Burns Night 2006
Posted: Wednesday, 25 January 2006
If you want a lesser known Burns poem, how's this, a (rumoured, but apparently genuine) extempore when he was caught by the police vomiting off Leith docks after a drinking session: "My name is Robert Burns I stand on the docks at Leith Because my arse is blocked I'm sh*ting through my teeth." This is poetry by the National Bard and therefore can not possibly be offensive!
Sunny from Arran
Now we like our haggis, neeps and timorous beasties as much as the next bloggers, but Chrissie Mary and I fancied a change this year. We’ll be raising a glass of cheeky green Dounreay claret to Montgomery Burns from the Simpsons. Seemingly Mr Burns has Dell connections and will be touring Ness next summer scrounging free afternoon teas. Then we’ll be right up to the minute seeing that Peat Burns on Celebrity(?) Big Brother at 9.00 – provided the electric stays on. We’ll be having haggis en croute, guga Wellington and neeps gratin if I can get the Raeburn hot enough.
Annie B from Lone Sheiling
I wonder if what Rabbie would have thought of my attempt at ryme in the present day? New Labour O wid some Benefactor gie us Some money that wid maybe free us Fae oot this life o’ debt and pain And let us lift oor heid again Don’t get me wrong, I thought I’d mention We’re grateful for oor wee bit pension It keeps us gaun wae breid and butter But aye oor nose is in the gutter We struggle by as best we’re able Wae crumbs that’s fae oor maisters table We’re better off than some puir folk We dinnie drink, we dinnie smoke But surely life’s no worth a damn If ye can’t afford a wee bit dram Ma Faither was a Labour man and voted a’ his days But then their Socialistic plans were worthy o’ his praise But since New Labour’s taken ower yer feared tae open yer mooth You’ll maybe get flung in tae the Jile for shoutin’ oot the truth Before you vote for Tony Blair just think the risk yer takin’ If he gets away wae a’ his plans he’s Hitler in the making As fur his sidekick Gordon Broon a product o’ the Manse He’d be another Commissar if givin’ half a chance
stromhaggle from mainland Orkney