Music Played11 items
John Parr St Elmo's Fire (Man In Motion)
Now 1985 - The Millennium Series, EMI
Amy Winehouse Our Day Will Come
Lioness: Hidden Treasures, Island, 1
David Bowie Life On Mars
David Bowie - Best Of Bowie, EMI
Cee Lo Green Anyway
Ladykiller: Platinum Edition, Warner Bros, 1
The Only Ones Another Girl, Another Planet
John Peel Right Time, Wrong Speed 1977-1987 (Various Artists), Warner Music TV
Paula Cole Where Have All The Cowboys Gone?
(CD Single), Warner Bros
Will Young Come On
Echoes, RCA, 1
ABBA Under Attack
The Singles (The First Ten Years), Epic, 1
Ella Fitzgerald I've Got You Under My Skin
The Incomparable Ella, Polydor
Jazz Showstopper Choice
OPTION A : Sade – Your Love Is King
OPTION B : Ella Fitzgerald – I’ve Got You Under My Skin
OPTION C : Mongo Santamaria - Watermelon Man
OPTION D : Randy Crawford – You Might Need Somebody
Text the word ‘JAZZ’ plus your choice A, B, C or D – with NO GAPS - to 88291. Texts are charged at your standard message rate.
Voting closes at 6.45pm.
Join Jamie Cullum for the best in jazz after 7.
Confession: Anyone In There?
I throw myself at the feet of the truly gorgeous Mother Superior....and the others, for something I did in my late teen years way back in 1968.
At the time my friend and I were very much into competitive rapid
river canoe slalom competitions and travelled the country most week-
ends attending events. On this occasion, with no competitions on, we decided to visit a beautiful river for a weekend practice. Come the Sunday and time to go home we decided to have a pint in a pub before our journey. Down the road from the pub was a public car park where we had left the car whilst canoeing on the River....
After our drink, we walked to the car. I decided as there was a public toilet in the car park, and the pub was way back up the road, to do the necessary there, rather than stop on the way home.
The toilets were 'quaint'....In the Gents was one cubicle and nothing
else. This was occupied. So, as time was pushing on and so was my
bladder, I ventured into the ladies and called "Hello, anyone there?"...No
reply. So, as my eyes were starting to water a bit I decided to quickly enter the hallowed portals and just as quickly leave!
Inside were just two cubicles, I quickly entered one....No sooner had
I locked the cubicle door when a vehicle drew up and I heard ladies’
voices...No time to escape, so I sat down to await developments, so
to speak! One lady went into the next door cubicle, but the other tried my
door.....and I froze.
Realising it must be occupied, she entered into a conversation with her
friend. Then, they duly swopped places. Then horror on horror more ladies
came in and tried my door. As I sat there, I could sense a very impatient queue forming right outside my door.....
Words were being exchanged that someone was in 'That' cubicle for far
too long..."Are you alright, dear?" someone enquired. Puberty was long gone so I couldn't even attempt to reply in a convincing high pitched voice, so I kept quiet.
If someone had had the presence of mind to look under the door, they
would have seen a pair of hairy legs stuck inside a pair of size 9
walking boots! So completely trapped and to my abject embarrassment, I had to sit through far too many 'performances' than a young lad should have to endure!
But many of the ladies couldn't wait. And so while I was in the ladies, I am told, they marched into the gents, turfed some poor lad out on his ear, and commandeered the cubicle where did they what they had to do. For a good 20 minutes. Any man that tried to get near felt the full wrath of their frustration and had no choice but to retreat to the nearest bush.
Eventually after much grumbling, the ladies left both sides of the building and no one else came in and I head the vehicle depart. I took my chance and ran out into the car park to find my 'mate' nearly dying with laughter.
He explained that as soon as I went in the ladies, a coach arrived
full of elderly ladies and those who wanted to use the facilities
So that, dear collective is my confession. I ask forgiveness not from one, but a dozen or so angels. For after all the time I've been bearing this guilt, that is what they surely will be by now. I fear, when my own time comes and I am not forgiven, they will be waiting for me, umbrellas at the ready and retribution will be swift and painful.
Your obedient servant ( to Mother Superior anyway! )