Hey hey HEEEY! What time is iiiiit?
Hello? What happened there, ladies and gentlemen? Listen, I'm gonna ask you again, I say: "What time is it?" and you say: "It's PRESTON time!", yes?
Actually, no, hang on. I say: "What time is it?" and you say: "Chico time has finished! NOW it's Preston time!", yes? Everyone got that? Let's start again...
....no, Chantelle, shush up a minute, I'm talking to the people. I'm telling them about my new catch-phrase...yes, yes, I know, I was gonna make it 'It's Preston and Chantelle true love for ever time!', but I kept saying 'It's Preston and Chan-true foretells time...ever!" by mistake...Yeah, my tongue gets all twizzled up and then...
No, no, it's not 'cos I want to be the Celebrity one. I know you won Big Brother...yeah, I know I didn't win Big Brother...yeah...I wasn't even second...or third...it's not that, sweetheart, it's just...OK, OK, I'll tell them! Jeez...
Hey! Hello ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls! Bit of a change of plan! When I say: "What time is it?", you say: "It used to be Chico time, but now it's Chantelle time! And we like Preston too!" OK, are you ready?
...aw, come on! I did it! I did it! You heard me! I said you first and everything!...You want me to WHAAT? Oh please Chantelle, I don't wanna...no, no, I know...I'd be nothing on my own...No, no, I don't want to do Heat magazine on my own...NO! I don't want to be the big star! YOU'RE the big star!...(sigh)...OK...Yes, yes, whatever you want...
OK, boys and girls, ladies and gentlemen, lords and ladies, chicken and chips...when I say: "What time is it?" you say: "Well, seeing as it's clearly not Chico time any more, is it Chantelle time, Preston?" and then I'll say: "Yes! Yes! It's definitely Chantelle time, and don't you worry about who I am, I'm just an ordinary boy, see?" and...hang on...
...what NOW? I wasn't! I said you, and then I said not to worry about...well I didn't mean THE BAND, did I? I wouldn't sully the name of my band by associating it with some cheesy reality TV show, would I? We're MUCH more credible than that. The kids love us cos we make a stand against the over commercial-ality-ness-icide of modern culture, right, and the dumbing down of media expectations and...and...
...oh no, I've really gone and done it now, boys and girls. She's gone off it a right strop. And we've got a tabloid centerspread to do at five, so, look, do me a favour, right? In a minute I'm going to ask you: "What time is it?", yeah? And when I do, can you all call out: "It's time you bought Chantelle some Prada flowers in a Versace vase, and quick!". OK?
Actually, forget it, I'll just go. If I'm quick, I might catch her before she works out which button to press in the lift...
