The Dark Lord is celebrating the pantomime season - in a way that only he can - by inviting you to play his 'Panto Lotto'.
So, all you have to do is check your local press to see who's starring in your nearest pantomime, see how many numbers you get off the list below, and let Alex know how you do!
You can get in touch via Alex's Contact page
1) A CURRENT soap star
2) A FORMER (i.e unemployed) soap star
3) CURRENT Australian (or similar) soap star
4) FORMER Australian (or similar) soap star. (i.e. unemployed but maybe claiming benefits in the UK.)
5) Reality TV star
6) Reality TV show winner.
7) Gladiator (extra points if it’s ‘Wolf’ as that is the only one anyone remembers)
8) Faded pop star
9) Faded pop band
10) Faded pop band with original members. Not just the drummer.
11) Faded pop band but with the original singer
12) A Puppet - like Sooty, a Care Bear or even a Tellytubby
13) An advertising - generated ‘personality’ e.g. Churchill the dog and Barry Scott from the Cillit Bang ads.
14) Speciality act such as ventriloquist, juggler or conjuror
15) Live animals - like performing dogs or Shetland ponies to pull the carriage in 'Cinderella'
16) TV Personality without a purpose. e.g. Geoff Capes - who was known only for being strong!
17) Local Radio DJ
18) Regional TV personality
19) Long forgotten TV comedy star so that the bill has to read "Of TV' s...." as everyone has forgotten who they were. e.g "Anna Karen of TV' s 'On The Buses'"
20) Bewildered American film/TV star doing it for the money although they will hail it as a "great Briddish art form." e.g. Henry Winkler or Pamela Anderson.
21) "Serious" British actor doing it to show their lighter side and to "extend their range" e.g. Sir Ian McKellan or Patrick Stewart.
22) TV Double acts like the Krankies, Cannon and Ball, or even Ant and Dec.
23) Any inanimate novelty, such as ‘The Dancing Waters’
24) Maximum points for a show using the description ‘Traditional’ - as this means they can't afford any stars at all.