Can I date and keep my mates?
I'm going out with a guy who i think is amazing but i am really struggling to hang on to my mates.
I feel like they hate me now and I regret not spending time with them. I never seem to be involved in thingz like I used to and i think that my new boyfriend is to blame for it.
What should I do?
Angel, 12
Slink Aiss' mate S-J says:
Hi Angel,
That's cool that you met a nice guy but it doesn't mean that you have to compromise your friendships. If your friends don't have boyfriends then maybe they feel a little left out or perhaps jealous? I'm sure they don't hate you :)
It sounds like you know that you haven't been putting in some good quality time with them and maybe they feel like you've been too busy with this guy (but that's not his fault so don't blame him).
Why don't you suggest doing something girly and fun? Invite them round or suggest a shopping trip or visit to the cinema. You don't want to neglect your friends and get too caught up with this guy, however lovely he is!
You probably feel like you're not involved in things because you have this guy taking up some of your time. As your friends don't have that, they are obviously spending that extra time with each other.
If you suggest a few things to do so you can all chill out together then you will feel more involved again and your friends will remember how much fun they have hanging out with you.
Hope it all works out,
S-J
xxx
Your advice:
It's great you have such an amazing boyfriend, it's just a shame that you struggling with your mates. Try doing something really fun with your friends. Have a sleepover and invite them all round.
If you think they might not want to come, ask them what days they are free. They can't say they are busy every day weekend for the next year! Paint nails, do facepacks, watch movies. Sometime during that evening talk about how you don't want to lose them as mates.
Hope this helps!
Nessa, 14
Next week's question:
What's the rule on dating friend's ex's?
I like this guy but he's my friend's ex, should I leave it or not?
Lacy, 14
Please remember: Our friend chat doesn't come from qualified experts, just our friends, and may not be right for you.
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