Episode 1

Neil Morrissey was just 10 years old when he was sent into care. After thirty years of wondering, he has finally decided to confront his past. In this first episode, Neil begins a journey which will see him venture back into his childhood in the hope of learning how this experience has truly affected him as an adult.

Neil's journey centres on a drive to understand the reasons why he was taken into care. Although, in his own words he'd always been a 'scallywag', Neil questions if this was enough to separate him from parents and brothers. Frustrated by 'the system', Neil finally gets to see the records which were written during his time in care.

He travels back to Penkhull Children's Home in Stoke-on-Trent where he lived for the majority of his teenage years. With so many young people in care, now thirty years on Neil is keen to trace some of his 'care home colleagues'.

Neil manages to trace some of his contemporaries, Geraldine and Paulette, who arrived at Penkhull to escape an abusive environment at home. For the first time Neil learns what these two women had experienced as young children.

Looking so closely at his own past and experiences has raised many questions about what life must be like for young people in care today. In East Lothian, Neil meets residents and workers at Lothian Villa. Resident Jade has lived at the Villa for around 18 months after being abandoned by her mother. Neil spends time with Jade learning about life in the modern-day care home and reflecting on how it compares with his own childhood.