Help me Slink!
My friend is always putting me down. On our non-uniform day, the first think she said to me was: I'm sorry, but that looks chavy. The other day she kept saying how my hair was messy and greasy and my skin was really dry. I know I get greasy hair and my skin is horrible but she doesn't understand what it is like going through puberty. What should I say to her?
Hannah, 12
Slink Trev's mate Claire says:
Hello Hannah,
Are you sure this person is your friend?! They don't sound very nice at all. Puberty can be really tough for girls and guys. The Slinksters have all been there, and they're still here to tell the tale. Hooray! But your friend being mean doesn't make it any easier.
Why so mean? She might not understand the changes you're going through. Why spots are popping up, why hair is sprouting where it didn't used to, and why curves are starting to form. On top of that she might not realise what a complete meanie she's being.
You need to talk to her because if she's a real friend, she wouldn't want to hurt you. Next time she says something hurtful, you should tell her that you find it upsetting when she talks to you like that.
Reassure her that you always want her to be honest with you (it is a best mate's duty to let you know if you are sporting a fashion disaster after all!) but say that sometimes what she says hurts and that you'd prefer it if she found a nicer way of telling you things.
This might come as quite a shock to her, so be gentle and reassuring. You want the truth, but you don't want constant put-downs.
Finally be happy in your own skin, wear what makes you happy and remember that everyone goes through puberty - even your mate!
Please remember: Our friend chat doesn't come from qualified experts, just our friends, and may not be right for you.
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