Crushes & Unrequited love

The misery

Love is a beautiful thing, right? Not when it's unrequited. That's when you're totally head over heels about someone and they have no idea or - even worse – they know but aren't interested.

Definition Unrequited means 'not returned or reciprocated'
Oxford Dictionary

If they just have no idea you’re interested...

You have two options; 'fess up or accept that nothing will ever happen.

You don't have to blurt it out, but you do have to take some action.

You can't carry on letting your life revolve around someone who hasn't got a clue you like them. It will only lead to heartache when they cheerily tell you about their hot new girlfriend/boyfriend.

If they know, but they don't feel the same way...

It can feel like the end of the world. But the heartache will eventually fade along with your feelings for this person.

Don't feel embarrassed that they know how you feel. It's far better to make your feelings known than to spend your life wondering 'What if...'

Think of it like this: if it was the other way round would you think the person was sad and desperate, or would you feel flattered and touched?

It's Not Your Fault, OK?

Don't beat yourself up wondering why they don't like you back.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, but also nothing you can do to change their mind. You need to start enjoying all the things you enjoyed before they came along.

And remember, you're not alone. Unrequited love is just an unavoidable part of life - if it can happen to Jennifer Aniston, it can happen to anyone.

Written by Kevin Darling

Last updated June 2007

Further help and advice

• ECrush


• The site.org


• The Science Of Love

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