BBC HomeExplore the BBC
This page has been archived and is no longer updated. Find out more about page archiving.

16 October 2014
Chewin' The Fat

BBC Homepage
Scotland
»Chewin' the Fat
Downloads
chewin-the-com.fat
Neds
Jack and Victor
Still Game
Personality Test
Live Chat
Ronald's Homepage
Plugins
Comedy 

Contact Us

Live Chat with Greg and Ford
Downloads
The Neds
Jack & Victor
Personality Test
Chewin-the-com.fat
Ford and Greg as Jack and Victor

Ford and Greg joined us for some vino, nuts and a live chat before the fifth show of series four on the evening of Friday 15th February.

Question from Scott Morrison: How many more series of Chewin' the Fat do you plan to do?
Ford: Nine.
Greg: No more!

Question from David Murdoch: Where did you come up with Captain Nipple Whistle?
G
reg: It was written for us by Florence & Connell.
Ford:
Aye and they don't have any nipples!
Greg:
It was Captain Kipper Whistle for a while, their stuff is full of typos!

Question from Scott Morrison: If you were stranded on a desert island with three of the characters from Chewin' the Fat, who would you want them to be?
Ford:
Nipple Whistle, Victor - er, three? …
Greg:
I want the three girls from Smack the Pony!

Question from Jabba: I'd love to know who the guys based the neds on?
Greg:
Neds!
Ford:
Two neds!

Question from Colin Mills: Why have you stopped the gonnae no dae that sketches?
Ford:
Cos we're puffed oot wi' it. (fed up)

Comment from Helen C: Awright ya dobbers
Ford:
How dare she call us dobbers! Where's she getting it fae?

Question from Michael Harkins: What made you come up with the Big Jock sketch because that is a great sketch?
Greg:
We're just puppets. Hired hacks. It was Florence & Connell.

Question from Scott Morrison: Why is it, you're always drinking wine on the chats? Are you alchies or something?
Ford:
Cos we're a coupla wind-up widos.

Question from Jack Stewart: What's the best and worst thing about being a Scottish Celebrity?
Greg:
Aw, no, you're an ex-racing driver.
Ford:
You're the Le Mans man, you should know man.

Question from Stephen Taylor: What comedy programs do you watch to get your laughs?
Greg: Frasier and Larry Sanders and Seinfeld.
Ford:
Yeah and Sex and the City, Alan Partridge. Never the Fast Show…
Greg:
…or Smack the Pony.

Question from Burberry Boy: Isn’t CTF just a Scottish copy of The Fast Show?
Ford & Greg:
Yes, we've been outed by a Sassenach!

Question from Marie-Ann Johnstone: Wot time u on tonight?
Ford & Greg:
10.35pm on BBC1

Comment from Paddy Boy: Chewin the Fat is better than the Fast Show.

Question from Jabba: When are you playing live next ?
Ford:
In about half an hour when we get home.
Greg:
No plans for the moment. Next summer possibly.

Question from Lobby Dosser: Who's the funniest - WC Fields or the Marx Brothers?
Greg:
Excellent question. Marx Bros.
Ford:
WC Fields. I hate the xxxx Marx Brothers!

Question from Brian Morrow: Which one of you 2 got in a scrap at the Hampden heroes thing last year?
Greg:
That was me and Ford covered for me.

Question from Kevin Bishop: Are we going to see the return of the Big Man's mum in this series?
Ford:
I sincerely hope not. I don't want to do that again. The Comedy Unit are sticklers for detail and I had to wear the pants and the lot.

Question from Gazza Anderson: Can you mention my name on tonight’s show. My names Gary Anderson please?
Ford:
Aye, if we could go back 6 months in time!
Greg:
Yes, if your name's dobber!
Ford:
Aye, you'll get four mentions the night!

Question from Brian Morrow: Fair play any truth in the rumour that Denis Law called you a pr*ck?
Greg:
No, that was us that called him that.

Question from Chrissy Burt: The two o' yies in a square go, who gets battered?
Greg:
I would've thought that was fairly obvious.
Ford:
We're going down!

Question from Michael Harkins: Are we going to see more of Big Jock?
Ford:
Dunno. We might. We want to see more Captain Nipple Whistle. That's become a national trend.

Question from Scott Morrison: What do the mums of the kids that appear in Chewin the Fat say. They're always saying w*****!!
Greg:
We have to cast the net wide and find very liberal parents.
Ford:
We generally find them in Poland, cos they don't know what we're saying. We got into a lot of trouble in the old series saying , vank, vank, good guy.

Question from Bonnie Earl: What was it about the town of Greenock that inspired your new floral characters in the show?
Greg:
It's a place rich with comedy.
Ford:
It was the only sh***hole place in Scotland that we hadnae pointed up. ..
Greg:
…and it spawned Richard Wilson!

Question from Brian Morrow: I must say as somebody from Borrheid but who lives in Brum it's a laugh explaining the craic to my workmates.
Greg:
Thanks for trying.
Ford:
Just bail out, sit back, relax and enjoy it yerself.

Question from Jabba: Why aren't you drinking Fusilier?
Ford & Greg:
It's no early enough - it's never too early for a Fusilier.

Question from Rob Macaulay: Why no Karen on the chat?
Ford:
She's in Bermuda at the moment and she normally comes back before we shoot the next episode. It's a crazy mixed up show biz life, but that's the way she likes it.

Question from Kevin Bishop: You guys ever thought of doing the Wee Man? He could be the Big Man's son.
Ford:
Naw, we were actually thinking about doing just Medium Man.

Question from Chris: Hey guys, what sketch have you enjoyed the most?
Ford:
John Wayne's an ******** - last series.
Greg:
One that you haven't seen yet.

Question from Tracy: Are you just doing this chat for the free bevvie ???
Greg:
It isn't free - you paid for it!

Comment from Dinny You: I deal with a company in Bradford, and they are all fans....they laugh when I talk.. mibby that’s just me.

Question from Chris Elliot: Do you wonder aboot Glesgae for new material?
Ford:
Yes, we wonder about Glasgow!

Question from Ian Bowie: In your new series have you done any sketches involving Mosspark Bowling Club?
Ford: Naw, we've switched it for a new source of material - the golf club. Cos there's just as many a**holes there as in the bowling club.

Question from Nick Boogie: What do you think of the Welsh show Lucky Bag?
Ford:
Aye, it's no bad. The only problem is it's on that late that you're pished, but then you have to be to enjoy it.
Greg:
Aye it's good.

Question from Nick Boogie: Is it troo yer making a series based entirely on the wonderful game of scrabble?
Greg: No!
Ford:
Naw - gie's a scrabble, ya dobber!

Click here for more...

 

Why not join us over on Talk Scotland and talk about
your favourite sketches and characters?

 



About the BBC | Help | Terms of Use | Privacy & Cookies Policy