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1 December 2009
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Sensual touching techniques

By discovering how responsive your bodies are to certain sensations you and your partner can heighten your potential for sexual arousal. Psychosexual therapist Paula Hall describes an exercise to help you do just this.


Preparation

  • This exercise should take an hour, so leave yourself enough time.
  • Before you start you could prepare your space.
  • You'll be naked, so put on the heating an hour before so you'll be warm enough.
  • Collect some different textured objects (soft, silky, smooth, warm, cool etc).

The partner being touched

Lie naked on a bed or wherever's comfortable. If you're brave enough, you can be blindfolded to heighten the experience.

The secret of success is to make sure you're lost in the moment. Allow yourself to feel every sensation to the full by thinking of nothing else. Remember to give feedback to the toucher.

The partner doing the touching

Before you start, you could use an old-fashioned hairpin to find your partner's non-genital erogenous zones. Slowly run the hairpin over their body. Most of the time they'll only feel one point of contact, but on the highly sensitive erogenous zones they'll feel both.

It's your job to provide a wide range of different stimuli for your partner to experience. Work from head to toe experimenting with a range of different objects and textures.

Try using a silk scarf or a soft blusher brush. Can your partner tell the difference between suede, leather and velvet? How about rubber or a feather? Now try touching with a massage roller or ball.

Experiment with different pressures and different strokes too. Heighten the sensory expectation by making random rather than predictable movements.

Remember to ask what feels good and what feels best.

When you've had enough, swap roles. But be warned - it could be a long night!


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