Jewish wedding rites
A cause for celebration
Sharon and Rob Starr ©
A Jewish wedding is one of the cornerstones of the Jewish life cycle and as with all religions, is a great cause for celebration. Although there are many laws and traditions associated with the wedding itself, other rituals take place in the weeks leading up to the big day.
In the past, it was common for Jewish marriages to be arranged by the parents, with the help of a match-maker, known as a Yenta, and some ultra-Orthodox communities still follow this practice today. Even though the union was arranged, the man still had to ask the father of the bride-to-be for his daughter's hand in marriage, and to secure the engagement by paying a dowry.
The rituals associated with Jewish weddings begin as soon as a couple are engaged, with a ceremony known as tena'im. It involves breaking a plate to symbolise the destruction of the temples in Jerusalem, as a reminder that even in the midst of celebration Jews still feel sadness for their loss. This is a theme that is repeated at the ceremony of itself with the breaking of the glass.
When to wed
The wedding itself can be held on any day of the week apart from during the Jewish Sabbath, which runs from sunset on Friday until sunset on Saturday, or on major Jewish festivals such as the Day of Atonement or Jewish New Year (when Jews are required to refrain from work). In the UK, Sunday is the most popular day for Jewish weddings to be held - in countries such as the US it is also common for weddings to be held on Saturday night after the Sabbath (this is more popular in the winter when Sabbath ends early). Ultra-Orthodox couples often hold ceremonies on weekdays.
There is no specific time of year when a wedding cannot take place, although many couples tend to avoid the period between the festivals of Pesach (Passover) and Shavuot which is known as the Omer and is a reflective and sad time in the Jewish calendar. As many people refrain from parties involving music and dancing during this period, it is not considered to be a good time to hold a wedding. However, this is more of an Orthodox tradition.
Published with permission from SomethingJewish.co.uk