Confessions: The Seaside Bus Trip

Twenty years ago, when Simon was a whippersnapper presenter on BBC Radio 1, he received thousands of letters from listeners confessing their darkest secrets and worst misdemeanours, begging for his forgiveness. Every day, Father Mayo read out a confession - and then he'd decide whether to grant forgiveness or not.

Now Confessions is back on BBC Radio 2 Drivetime. Read a Confession below, then Send Simon Your Confession


Many years ago I joined the fire brigade with a semi automatic bus licence. A colleague on the same watch, also had a manual licence and was driving regularly for a local company for a bit of extra cash. He came to me one March and asked if I would help him out with a pensioner trip to Eastbourne if he drove the coach and I drove the double decker. I readily agreed, as I needed the money, a fireman's pay was pretty low.

We set off and duly arrived after several hours drive at our appointed destination. The two coach parties split up and arranged to meet back at the coach park later in the day, for one reason or another we never did.

Despite the non stop humour and barrels of beer consumed the miserable rain swept Eastbourne all day till the sun set. My lot were fairly well oiled when I finally managed to steer the staggering grey nomads back to a now deserted coach park. On the way we passed a bench where an old man lay snoring his head off. One of my party said "Ere thats old Eric from Stokes Lane, I bet they've gone without 'im! "

Not wanting to spoil his day we lifted the slumbering old man into the bus and onto back seat of the lower deck where he slept all the way back.

We all agreed to get Eric home first so I took the Double decker right up to his door and we helped him up the path. We rung the door bell for sometime but failed to get an answer so we searched his pockets and found a front door key. Lifting a now stirring Eric carefully onto his front room couch we put a blanket over him, left the fire on and closed the front door behind us.

As we walked down the path a window opened in the neighbours house. A voice from out of the dark shouted ' You wont find anybody in, Eric and Peggy are in Eastbourne for a fortnight!!

Forgive me Simon. Well how was I to know? I'm off to Arabia now for a year to let the dust settle.

Edward The Confessor

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