Becoming a body language expert Would Like to Meet presenter Tracey Cox, made her name writing for Cosmopolitan in Australia and is one of the world's foremost writers on sex and relationships. But what motivated her to make her career as a sexpert?

In this article

How I got there How you can get there

Practical stuff Think outside of the square

One word of warning

I guess my first step on the road to becoming a flirt and body language 'expert' was being born blessed with a sister who worked in Family Planning. How's this relevant? Well, if you were forced to read pamphlets on how to put on a condom instead of teen magazines, you too would be completely unphased or embarrassed by anything at all to do with anyone's sex life or body.

At university I went on to do a degree in journalism and later added a psychology major. I suppose my parents' divorce (when I was 15) made me specialise in relationship therapy. Aside from that I've always been fascinated by the age-old questions of what makes one person sexy and another person not, when they're about the same level of attractiveness, and why we fancy the people we do, and does charisma/cool/the X factor really exist?

Unfortunately, you can't enrol in a degree which specialises exclusively in body language, though you can do a psychology degree which definitely covers it (as do some business degrees). If you want to avoid that route, you could try the following.

Start reading. This is still the best source for exploring and learning about body language. Use your local bookshop to help find work by authors like Alan Pease, Desmond Morris, Jan Hargrave and Gordon Wainwright.

Any good bookshop will have a selection of books on flirting and body language. Some are quite heavy and technical, concentrating more on business. Others focus exclusively on dating techniques. Buy one good reference book for the basics, then one or two others which take your fancy. This will help you decide which particular area of body language you're interested in focusing on.

As to how to make a living from all this new-found knowledge, well, here is where I'm a bit stumped. There's not exactly a plethora of vacancies for body language experts on telly. But there are a good number of body language/communication coaches who make a healthy living advising business people and addressing conferences. And it's an area which is growing fast.

My best advice would be to apply it to another passion in your life and see where that takes you. Because body language applies to virtually all situations, body language coaches will eventually do everything from help teenagers get jobs, to teach doctor's how to improve their bedside manner. In other words, instead of searching for a job which you think would be perfect for you, create your own. That way you know it will be!

There's one other thing you need to become a body language expert: along with knowledge and experience, you need a very thick skin! Tell people that's what you do and you'll see real terror shine in their eyes. They literally freeze, scared to move a muscle or bat an eyelash in case you're analysing them. Add the titles 'psychologist' and 'sexpert' to the resume, as in my case, and it's not surprising most people leg it if I come within 60 paces.