1958 - Born in hospital in Bolton.
1963 - 1976 Goes to Bolton School in blazer.
1976 - 1979 Goes to Manchester University doing English and American Studies. Buys book.
1979 - 1983 Works as producer at Manchester's Piccadilly Radio. Buys Ford Escort.
1983 - 1985 Works as producer at Radio One, London working on magazine programmes, outside broadcasts and John Peel. Buys bomber jacket.
1985 - 1986 Works as Head of Music for Piccadilly Radio. Discovers inherent unsuitability for management roles. Buys Media Guardian every Monday looking for new job.
1986 Joins BBC Manchester to produce Radio One and Two programmes including 'The Organist Entertains'. Buys Casio keyboard.
1990 Presents Hit The North for BBC Radio 5. Buys chutney.
1991 Presents Out on Blue Six and The Guest List for Radio One. Buys terraced house near Stockport.
1997 Briefly presents Radio One Breakfast Show with Marc Riley. Discovers unsuitability for early shifts.
Buys time. Moves to Radio One afternoon show. Stays for nearly seven years. Wins three Sony Awards. Buys convertible. Makes two 'smash hit' albums with The Shirehorses. Publishes memoirs of life in crap bands: "Showbusiness - Diary of a rock 'n' roll nobody".
2004 Joins Radio 2 to host late night show. Receives two Sony nominations. Buys bottle of Night Nurse.
2005 Publishes first novel: "Northern Sky". Makes three albums with The Family Mahone.
2006 Career highlight as Mark wins "Celebrity Stars in their eyes" with a suspiciously Cornish Shane MacGowan.
2007 Takes pity on Stuart Maconie and agrees to share early eveing show. Buys a round.
2009 Publishes best-selling book of memoirs: 'Thank You For The Days' and holds hands with Stuart as they frolic the length of Hadrian's Wall.
Wins yet another Sony Gold Award as he is crowned 'Best Music Broadcaster' at a well posh ceremony in that there London.
2010 Forms r'nb band The Big Figures and goes on tour with one of his childhood heroes, Wilko Johnson of Dr Feelgood.
Skips gaily along 100 miles of the Jurassic Coast with that other fella off the radio.
2011 Records first solo album at the age of 53 and publishes yet another book titled 'Reeling in the Years', detailing the soundtrack to his half century on God's good earth. The biopic must surely now be an inevitability. Launches the award-winning* bespoke record show 'Mark Radcliffe's Music Club'. Oh, and moves to BBC Radio 6 Music. Remarkably, they don't seem to have found him out yet.
Along the way has three daughters and continues to support Manchester City. Buys season ticket.