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28 December 2009
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Friends helping friends

Friends, eh? They can be flippin hard work. You keep emailing us about them, so we're putting as many of your questions as we can up here >>>

Mum's the word

A girl looking at her mum

I'm on my 2nd year of my secondary school. I made loads of new friends at my first and they usually invite me to come over but my mum say that she doesn't know them so i'm not allowed.

I always say that she has to get know them but she never has time. Now, my friends think i'm ignoring them. What should i do?

Beatris, 13

Slink Anna's mate Nigel says:


Three girls linking arms

Hey Beatris,

I'm glad to hear you've got so many friends. Your mum is just being careful and protective like all mums are. It's in her D.N.A and it'll decrease a little as you get older but never go away completely. So might as well get used to it!

Your mum sounds very busy so I think the best thing to do is to bring your friends to you. Ask your mum if you can have a sleepover with friends or if they could come to dinner or just watch a dvd at the weekend.

This way you're maximising time when your mum is at home and available. Hopefully, then she can gradually meet all of your friends and will be a little more relaxed about you visiting people she's met.

Hint: if your mum is very busy she'd appreciate some extra help around the house. She'll definitely notice if you do extra cleaning, hoovering or washing up and this will help you big time when you next invite a friend over or ask to go to a friend's house.

Your thoughts:


girls on a sleepover

Hi Beatris,

This same thing happened to me in my first year at secondary school.

I would recommend talking to your mum. Tell her that these friends are nice and they're the right people to hang around with. Try not to argue with her, keep your cool and she's more likely to trust you.

As for your friends, tell them the truth. Just casually mention that your mum would like to get to know them first. Maybe you could have your friends over to your house instead - that way you can still be with them but your mum can get to know them too.

Esme, 13

Next week's question:

Hi Slink! I have a friend who really likes this girl (when I say really i'm putting it VERY LIGHTLY!) anywho he is like obsessed with her and won't stop liking her.

He has asked her out three times and every time she's said no. He has been my friend for ages and Im slightly scared for him 'cause i don't want him to keep getting hurt.

The thing is I have been out with him twice b4 and decided we were better as friends, so i don't know if this is just a friends instinct or i'm being slightly obsessive about it. Help and advice plz!!!

Hana


Please remember: Our friend chat doesn't come from qualified experts, just our friends, and may not be right for you.

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