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Let's
face it, the Not Very Big Brother Housemates are a bit rubbish at
weekly tasks.
So
far they've managed to fail every one of them quite spectacularly.
The question is, were they unlucky or just plain stupid?
We
fear the latter, but hope springs eternal and as the little chaps
revealed their chosen identities for this week's superhero task,
we are trying to muster up some optimism.
Unfortunately,
none of them list "Completing Weekly Tasks" as one of
their special powers, but there are some very interesting ones that
might come in handy!
 Cameraon
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Name:
Su-prayer Man
Arch enemy: Devil Woman
Motto: When one door closes, there's usually a naked
woman behind it!
Special powers: Walking on pool, feeding the entire house
for a week two tins of beans and five loaves of bread etc etc
Theme tune: The Lord is my Shepherd's Pie |
 Fedarolo |
Name:
Captain Cock Up
Arch enemy: Everyone, anyone, non-gender specific depending
on the day of the week and who he is talking to at the time
Motto: All [fill in as necessary] are slags or "trying
is the first step towards failure"
Special powers: The ability to alienate and upset absolutely
everybody regardless of colour, creed, nationality or hair colour.
Theme tune: It Wasn't Me (Honest - and if it was I wouldn't
tell you about it anyway!) |
 Gosh |
Name:
Not So Naked Chef Man, in'nit
Arch enemy: Atkins Diet Woman
Motto: Too many cooks spoil my spicy chick pea stew
Special powers: The ability to render anybody unconscious
with his straight talking street talk
Theme tune: Dinner, Dinner, Dinner, Dinner, Dinner, Dinner,
Dinner, Dinner, Fat man! (to the tune of Batman!) or You Can
Keep Your Shirt On! |
 Hooray |
Name:
Super Scary Bloke
Arch enemy: Reason
Motto: Hand actions speak louder than words
Special power: Can deal with very hard situations and
thinks he becomes invisible to the naked eye using his special
duvet cloak.
Theme tune: Mama Told Me Not To Come |
 Hott |
Name:
Splinter Boy
Arch enemy: Decisions
Motto: If you treat the people around you with love and
respect, they will never guess that you're trying to get them
evicted.
Special power: The ability to sit on a fence for about
nine weeks
Theme tune: You'll Never Talk Alone (in your sleep) |
 Little
John |
Name:
Amazingly Dull Boy
Arch enemy: Darth Vader
Motto: Speak when you're not spoken to
Special powers: Turns bread into toast, can make people
sleep at will, earning sh*t loads of money
Theme tune: Don't Let Me Entertain You |
 Nosh |
Name:
Secret Tic Tac Girl
Arch enemy: Meat
Motto: You have to be 100% behind someone, before you
can stab them in the back.
Special powers: The ability to change her colours, allegiances
and bikini but not her facial expression. She can also live
in any community with no running water or sanitary facilities
at will.
Theme tune: Karma Chameleon |
 Stuff |
Name:
Smiley Krankee Boy/Girl
Arch enemy: The end of the Blackpool summer season
Motto: Redditch is not Birmingham
Special powers: The ability to turn from mature Midlands
woman to irritating small schoolboy in seconds
Theme tune: Fandabi-dozey girl |
 Tinya |
Name:
Super Blusher Woman
Arch enemy: Facial Scrub
Motto: If it comes in a squeezy tube I'll slap it on
my face
Special powers: Ability to do her make up in under five
hours and going weeks on end without washing her hair. Goes
round daubing people with blusher in order to tar everybody
with the same brush.
Theme tune: Make Uppa Your Face |
See
our Week
Three roundup of the little goings-on.
See our story of how we chose our 12 contestants
through the auditions.
Get
a behind-the-scenes
tour of the house here »
Find
out how you
can direct the action in the Not Very Big Brother house.
And
don't forget - Not Very Big Brother is watching you - probably with
the use of a microscope!
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