I'm glad I've got toes,
Two rows of five, just enough.
It sure must be tough on those
With a 'six' and a 'four',
Or two dozen more.

They're best at the front
Not the side of the foot,
Which would then be too wide.
And beside that your shoe
Would look funny on you.

They're no use perched high
On the instep,
Or by themselves,
Spaced all around
And an inch off the ground.

If all on one foot they'd
Been put nicely displayed
But...
A design so misguided
We'd look very lopsided.

I'm glad they are there
Just where my foot stops
A toe pops out,
And - with four spare
I've around about five.

---

Enigma

Part One
I've pondered this for ages,
I've left no stone unturned,
Consulted many sages,
Yet still I haven't learned
Why this should be.
It puzzles me.
Oh dear! I'm so concerned.

I've checked in all the bookshops,
The library and though
I shouted from the housetops
Nobody could throw
Some light on it,
No little bit
Of what I need to know.

But still I'll find the answer,
Continue my research.
I'll ask the village policeman and
The pastor at our church.
I MUST know why,
I'll try and try,
I WON'T give up my search.

The problem seems so clear cut,
Straightforward, you'd agree.
I'm sure the answer's near but
This question baffles me.
I'll solve it though,
Proclaim it so
That all the world can see.

Part Two
At long, long last I've cracked it
It's plain as plain can be!
I must be such a dimwit,
Oh silly, silly, me.
I'll spill the beans,
Show what it means,
Reveal it - and you'll see.

For me it's been so wearing,
I've hardly slept a wink.
While you've been so forbearing
Whatever did you think?
So now I'll tell...
...Oh bl**dy h*ll
My pen's run ... out ... of i k !