What is it?
When a married couple officially end their marriage. But the situation will be pretty much the same if your parents aren't married and split up.
Divorce factoid The number of divorces is actually falling. Office of National Statistics in 2005
Can I stop my parents splitting up?
Nope. You have to let them decide for themselves. Have faith that they’ve tried to work things out already, and respect their decision. This is about their relationship with each other - their feelings towards you won’t change.
What will it be like for me when they’re not together anymore?
There’ll be a lot of changes, but things will settle down. If you have to decide who to live with, make a list of pros and cons for each parent. Talk to both parents about how you want things to be, especially the arrangements to see the one you don’t live with. In the end, trust your instincts and go with what feels right.
Can I help them get back together?
You can’t change the way they feel about each other. If they decide the marriage is over, it's over. Don’t waste your time and energy trying to pretend it isn’t.
Will my home life ever be happy again?
It’s hard on everyone if parents are unhappy with each other. Once parents have split up, things can be much calmer. If you’re anxious about the future, talk to your parents. You can also follow the links below for help and advice. It’ll be tough at first, but if your parents are happier, you probably will be too.
Written by Ali Cronin
Last updated 17th June 2007
Further help and advice
- It's Not Your Fault: practical info for people going through a family break-up.
- Divorce Aid: divorce advice, support and info.
- TheSite.org: When Parents Part.
- Or call ChildLine on 0800 1111 (free) or The Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90 (cost of a local call) 24/7 to talk about your problems.
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Charlotte, 14
My parents split up when I was 11 but as soon as they did I noticed they were both a lot happier and even though I miss my dad I know if they were still together we would all be unhappy.
The Shadow, **
My parents split up when i was young, so I've learned to live with it, but I know some people whose parents have just split up, some of which have started smoking because of the depression. Trust me, do not be upset by your parents desions. If it is about stepparents, you sometimes have to take a stand. If you don't like your stepparents, you have to talk about it. The same goes with step siblings. Remeber, a problem can only get heavier when you're the only one carrying it.
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