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Young Carer

Girl generic.

Last updated: 16 May 2007

A young carer from Powys - who remains anonymous for legal reasons - spent most of her teenage years caring for her mother and two brothers. This is her story.

"I am a young carer. I am 18 and live in Powys.

I started caring when I was 10-years-old for my mother who had depression and an alcohol problem. At the time we were living in England along with my younger brother.

I had to make sure my mother had someone there for her at all times seeing as she was drinking all the time. This went on for two years till she met someone who became my stepdad.

He seemed to be such a nice guy for the first year until my mum fell pregnant.

He started drinking loads and getting us in debt as my brother and I had to sell our stuff to get money to live.

Then, when I was in the first year of high school we had to sell our house and we moved to Wales. My mum was still pregnant.

We didn't find somewhere to live at first so we had to live in a tent.

This is when my stepdad started getting violent so I knew I would have to look after my mum again because it made her really depressed.

We finally found a house in South Wales. My mum gave birth to my brother and now I was not just making sure my mum was OK I was also looking after my baby brother even though I was only a teenager.

I was babysitting all the time while my mum went to the pub or was too drunk to look after herself. My stepdad would go to work, come home, have a sleep, then some dinner, then go to the pub and never spent any time with his son, my brother.

I was putting him to bed making sure he was fed, changing his nappy and educating him.

I never had time to go out and socialise and was always really tired in school.

A year went by and we moved again, only up the road, and my mum had met someone who I thought was really bad news. She became her best mate. She had several children and was also an alcoholic.

After a while I had to babysit my brother and my mum's mates' children all at the same time and her children were aged from one to eleven.

Even though I had school the next day they wouldn't come home until about seven or eight in the morning, so I wouldn't make it to school. This happened at least three times a week.

A year later I called social services because of my stepdad's violence and he was asked to move away.

My mum then took him back and we were all taken in to care.

I am now living on my own. My middle brother is living with our dad and my baby brother is living with with his dad because my mother died in 2003.

I never knew that I was a young carer until I moved to Powys and met Sue Hitch of Powys Young Carers. By then it was too late to get help as I wasn't caring any more.

All these experiences have made me a stronger person although it has also made me depressed in the past.

I am now involved with Powys Young Carers, to help young carers of the future with their wants and needs.We have also put a presentation together to help people understand about young carers."

Article by a young carer from Powys.

  • More of your stories...

  • your comments

    Nicola Hill St.Helens
    Hi. I actually understand what being a young carer is. I have been a young carer since i was 8 yeas old. My mum has NF2 whichis tumours on the nerves of the body but thay are non cancerous. But my dad left my mum and me and my brother when I was 8 years old. My mum had just had head surgery to remove a tumour from the top of the spinal cord which linked to near the brain.She could not cope properly with my dsd being around as he did naf all anyway telling her when and why and who she could spend the money on. But my dad left my mum when we was on holiday. But when we got back she stiwas%! 20recovering from the makjor operation, she looed like she had had a stroke one side of her face had no muscle reflex in it. Also she had to learn how to lift a kettle all over again. em ad my brother were 8 and 13. We were both left to make sure mum was having the right medication It was hard but i just thought life was like that. Then when i got into high school nmy mentor got me involved with young carers and in a way they have helped me nd my mum. I have done things I never would of done. I ahve been on holiday all for free which is a great help to my mum wo cannot work but in my eyes young carers is more for the younger ones not the older one. Even though older you hsve more responsibility but hearing others stories makes you feel lucky for the fact your life is not as bad.. I hope al young carers who are hit or hurting and want a person to talk to gain confidence in speaking otu as your not alone.
    Sun Nov 8 19:08:33 2009

    Jan Chilton, Welshpool
    I too feel this young carer is an inspiration to us all. Parenting/caring is the most difficult thing I've ever done despite its rewards within a 'normal' caring family unit, yet so few admit this. She displayed so much courage and resolve. Isn't it a sad reflection of our society that this young person had all that responsibility and sacrificed so much of her own education because no one before Sue Hitch seemed to have noticed her plight. Also an idicator that she must have done a very good job of caring for her young siblings and forced extended family. In a fair world she should should now be given an opportunity to follow an educational/career dream and given all the support (financial and emotional) she should have had when she was being a carer instead of being cared for. After all how much money did she save various social service departments over the years.
    Thu Jul 12 10:39:20 2007

    David Lewis Oswestry.
    Hello , A sad and yet uplifting story, your courage, and use of common sense years above your age, are to be admired. I salute you, an inspiration to all.
    Wed Jul 11 09:29:51 2007

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