The People's Manifesto

The full People's Manifesto as voted for by the audience of Mark Thomas: The Manifesto

Since 2009, Mark Thomas has been heading back and forth across the UK, from Devon to Glasgow and many places in between, to gather your suggestions for his People's Manifesto.

Each policy was voted on by the audience using a 'single, transferable shout' (most people chose to use the word 'aye') with the policy with the loudest show of support (or policies when overwhelming support was given for more than one suggestion) being added to the People's Manifesto.

In series 1, the people proposed and approved the following:

  • Water to be valued as a commodity, with the BBC banning bottled water
  • Any war that lasts for more than five years should be declared a draw

In series 2, we were given more episodes and were able to get serious with your suggestions, which were:

  • Re-instate ‘Saint Monday’ – the tradition of taking Mondays off
  • Include a ‘none of the above’ option on election voting cards
  • Bankers’ bonuses used to pay off our mortgages and buy-to-let houses being released for council housing
  • Anyone taking a domestic flight in the UK should be made to walk the return journey home
  • Government to reclaim the buildings that have been sold ‘offshore’ in ownership under the Private Finance Initiative (and then we invade Jersey)

Then in series 3, things became a bit more abstract. You wanted:

  • To legalise the use of free recreational drugs for senior citizens
  • All politicians to use public transport, the NHS and send their kids to state schools
  • Deem elections void if a political party breaks over 50% of their election pledges
  • To make anyone who works on public transport to wear a cape as part of their uniform
  • To call of the surrender of any unused fruit from garden trees compulsory – this produce would be used in communal jam and chutney making
  • To have the theme from Jaws to be played anytime a Conversative MP talks on TV

We attempted to beat the bankers and get ourselves a seat in the House of Lords in Series 4, passing:

  • Every citizen to be given £10,000 worth of vouchers to spend over six months rather than giving the money to the banks as part of quantitive easing – the argument being that we would actually spend it and the banks would not
  • The House of Lords should be elected by a public lottery with everyone able to ‘have a go’ if one of the 2,000 strong members selected.
  • A campaign to demonise spoons in order to make teenagers feel cool when reducing knife crime
  • A general anti-avoidance tax rule that means companies trying to avoid corporation tax by going offshore are breaking the law and can be held to account – in other words, 'we could finally sue Goldman Sachs'
  • Space Hopper Tuesday; if you live two miles or less from your place or work or education, you have to use a space hopper to travel home
  • Bank charges abolished for families with a combined household income of £30,000 or less
  • Limit and regulate payday loan companies
  • Roll out ‘Scotcash’ style lending where borrowers only incur setup charges

And most recently, here’s what we’ve added in Series 5:

  • The Shipping Forecast to be read out in multiple regional accents
  • Anyone walking a dog must dispose of any dog mess they encounter
  • The ntroduction of a national minimum wage of £10
  • Britain’s roads to be painted the colours they are in the A-Z
  • A GCSE in lying to be created
  • Everyone to be given all the land they can run around in one minute
  • Only one person from any school (such as Eton) can serve in the Cabinet at any time
  • Rustle-free zones introduced to cinemas, theatres and other public entertainment spaces, to be policed by 'cinema ninjas'
  • Any profits made by MPs who have interest in private heathcare companies to be given to patients on the NHS waiting list.

And, in Mark Thomas's own words, 'thus endeth the Manifesto'.