1. An unerring interest in the mundane
D’you find the idea of watching wood warp rather intriguing? Got a thing for drying paint? If the answer is yes to either or both of these questions, then you’re an ideal candidate for a boring hobby.

2. A complete lack of imagination
Have you ever thought about what it would be like if we didn’t exist? If there was no Earth, no Stars, no Galaxies, no Universe? No? Fantastic!

3. An anorak
Preferably purchased from an east-European market stall.

4. A bobble hat
To keep your thoughts warm.

5. A thermos flask
For your tea (outdoor or indoor persuits).