Scott Mills Money Dilemmas game - text version


Scott: Hi, I'm Scott Mills. You may know me from such things as Scottcam, The National Lottery, and Hole in the Wall.

You're about to take part in an amazing test of your financial intelligence. We want to find out how savvy you are when it comes to splashing the cash.

Check out these potentially award-winning scenes that give you an insight into my world...

SCENE 1 - The car dealer

[Scott is standing by a sky-blue 'H' reg car admiring the paint-work and interior. A dodgy-looking bloke approaches him]

Glenn: Hello there sir, fancy having a look at what this beauty can do?

Scott: Yes - I don't know a lot about cars but she looks like a real goer.

Glenn: Well let me tell you about what she can do. Check the suspension out on this eh? Give the tyres a kick, go on, go on! It's even got a sunroof. Lets light in and everything. It's even got a boot!

Scott: How much would you be looking for it?

Glenn: Well in a few years' time she'll be a classic. So I'd be looking at at least ten grubby hands and a pony. That's £10,025 to you, mate.

Scott: Mmmm that sounds quite reasonable - Just over ten grand for an 'H' reg nearly classic. Let me see what I've got on me right now...

[Scott freezes as he puts his hand in his pocket and looks to camera]

[Westwood voice-over]: Oh My Gosh, Scott's in a real quandary on this one. He's been looking for a sky-blue coloured car for ages and knows it'll wow the crowds when he rocks up in that baby. It's a unique once-in-a-lifetime find, but should he pay full whack to secure the deal, or risk haggling?

What would you do? - Buy car // Haggle with dealer

Buy car

[Westwood voice-over]: Scott really wants that car so in his mind it was worth it. But he could have done his homework before leaving home to see if he was paying market value.

Haggle with dealer

[Westwood voice-over]: Over ten grand for an 'H' reg car sounds a bit steep. It's always worth checking to see if you can get a better deal.

Scott: Do you know what, I'm gonna go away and have a think about it.

[Scott goes to walk away but dealer stops him]

Glenn: Woah woah woah, ok, I tell you what. It's your lucky day. Since the cassette player's broken, I'll give it to you for a grand.

Scott:Mmmm I'm not sure. Has it got one of those cup holder things?

Glenn: No. But don't let that be the deal breaker. How about $£100?

Scott: I tell you what, I'll give you a tenner if you throw in your sheepskin coat.

Glenn: Deal.

[Scott and dealer shake hands. Glenn takes off coat and hands to Scott].

You'll need that coz the heater doesn't work.

[Scott puts coat on, gets in driver's seat and starts car looking pleased with himself]

[Shot of car dealer as we hear Scott drive off with car backfiring, grating gears etc]

Glenn: You might want to check that exhaust!

SCENE 2 - The Cafe

[Scott sitting at table in a cafe having a cuppa. Becky walks in armed full of stuff that she's got free with her new mobile phone. She shouts over to Scott whilst filming him on her new mobile]

Scott: What's all that lot?

Becky: It's 'mazin'. I've just been to that new Ring Now Pay Later shop and they've sorted me out with a phone and all this lot.

Scott: So what's the deal?

Becky: Well I got a rubber duck, signed photos of the Hoff, a cuddly toy, a horse, an umberella and this amazing dollar sign.

Scott: Wow, that sound 'mazin'. And you only pay 30 quid a month?

Becky: Yeah - you pay £30 per month for the first month... Then that goes up £10 per month for the next three months... After that, £50 per month on months with 30 days in them, £60 per month for months with 31 days. And here's the really good bit - on months with only 28 days in them, it drops back down to £30 per month. Mazin'. You should do it.

Scott: Wow that is good. All that for just £30 per month. I've always wanted a massive rubber duck as well. I wonder...

[Westwood voice over]: Everywhere you look these days, someone seems to be offering free gifts and incentives. What should Scott do - sign on the dotted line or go giftless?

What would you do? - Get phone // Don't get phone

Get phone

[Westwood voice over]: Damn, I've been looking for one of those everywhere. But with the payments spread out over a year, I could probably buy ten of them. Get a calculator and do your sums.

Don't get phone

[Westwood voice over]: Probably the wisest move - it gives you a bit of time to work out if you're really getting something for nothing.

Scott: The thing is, Becky, I don't understand a word of what you've just said so I think I'm gonna stick with my old phone, but thanks anyway.

[Phone rings and Scott takes out a massive old mobile that looks like a brick]

SCENE 3 - Coffee

[Scott is giving a presentation and pointing at a bar graph illustrating his shade of tan]

Scott: I tell you what, why don't we have a coffee break and come back to this? Jemma can you take down what people want? I'll have a frappa crappa Harry Redknappaccino.

Becky: I'll have a triple caf decaf whipped cream soya with double extra egg nog.

Anna: Can I have a mocha chopper cherry popper.

Scott: And the one who doesn't speak - what do you want?

[The One Who Doesn't Speak holds up paper with 'tea' written on it]

Jemma: Do they just do normal coffee?

Scott: No they don't.

Jemma: Okay, I'll have what he's having [points at The One Who Doesn't Speak]

Scott: So whose round is this?

All: Yours.

[Camera zooms in on Scott's look of horror]

[Westwood voice over]: Scott's got a tough decision to make. His team really really like the coffee from Mr Cappucilatte's coffee shop and they're all expecting Scott to pay, but there's a perfectly good coffee machine in the office. If you were Scott, what would you do?

What would you do? - Coffee shop // coffee machine

Coffee shop

[Westwood voice-over]: Okay, so the coffee might not taste so good from the machine but if Scott spent that much every day on coffee alone, it would come to nearly £100 a week. That's £400 a month. That's £4,800 a year.

Coffee machine

[Scott walks round to the coffee machine. He spots some Mr Cappucilatte cups in the bin and uses them .We see a shot of Scott's cheeky face holding an old Mr Cappucilatte cup].

SCENE 4 - The Dalek

[Scott is on his own at home browsing the internet]

Scott: Ooh Dr Spock ears, current bid £2,000... One pair of David Hasselhoff swimming trunks as worn on Baywatch. Evidence of use. Current bid £3.99. Nah got a pair already.

Now this looks good - second-hand, life-sized Dalek, as used in the episode Revenge of the Cyborg Spatula Infadels. Buy it now for $£3,259.86

[calls the number on the screen on his mobile]

Scott: Hi I'm enquiring about your Dalek. Could you give me some more information about it?

...good working order... full service history... five months left on MOT... not very good on stairs... answers to the name of Raymond

Do you know what, that sounds like a bargain, just let me find my credit card.

[as Scott reaches for his card, he spots the holiday brochure he's been browsing and remembers that holiday in Thailand he's been dreaming of. Scott freezes deep in thought]

[Westwood voice over:] That's a mighty fine looking Dalek, and from my favourite episode. But even on his wage, there's no way Scott can afford the Dalek and the holiday he's been trying to save for. If you were Scott, what would you do?

What would you do? - Buy Dalek // Don't buy dalek

Buy Dalek

[Westwood voice-over]: The Dalek would have been a great addition to Scott's bedroom but if he really wants that holiday in the Thailand, he needs to avoid buying on impulse.

Don't Buy Dalek

[Westwood voice over]: That holiday to Thailand obviously means a lot to Scott as the Dalek temptation didn't get to him. He'll be thankful when he's lying on the beach having saved up and avoided the impulse buy.

Scott [speaking on phone]: Actually on second thoughts I'm gonna leave it. I'm saving up to go to Thailand, and those corrective surgery holidays don't come cheap.

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