15. I now have a beautiful daughter called Demi-leigh who I love with all my heart. I told my mum and dad and they hit the roof. I don't really see any of them as my mum moved abroad and my dad is too ashamed. I get a bit of help off my aunty and friends but the baby's dad doesn't care. I live in a flat and it's very very hard. No matter how much I love my daughter I wish I would have had her when I was older. I really thought I was in love with the baby's dad and I thought he loved me but all he wanted was sex. All you girls who come on here saying you want a baby you really should wait until you're older and live your life. I would love to go out with my friends and have a few drinks like I used to but I can't now as my baby comes first no matter what. Seriously live your life first b4 u think of having a baby or just use protection. If the boy has no condom then don't sleep with him, simple. I wish I could have done that even though I love my daughter.
Wed Nov 21 09:20:55 2007
Lyn from Bristol
Hi everyone, I have read lots of your comments and I would just like to say that I was a teenaged mum. I had my daughter at 17, I am now 51 with three children, my eldest is 33 then another daughter 23 and a son 20. I work with children and young mothers and this subject is very dear to my heart as I agree with a lot of the comment about age not being relevant to how good or bad a mother is. It is and always be hard parenting no matter what age you are. My niece is 20 and she has three children aged two, one and seven months. She is a fantastic mother as the majority of the mothers that have written to this page. Everyone to their own opinion, there is support out there for all parents. When I had my daughter in 1974 I was treated badly, I had to struggle to keep her and we went through some bad times but I never regret having her or my other children (never married), split with long term partner. There is also life after children. I have gone back to college having left school with no qualifications completed my nursery nurse training, health care training, NVQ4 business management and I am now doing my degree in early years. Having said this there are issues regarding age, under 15 is poor and I agree there should be more sex education at schools and colleges. Anyway, those of you that are young mums good luck to you and never say never - you can achieve anything if you have a dream or ambition.
Tue Nov 20 09:07:45 2007
Jo Waldrum, Loughborough
Hi, my name is Jo and I work at a college in the East Midlands. We have the opportunity to put together a young mums group to help them feel positive about learning - something school may have failed to do! I would like the ideas and opinions from young mums how colleges can help you make decisions that will encourage you back to learning. What would you like to do if you were given this opportunity? Many thanks if you reply, I will really appreciate your thoughts. Jo
Thu Nov 15 08:52:16 2007
Alana
I'm 18 and have 2 children. People used 2 slag me off coz I was only 15 when I got pregnant but now most of them have got kids!
Mon Nov 5 08:05:02 2007
Katie, Wrexham
Cristy: Hiya, first things first if you want to keep this baby don't let anyone tell you otherwise. In my opinion you should tell her straight away. I didn't tell my parents and regret it so much. She might be disappointed but that's only because she loves you. You need someone to help you through this. Good luck in whatever you decide to do.
Fri Nov 2 10:20:57 2007
Steve, Newport
Katie, Wrexham, I agree with you, yes if a female is pregnant I would agree there is nothing wrong in having the baby regardless of the age of the potential mother. However there is an Age of Consent that must be adhered to and there must be greater education to girls of 16+.
Fri Nov 2 09:54:00 2007
Katie, Wrexham
Steve: thank you. I suppose I act like an adult because I can see it from both sides, I totally appreciate everything people say on this site. The other teen mums in my opinion do need to hold their hands up and admit that having sex at such a young age is wrong. What I don't see wrong is bringing a beautiful baby in the world and loving it like any person would.
Tue Oct 30 09:47:11 2007
Cristy, Spain
Hello I'm 18 and pregnant. I want to have this baby but I'm scared of what my mum might say please help. How do I tell her? Please kisses.
Mon Oct 29 14:24:32 2007
Steve, Newport
Katie, Wrexham, firstly I appreciate your honesty and I would say you are the first on this site to actually, in my opinion, entered the debate like an adult.
Wed Oct 24 08:57:23 2007
Katie, Wrexham
Steve; I can't really say anything about that comment because it's right. I was under age and very foolish to have a sexual relationship when I was 14, the only thing that I'm saying is that I did have sex but I did think about contraception first.
Tue Oct 23 08:27:42 2007
Steve, Newport
Katie why should anyone tell you that the Pill won't work if you take other medication? By your own admission you were 14 at the time in other words below the Age of Consent. It is certainly not the medical profession's fault for not telling you. No those of us who are not in favour of teenage pregnancies are not "dissing" teenage mums. What is being commented is if under 16 it is illegal if over 16 but under 18 extremely foolish.
Fri Oct 19 14:26:07 2007
Natalie, Wrexham
It really annoys me when people diss teenage mums saying that they can't give a child what they need! My sister had a baby at the age of 15 and my little niece who is now two doesn't want for nothing, is loved soo much and has a stable family! It also annoys me when they call teenage mums slags! No they just got unlucky. And when they have their babies it's the best thing that could happen to them! Good luck to all the mumz out there that are young and to the people that have nothing better to do than watch every teenage mum to look for mistakes it's about time you concentrated on your own lives!
Wed Oct 17 14:05:13 2007
Katie, Wrexham
Kelly: I was on the pill when I fell pregnant. The reason I got pregnant was coz I was taking other medication. No one told me that the pill would not work if I used other medicens, that's why I didn't think that I could possibly be pregnant. So I not that stupid am I.
Tue Oct 16 11:46:59 2007
Rachel from Valleys
Hello everyone, I have read all the comments made, by everyone and as we can see everyone had different views, and opinions. Which is brilliant, because everyone is different, and should be treated as an individual. I think that is is excellent if you are bringing up your child, to your best ability and do what you can for them, well done Mums and Dads! You must always remember also, that there are services out there for you to use, there are places such as Sure Start and loads of other services for you to use to help you through those good and bad days, Which we ALL have! Girls do you think that if you had better Sex Education within school, or you could have spoken about it more within the home, that you would have been more aware of the situation? Congratulations, and Good Luck!
Tue Oct 2 12:23:11 2007
Veronica, United States
I think that it is a brave thing to have to fall into the role of motherhood. It takes a lot of guts to not abort a baby and take responsibility for the baby. It takes a lot of determination too at a young age to be determined to raise another life, to be a fit human being in human soceity. Allthough I do not condone someone having a baby just for benefits, I do think that any mother who is a teen mother deserves congrats because it takes a lot to be able to pull the job of being a mother off.
Mon Sep 24 09:31:37 2007
Laura
I can't believe how nasty older women can be about teen mums! I'M NEARLY 17 MY BABY'S DUE MARCH ! What is the difference? My middwife says nowadays most young mums end up being better mums than older women. Get on with yur lifes and stop slaggin off young mums.
Tue Sep 18 14:40:25 2007
Kelly
I'm sorry, but girls who are saying 'it wasn't planned' or 'it just happened' or 'I didn't want to get pregnant' are actually 100% stupid!Everyone knows that if you don't use protection when you have sex, you will get pregnant! And even if you don't use a condom there is still the after morning pill as well. There are so many different forms of protection these days that there is no excuse for getting pregnant unless you WANT to!If you're going to start being sexually active go on the pill and always use a condom - that way you won't get pregnant and you won't catch anything!
Mon Sep 17 09:31:19 2007
Katie, Wrexham
Hiya, I was 14 when I found out I was pregnant. I kept it from my parents till I was 34 weeks pregnant. Not long after I told them I had my beautiful little angel. I stayed in education as I went to Cyfle. I can understand some of people's frustrations as I know that some teenage mums are not good parents but that goes for some older mums too. It's those parents that are not too good that give people like me a bad name. I still live at home with my parents and still have the support of my long term boyfriend (baby's dad). I have always worked for my money until recently when a lack of affordable childcare which meant it was impossible for me to work but do not claim benefits. My daughter Caitlyn is loved and cared for exactly how any other parents would regardless of age. I try my hardest to give her everything I can and she never goes without. My baby is the most special thing in my life and no one can ever take that away from me. I just think it's about time people stopped judging young mums as we are the same and as good as any other parents and even better than a lot of older mums.
Tue Sep 4 10:03:08 2007
Alison from Portsmouth
I'm 17 years old, I just found out I am pregnant. 2 things ran through my mind and still are, what am I going to do with my life and what about my parents? I've always said I would abort and not carry on with this child but most people teenage or in their 30s when you have something living inside you, that close to you sharing your food and living off of your body you can't get rid of it. I'm not and I won't get rid of it. I disagree with the girl who said GCSEs aren't important. That is rubbish. I'm not going to college I was never going to go college so with a child on the way GCSEs and other bits in my career and education are all I have to rely on. I agree with another comment on here that you can be a bad mother no matter how old you are and yes it does rely on the person who is bringing that child up. Me and my partner are both in good well paid jobs. My parents probably won't be happy or supportive but my partners family is.
Mon Sep 3 10:31:23 2007
ALLANAH
Hiya ppl! Hope every1 is OK. Me n my 2 sons r doin great! STEVE FROM NEWPORT, see ya stil on ere tellin us that it is illegal 2 have sex underage. I'm 17 n iv got a little boy called Lee, he has turned 3 n another little boy called leighton n he is 7months n I do a GREAT job looking after them! Even tho I'm only young I can do a better job than some mothers out there that are in their 30s n I am a single mum, now that me and their dad have broke up. Hope every1 in Cyfle is well! u were all great n stil r. hope 2 c ya all soon! Good luck 2 the girls that r in Cyfle!
Mon Sep 3 08:52:07 2007
Steve, Newport
I must be one of the oldest and presumably the only male that comments on this site. I find it very refreshing that at last older mums are comming on here and telling youngsters life isn't a bed of roses when you have a child. I agree with "Nat, Leeds", especially the last sentence in text speak (Aug 10). I am also totally dismayed at the posting on Aug 7 titled Princess in my own little world. How anyone can say GCSEs aren't important beggars belief. Mind you if you are in your own little world it may be different, on the other hand you are not, you are in this world as hard and as ugly as it is.
Fri Aug 24 13:09:41 2007
Leeanne, Oswestry
Everyone's circumstances are different! You can be a rubbish teenage mum BUT you can be a rubbish mother who is in their 20s to 30s to 40s, it's all about individuals! I was 17 when I fell pregnant with my daughter, now I'm 21, 22 soon and I am still with my partner Macy's dad. We've been together nearly 7 years now and we both work full time and are just about to finalise our 1st mortgage on a lovely house after renting for 3 years. In my situation the hardest bit was my relationship with my partner, I didn't want to be a single mum at 17 so we worked through it and now we are all very, very happy! So not all teenage mums are hopeless! And I also know of many older mums that are completely hopeless so if you ask me it's the individuals not the age.
Thu Aug 23 11:31:32 2007
Sarah
I had Jacob when I was 15. He's now 6 months old. I stayed at school till I was 39 weeks pregnant. I then returned to do my exams when he was 2 months old. I am now doing highers part time. I think it's really hard going to a normal school because I think sometimes they forget I have a baby and expect me to be as organised and stuff as everyone else. I pride myself on being a good mother, I'm not a "slut" or "scum". I breast fed Jacob till he was 2 and a half months old. I wish I could have done it longer but returning to school made my milk run out :( I'm with Jacob whenever I can be and never leave him with his grandparents, only when I'm at school. I go swimming with him once a week and take him to baby massage classes. I understand some teenage mums aren't good mothers, but some are.
Mon Aug 20 10:33:14 2007
Helen, Bristol
I am 22. I couldn't think of anything worse than having a child at my age! I enjoy my independence too much, coming and going as I please, when I please. I have no shame in admitting I am far too selfish at this point in my life to have a child. And to prevent this from happening I have the contraceptive implant, I have also had the injection and been on the pill. I made sure once I became sexually active that I was taking appropriate precautions! My partner however does have a 5 yr old daughter who stays with us every 2 months for around three days! This sounds awful but we both breathe a sigh of relief when we hand her back. He isn't ashamed to admit he has the best of both worlds with this arrangement and I'm sure most young men would agree. Since being with my partner and becoming a 'step-mum' it's made me even more aware of how hard bringing up children is and has put me off doing it myself for at least another 5-10 years! I know of three teenage mums (my partner's daughter's mother being one) who wouldn't have been able to cope if it wasn't for the sacrifices their parents have made to help them bring up their children. I think if you're going to bring a child into this world then you should take full responsibilty for it and not rely on your parents' help finanically etc. If you can't do this then don't have a child as it isn't fair on your parents or that child! I wouldn't dream of relying on my parents for anything as they're nearing their 60s and looking forward to retirement, and actually enjoying life without the daily grind or work etc. They've reared three children into their 20s, their jobs as parents are complete!
Wed Aug 15 10:43:00 2007
Ali
I don't think being a teen mum is bad at all if you can afford your child and give it the right upbringing what's there to moan about? I also hate people that say "ooh she can't look after that baby she's a kid herself" and snide little coments like that. I think teen mums are brave to take on the experience of motherhood good luck to all you mums and carry on being the best mum ever you can as they do grow up so fast!
Mon Aug 13 11:28:32 2007
Hannah, Byren, Suffolk
Hi, I am 26 and I have 2 sons, James is 5 and Henry is 2, anyone who knows any maths can calculate that I was approx. 22 when I had my eldest son. So no, I am not a teen mum. And I also have no idea what it is like to be a teen mum, so I am in no position to lecture about the stupidity of what you have done. When I first found out I was pregnant, I was suprised yet happy. I had always wanted a child (note, not a baby) and the birth of my son was welcomed. However, when he arrived my then partner did struggle with imminent fatherhood and we split up indefinitely. After about 2 months, we then got back together and lived happily ever after. When my second son was born, yes, I was more prepared, I was more ready and I was probably a better parent. But personally, I think that is not because I was 3 years older, but I had had 3 years of parenting experience. I was expecting the sleepless nights, the overprotectiveness, and those midnight calls to the lactation consultant! I don't think that older parents are necessarily better parents, but if you are older, you have probably had more friends with kids, more money so that you can raise your child to your best ability and more importantly more life experience to tell you to trust your instincts, to believe in yourself and finally to believe that you are a great parent. My partner and I are now married, which by the way makes no difference to your parenting ability, to all those who say "wait till you're older and married"! And, now I am pregnant with our third child, a little girl, I still have those same anxieties. How do I tell my mum? What will people say? Will I be good enough? I am now an educational psychologist (yes, £44,000 a year!), and I feel that this career choice was great. I still managed to have kids and get a good job which earns enough money to care for them. I work 9.30 - 2.30 every day in the week. I work with schools, so I get summer hols and stuff. As a parent I work to a stict schedule, all those who want kids here it is: 6.15, my youngest son wakes up, toilet training! Then in the pushchair to walk the dog, we then have get dressed, washed... At 8, we eat, at 8.30 I take the dog and my two sons to school, and then we walk the dog again. I then set up dinner stuff and defrost the lasagne from the weekend and go to work. After 2.30 I pick up my youngest son from the playgroup and I take him home, he will have eaten lunch so will be keen to sleep. We then play, I walk to pick up my son from school and we all go to the park. I take them home, they play in the garden while I tidy the house, I then serve the dinner and my hubby has a bath after dinner. While he does this I play with the kids, then storytime, and bathtime. After bathtime, at about 7, my youngest son goes to bed and my older son reads him a story (badly). I clean up and then walk the dog with my eldest son. We come back, read a story and he heads to bed, 8ish. I clean, iron, wash till 9. I then have a bath, and set up my work stuff and the kids' stuff for the morning. At 10, I am asleep! I think the most important thing about being a parent is that you raise a happy, healthy child which will grow to be a responisble, caring and kind adult.
Mon Aug 13 10:53:27 2007
Nat, Leeds
This is scary! Not only the number of children raising children but the number of children who think this is OK, and even aspire to this. When I was 14, 15 and 16 I had NO idea about the world, despite thinking I was streetwise. My opinions about the world hadn't developed properly until a few years after I left university and went travelling. I am now 26 and a completely different person with a completely different attitude to when I was 16. The world is beginning to fall into place. I know who I am, what I like and dislike and what I want. These are different to the things I wanted at 16. How on earth can someone with no life experience possibly hope to pass on the benefit of their experience to their child? And, how on urth can sum1 who spels lyk this hope 2 teach their child 2 reed and rite?!!
Fri Aug 10 09:15:19 2007
Kieley from Flint
I had my daughter when I was 15 and she wasn't planned but I don't regret having her. She is the best thing that's ever happened to me and I wouldn't want to change anything about her, she a little star, but what I will say is, it can be hard work and money can get tight but as long as you give your baby all the love in the world they won't care about having lots of toys, as long as they're happy and healthy and loved that's all they need. My daughter is 2 in two months and she has got a great personality now she's very cheeky and playful, and has a temper too. I'm not with her dad as he was too interested in going out with his mates and taking drugs. My daughter doesn't see him which is his choice, and I am with someone else now and she classes him as her dad and he is great with her. To the people out there who don't like young parents, you haven't got a clue, so get on with your own lives rather than dis us coz we're just as good with a baby as any other mum. Congrats to all mums on this page and don't let anyone put you down.
Thu Aug 9 09:39:28 2007
Hollie, 20
I had my daughter at the age of 17, she wasn't planned but very wanted from the moment I found out. She is now 2 1/2 years old and the most happy little girl ever. I have great friends and family and she doesn't go without, if anything she is probably spoilt! It is hard but regardless of your age being a parent is hard. But at the end of the day it's your choice, your life and your body if people want to comment that's up to them but personally I just ignore them as they don't know me or my baby girl. Enjoy it and do whatever you can do be the best parent you can.
Tue Aug 7 13:37:45 2007
Princess in my own little world!
Hiiya! I have so much love to go out to all you single mums! I'm 15 and I can't stop thinking about having a little baby girl or boy of my own. Someone to just hold close and be proud of. I want around 7 or 8 children because I come from a gyspy family and it is one of many children. My cousin is 17 and him and my friend have had a baby who is now 5 weeks old! She's a stunning little girl and my friend says that she doesn't regret having her this young one bit. Although my cousin and mate aren't together and didn't plan on having a baby they are both so happy and wouldn't change her for the world! That feeling is something I really want and I'm finding it hard to wait. GCSE isn't something I'm really interested in even though my family think it's important, all I want is to have a family of my own. Sorry you might think this is stupid but it really is how I feel.
Tue Aug 7 10:20:07 2007
L
I think you're stupid if you want to have a baby at a young age, don't you want to make something of your life? There are contraceptives out there so you can't all say it was an accident. It's really sad when I walk down the town and there's 12 year olds pushing a pram, it's absolutely pathetic actually you should get a life and not live off benefits, get a job!
Mon Aug 6 11:12:11 2007
Jess from West Wales
I got preg at 14 and didn't even think of going ahead with the pregnancy. I regret my decision sometimes but when I look at my life now I know I made the right one. I am now 19 and have just finished my A levels which I excelled at. I'm going to uni in September and my life couldn't be better. I am still with the boy who I fell pregnant with all those years ago and one day soon we'll have our baby with peice of mind we can support it and give it every thing it needs. I don't criticse teen moms as my friend the same age has 2 beautiful boys and is a great mum. I just think if you've got the potential to do well there's plenty of time to have babies - just live a little and get a career first. xxx
Tue Jul 31 13:53:54 2007
Samii, 13
Teenage mums are very brave people, it makes me sick when people look down their noses at them. One of my friends is in foster care and her real mother is in her 40s, and my mate's brother's girlfriend had a baby when she was 14 and she is a brilliant mum. So it shows that younger mums can actually be better mums than older ones.
Mon Jul 30 08:26:41 2007
Mel
Hi, there. I'm working on a TV programme about teenage relationships and teenage mums. The film we are making will be a sensitive and indepth look at how young parents cope with the responsibilities of parenthood. I would love to talk to those of you who are teens and in relationships with children. Please get in touch with me.
Wed Jul 25 13:46:36 2007
Steve, Newport
Hi B from Newport. Go for it (the baby that is)
Thu Jul 19 14:24:10 2007
B Newport
I'm 17 years old and just found out I am pregnant. I am only 8 weeks and have told my partner of a year and my mum! They both want me to get rid of the baby but I'm not sure if I want to. I know it would probably be the right thing to do but I can't help but feel that it's my baby. I'm out of education now and work full time. I don't want to upset anyone but I don't think I want an abortion. I know its my decition but in the back of my head I guess I'm worried about the money situation. I want my child to have a great upbringing so I can give it want it needs and wants. I guess I'm a bit worried I won't be able to do that? Does anyone have an opionon? x
Wed Jul 18 13:41:49 2007
R
I am 17 years old with 3 beautiful children. I had a pair of twins when I was 13. I was raped. I had a boy and a girl.I was then 15 when I had another little boy and he is gorgeous. I am know pregnant again but love each of my children the same and would never change them as they are perfect. Good luck to all teenage mums.
Thu Jul 12 15:01:20 2007
Louise, Hertfordshire
I am 14, just found out I'm pregnant. I'm really scared cos my mum and dad will go mental cos they say you should be over 20 b4 u ave a kid so ur ready. I didn't mean 2 get pregnant it just happened. I'm not with the father it was a 1 night stand. I'm really nervous but my bessie will stick by me she said, she is the only one who knows out of all my m8s.
Fri Jul 6 09:40:46 2007
C
I am 19 years old and have a 4 month baby. My pregnancy was not planned and I am not with the father as he did not want anything to do with my baby boy. I decided for myself that I was going to keep my baby and as a result I have decided not to claim any money off the father. The only benefit that I claim off the government is Child Benefit at aprox 18 pounds a week. I was working before I fell pregnant so do get maternity pay. My parents have been very supportive and have allowed me to live with them. In September I am going to university to study radiography. All I wanted to say was it's not the end of the world having a baby young. I love my son and am going to university to ensure that I can give him everything that he needs in life and to fulfill my life also. If you're focused and determined then having a baby at a young age is a challenge but extremely rewarding and worthwhile. xxx
Mon Jul 2 08:52:09 2007
Teresa, CYFLE
To NatashaI am very sorry to hear about your situation but it sounds like you have some very supportive friends. I would strongly agree with their advice to talk to your mum. Over all my years at Cyfle I have come across many girls who have tried to hide their pregnancy from their mums. Now if you decide to terminate your pregnancy then legally you do not have to tell your mum. BUT at times of great stress most of us just want our mums to be there and speaking as a mum myself (not just a teacher) I would say that's part of our job to support you at these horrible times too. If you want to keep the baby then you will have to tell her at some point. All of the girls I've ever worked with who have hidden it from their mums have said that it got harder to tell her the longer it went on. They ALL say they wished they'd told her sooner. Either way, one thing you will learn is that being a mum is a tough job and we must always put our children first. SO take a deep breath and find some way of telling her - she will hit the roof but this is most likely because she will feel guilty about not having been able to protect the daughter she loves. Good luck!
Wed Jun 27 16:11:24 2007
Steve, Newport
Jodie, sorry but your posting on June 26th, if I could read it I would respond but I don't speak whatever language it is written in. One thing is for certain it definitely isn't English.
Tue Jun 26 14:55:29 2007
J
Not all ov us teen mums r on benifits n dnt giv care bout the babys. well certainly not me - i fell pregnant when i was 15 i am now 16 and i now have a beautiful baby girl called Demi-leigh. i love her more than anythink and she comes first no matter what. unfortunatly i am not with the father but he is still a part in her life. some people say 'well, you have thrown your life away'. maybe i have, i would not change Demi for the world but if i could i would of had her when i was abit older. i became pregnant because i slept with a boy when i was drunk. these things happen though and there is nothing anybody can do about it. gd luk 2 all tha teen mums out there.
Tue Jun 26 08:44:16 2007
kayley
most of these girls on ere are decent and seem too be lookin after there babies but that last comment was ridiculos. i am a teen mother and thats the sort of people that makes us look like slags. i am 16 and hav a 4 week old daughter named daisy who i look after the best i can
Tue Jun 26 08:42:35 2007
JODIE
Ryt well, I bcame pregnant wen I was 13. ye I no its very young. I now hav a gorgeous lil boy called Liam who is 1 next month. I luv him wiv all ma heart n more. I hav matured a lot since his birth. i am still wiv tha dad who is 17 and we live in a flat 2geva - it is a struggle but we cope for our lil boy. I would not change anyfin cos my boy means the world 2 me. yea, ma family dont speak 2 me anymur but thats ther choice ther the one loosin out on a grandson n a nephew. anyways steve ur nt d 1 hu has 2 cope wiv a baby. at least we luk afta r kids an do a gd job lyk an adult wud.
Tue Jun 26 08:42:01 2007
Natasha
I am preganat and I am only 14! I didn't plan it and I've only just found out. I've told my 2 best friends and they are trying to convince me to tell my mum, but they don't know how mad my mum will be with me and I don't want to lose her.
Mon Jun 25 08:28:16 2007
Nick, Web Team
Wrexham (11.3 per cent) no longer has the unappealing title of teenage abortion capital of Wales - that tag now belongs to Conwy (15 per cent), according to yesterday's Evening Leader.
Fri Jun 22 07:19:15 2007
Steve, Newport
C. Wrexham, crime is crime regardless of what it is. Me on a soap-box, no I don't think so. I have asked one poster why her boyfriend is in prson as she has clearly stated he is in prison because he is 22. As I said, being 22 isn't a crime, having sex with an underage girl is.
Thu Jun 21 13:56:08 2007
C, Wrexham
Steve, I think you should get off your soap box and go and have a go at someone who has done a REAL crime. Prisons are packed anyway without people who do petty crimes. You should be thinking about those who prey on the elderly, attack them and steal from them, those thugs who murder innocent people. Don't forget Steve it takes two to tango so stop blaming the young lads.
Mon Jun 18 08:29:53 2007
Kana, 19, London
To M. I found it very shocking to hear that you are having 3 children at your age. It sounds very young to be a mum at the age of 12. I'm having my baby boy in October. Even though I am 19, I was pretty scared to accept the fact that I am pregnant. You must have gone through a lot of stuff. You must be a brave girl. Well, good luck to you and your family.
Mon Jun 18 08:28:18 2007
Jade, 16, n Keegan, 15 months
This is to M. OMG, I'm a 16 yr old mum to a 15 mnth old child. He's brill, love him. I gta say I fink ur fab n so is the daddy. Steve - wateva her bf has dun he's stuck by her.
Wed Jun 13 09:25:42 2007
Steve, Newport
M do you mind if I ask if your boyfriend is in prison for having sex with an underage girl? All you have said in your post is he is in prison because he is 22. Being 22 isn't a crime, having sex with an underage girl is.
Tue Jun 12 08:35:48 2007
M
I'm 16 years old and I'm a mother to a 4 year old and a 2 years old and my son past a way at birth. I am pregnant with my 4th baby. It's a boy and I'm so happy and I can not want anything more! I'm with their father but he in prison right now because he is 22 years old - but I have been with him five years.
Mon Jun 11 08:50:57 2007
Charlene Keating
To everyone that think all teen mums don't have the experience to look after a baby and sponge off benefits, think again. I am 17 with a one year old daughter and I'm 35 weeks pregnant with her brother and I couldn't be happier. I've just finished my GCSEs and I'm taking a hairdressing course at a mother and baby unit in Sept and guess what I'm still with the father.
Tue Jun 5 08:13:23 2007
N from Wales
I am 15 and I am pregnant. It was so hard telling my mum but now I'm so glad I did because it is so much easier when your family are there 4 u. I want 2 keep my baby I am 2 months pregnant at the moment. At first I didn't want it but the more I read about young mums the more I think I can cope. Hopefuly my partner will be there for me but whether he is or not I'm going to have this baby and cope myself.
Fri Jun 1 12:30:49 2007
Steve, Newport
I would like to comment on Emma from N.W. Yorks post. I would agree with everything she has said in it but would go further. Yes it is very difficult for someone aged 17 plus to survive and bring up a child. I would still like to know exactly what is available to teenagers under the age of 16 because as I have said all along to have a child when you are aged 16.5 or younger means you have broken the laws on Age of Consent. Surely this situation has to be addressed.
Wed May 30 15:34:00 2007
Emma N W Yorks
If you're a young girl and thinking of becoming a mother read this. I am 31 and to many of you reading this i.e. teenagers will think this I am ancient! I had a baby when I was 21 - I was young and I did not have the skills to be a mother. I was still at college and my partner was in a low paid job. This is not the best start for any child because you cannot concentrate on bringing the child up well if you are worried about money, housing, college, the father's commitment, your parents' reaction, what your friends might say etc etc. My partner and I had been together for 5 years, but we were young and the relationship did not last. This is not good for ANY child whether you think you are the best mum in the world or not. One parent cannot/should not raise a child alone. It's very hard. I did an OK job on my own but I was lucky I had family to support me - A LOT. Now I am married and have another child who is 3. I am ten times the mother I was at 21. I am mature, responsible, have a very well paid job, a nice home, and STABILITY. This is the key word here. Children need to feel secure and loved and this can only happen in a stable loving relationship where both parents are old enough to accept the responsibility. Let's get to the point here. Look at your friends or anyone you know - how many of them are still with the partner they were with at 15, 16 or 17? Not many hey? That's the point, wait until you are older, no teenage lad wants a kid, end of. Sorry girls but some of you are living in a very selfish bubble...
Tue May 29 09:17:12 2007
Bliss Magazine
We are writing a sensitive piece on teenage girls who have had to make tough decisions after discovering they were pregnant. We are looking for case studies of varying scenarios, whether you had an abortion, chose to have a baby or give one up for adoption. Would anyone like to share their story with us so that other teenagers just like you understand situations that peers can find themselves in. Please email details and send a pic of yourself to bliss@panini.co.uk. We look forward to hearing from you. The bliss team x
Wed May 23 16:38:16 2007
Michelle
Being a mum is hard. I am 19 and have a 2 year old girl. All I need is my family by my side because they have been for 2 years. Just want 2 say thanks 2 all my family.
Thu May 17 13:55:20 2007
Jade (age16)~~Keegan (1 year old)
Every1 there's nowt wrong with being a teen mam, my lil boy's nearly 1 n he's doin brill so all you mams owt der show every1 how gud ya can b! I see Steve from Newport is still on here! I am doin gr8 with my bby boy Keegan. I luv him and give him all the support he needs n that's thanks 2 Teresa Foster Evans 2 she's brill dno where I'd be without yhoo!
Mon May 14 09:10:38 2007
C, Wrexham
Kana in London, good luck with everything. I really am going to have to save up because I am due a week before Christmas so as soon as birthday is over with there is Christmas! It won't be so bad for the first few years but when he/she is about ten they will want everything! I wish you and your partner the best luck in the world. PS to everyone who is pregnant, don't let anyone ever bring you down for what has happened. How can being a mother and bringing a new person into the world be a wrong thing? That's what we're here for!
Tue May 8 10:36:03 2007
Sammie, Scunthorpe
I'm 15 years old and I've just found out I'm pregnent. I don't even know what to do I'm scared to tell my mum cause I'm scared what she'll think about me. I'm really upset about the whole situation and I think you are all brave, I don't know what to do.
Fri May 4 12:00:37 2007
Kana Strelley, 19, London
C, Wrexham. I can totally understand you. I was very scared to tell my parents about my baby but I felt so much better afterwards. I think you are so organised about the money for the baby too. My baby is due in October so I'm trying to save as much money as I can with my partner who is also 19 years old. Good luck to you and your new family!
Mon Apr 30 08:43:43 2007
CIARA MORRIS FROM HASTINGS MN
I had my baby at 17 now I am 18 and it's starting to get easier. When I first found out I was scared but I still told my sister who I was living with at that time. My baby's father was also my first so when he left me I took it very hard, but now we keep in contact and I feel like everything will be alright if I just put it in the Lord's hands. So, to all my teen mothers, keep your head up and keep pushing. Do the best you can for you and your baby.
Thu Apr 26 07:42:21 2007
stacey
Amy, I know exactly what you been through after falling pregnant at 13, having him at 14 now being 15 and my baby being 15 months. I have gone back a year at school to get the best possible results for my child and if you ever need someone to talk to you can talk to me. But as long as you think you're doing right for your child then it is right. People need to accept teen mums and stop treating them like children that don't know what's going on.
Mon Apr 23 09:55:04 2007
C, Wrexham
I am 19 years old and have just found out I am pregnant. My boyfriend who I have been with for four years told me he didn't want anything to do with me or the baby. He's slowly coming round now and I am confident by the time the baby is born he will be a changed man. People have a go at teen mums and I know it looks bad. I've been told an uncounted number of times that I had so much to do with my life but they can't understand that I can still do the things I want to do. It may take me a little bit longer than people without children but I do still have everything to live for. They also say we're irresponsible and don't care about our children. I have stopped smoking to protect my unborn child and I dont drink. I have opened up a savings account so I can buy the baby things myself without depending on other people and as for spending my life on the benifits, I will be going back to work once my maternity leave runs out. People shouldn't discriminate about young mothers. We love our children just as much as older mums. A tip for all you young girls... tell your parents as soon as you find out no matter how scared you are. They respect you so much more for not keeping it from them. Also, Mrs Foster Evans, you used to teach me in Darland. I think you have done a brilliant job!
Mon Apr 23 09:04:09 2007
Teresa CYFLE
Amy from Horsham, If you email me at teresa.fosterevans@wrexham.gov.uk I will see if I can get one of my girls to contact you and maybe they can share some experinces and thoughts with you. Good luck. Teresa :-)
Fri Apr 20 07:38:19 2007
Amy From Horsham
In Horsham there is not a lot for young mums, and my school is not sympathetic (and seems to think I'm the only 15yr old with a baby). I was 14 when I found out I was pregnant. My son is now 10mths and he is perfect. I just wish there was someone that I could talk to that has been in the same position as me.
Thu Apr 19 13:35:22 2007
Kelsie from Durham
Some of these comments really put teen mums down! I am 16 and have just recently had a beautiful little girl. I fell pregnant when I was 15 but that was because the condom had split and my partner, the father of the baby, is the only person I have slept with. We are deeply in love and have been together for 4 years. He has two jobs and is on very high pay and we are coping just fine! People who say teenage mums are bad mums are wrong. I know people a lot older than me who are worse mums than I am.
Thu Apr 19 13:33:55 2007
Steve, Newport
Kana, London, of course eveyone has a right to their own point of view we live in a democracy. There is an underlying problem that all of Society needs to address and by Society I include girls under 16. The number of girls under 16 who post on here saying how good and clever they have been or will be is extremely high. The converse are those like me who say OK you're pregnant but someone got you pregnant. Now until that person is brought to book we have a problem. As I see it Society does not want to accept teenage pregnancies but on the other hand pregnant teenagers need the support of Society.
Mon Mar 26 17:02:32 2007
Kana, London
I do respect teenage mums. I totally agree with Allanah who answered who the accusations. I am 19 year-old and I found out myself being pregnant about a month ago. At first, my boyfriend who is also 19 years old, didn't want me to keep our baby, but after talking about it together and spoken to a lot of people, we decide to keep this new life. I am getting married with my boyfrined before the baby is due.
I am currently in a university in London, but I am deferring a year and planning to go back to education in 2008.
Mon Mar 26 09:22:32 2007
Kana Strelley, 19year-old, mum to be, London
Steve, Newport. Some people say ignore Steve but it won't help anyone. I don't think he is abusing teenage mums. I do think he has right to say what he wants to say. I am not saying I agree with him or not. I respect teenage mums and dads, but we should respect what he says here as he (I would say) respects what you girls talk about here. Being an adult is respecting someone not only just to be a good mother/father. I understand what you girls are saying. I am a teenage mum to be as well. Everyone have their own opinions! Steve, have I got the point?
Mon Mar 26 09:09:34 2007
Ellise and Mia
We have total respect for those young mums who do go back to school and college. There are nurseries that provide while students are at college. There are those who give you a bad name - the ones who rely on benefit money and benefit housing. They won't continue working or studying.
Tue Mar 20 15:44:46 2007
Sarah
There's no right or wrong age to have a baby, everyone's ready at different times. People should stop stereotyping teen mums!
Mon Mar 19 08:44:31 2007
Hana, teen mum
I was only 15 when I had my baby boy and we are doing great. Steve, you don't have a clue what it's like to be a mum in your teens. Just leave us alone. Teen mums are great, at least we took responsibility for our babies instead of having abortions. Well done all you teen mums out there. One day your baby will thank you for being so brave. xxx
Fri Mar 16 08:26:55 2007
Steve, Newport
Bex, define an old person.
Thu Mar 15 14:44:03 2007
Bex
Maybe everyone out there criticising young mums should think about old people having babies. That is bad cuz when the child grows up, this means they won't have their mum or dad cuz they would have died of old age, whereas young mums will live to see their child grow up and do many good things...think about it!
Wed Mar 14 15:04:13 2007
Steve Newport
Natasha (Paignton) I would take issue with you on one part of your post i.e. there is right or wrong age to have a baby. In respect of this "board" there is and that is anyone under 16.
Wed Mar 14 14:14:45 2007
Natasha, Paignton
People tell young mums all the time not to keep their babies but as long as you feel happy and comfortable in your situation then keep the baby. The love you get from a baby son or daughter is the best feeling you will ever experience, knowing they rely on you completely and they show you love in a whole new way, there's no right or wrong age to have a baby it does not mean you are a slag. If you need to talk there are lots of people you can talk to.
Tue Mar 13 12:28:06 2007
Hannah
I'm shocked and disgusted with some of the comments that have been made on this page. Having a baby at a young age does not mean that you are a slag nor does it mean that you can't have a life. What does age have to do with anything anyway unless your under the legal age of consent but then whose fault is that? Young girls AND BOYS should all be given a harsh reality check when it comes to the 'birds and bees'. It's no good showing them pictures and diagrams of things - show them real people telling them their real stories or make them live it for a day. I had my baby at 17 and hated every second of it, not the pregnancy but the narrow minded people who thought that I needed to enrol in teenage anti-natal classes. What's that about? Who is to say that someone 30 something can look after their 1st child any better than I could?
Mon Mar 12 09:23:53 2007
Lauren
I'm 17, before someone jumps on me saying I'm too young to be having sex. Yes, I'm 17 and in a long term relationship with a boy who I love dearly. A condom broke on us quite recently and I went for emergency contraception. We've already agreed that if the ECP doesn't work for us, we're having this child and we're going to love and care for it as best we can. To tell you the truth I would not have taken that pill if it was classed as legally or medically an aid to abortion. We've decided not to go through with an abortion simply because we would regret it for the rest of our lives, we're both against abortion (but for it in some respects) and we're both willing to accept the consequences of what we've got ourselves into. (Another thing to go in the record, I don't judge people who have had an abortion in the past, for whatever reason. I'm not saying they're right but I have a different set of morals. It's like marmite, you either love it or hate it.) Needless to say, I am absolutely terrified. I wouldn't have a baby if I wasn't against abortion due to something as minor as this. We're both in college, my boyfriend has two jobs. I plan on going to university. He doesn't. He promised me that he would leave college if he had to but he wants me to stay on. For me, personally, if I am pregnant, I didn't do this for the benefits, a council flat or whatever else I could sponge off of the government. It's a mistake, these things happen, I just have to live with the consequences.
Fri Mar 9 08:15:18 2007
R from Manchester
I am 16 and I am expecting my first child in May. My story is I was raped. I have been called so many names and it's really horrible to hear it when they don't know what's gone on. So to you out there that criticise me and others, I tell you to pack it all in because you don't know the full story behind us.
Mon Mar 5 08:38:53 2007
Jennie, New Zealand
Hi guys! I'm from New Zealand, I'm 20 I have a 2 year old son. I am a full time student and work part time. The reason I am writing on here is that as part of my tech assignment I have to write a "zine", a non commercial magazine. I'd love to hear your stories.
Mon Mar 5 08:36:28 2007
This debate is now closed
