Kleenex have offered Britney Spears two million quid to become the face of their new advertising campaign.

The tissue magnates hatched their cunning plan after seeing the self-confessed "emotional wreck" sob her heart out on America's Dateline show.

An insider told DailySnack.com: "Kleenex thought it would help her tattered image if she found the humour in her tearful interview and did a comedy parody of it... she could get people to laugh with her, not at her, if she took part in her very own skit."

Frankly, you'd expect a little more sensitivity from a company who are responsible for drying the world's tears. Indeed, Britney is said to be fuming at their tactlessness.

A friend explained: "She wants to put that horrific TV appearance behind her as quickly as possible and doesn't want to remind the world about it with a series of tasteless commercials."

What next, we wonder? Shakira advertising hip replacements? Rihanna promoting the National Lifeboats Association? LL Cool J and Jennifer Lopez backing incontinence pads? Probably not...