Anger, Fighting & Aggression

We all get angry sometimes. But it's important to be able to control your anger before you do something you regret.

The first step is to try and uncover what is really making us angry

Aaaarrrgghhhhh!

Everyone gets angry. It's a normal, healthy emotion.

We generally learn to control our anger as we grow up, but some people find it difficult to keep their anger under control.

Anger itself is a normal emotion

It is ok to feel this but acting out of anger can be dangerous and holding on to the feeling of anger for a long time and not learning how to manage it can be bad for our health…

People who get angry get headaches, high blood pressure and anxiety more often than the more relaxed among us.

So why is it happening?

Many modern day issues can contribute to anger. A family breakdown, exam stress or relationship difficulties are all things that can contribute to anger - but there are many more reasons.

The first step is to try and uncover what is really making us angry. Once you have figured out the cause it might be good to talk to someone about it. Whatever it is that's making you cross, it's very unlikely that you are the only person to have ever been annoyed by it.

Between 2011 and 2012 Childline had nearly 5000 phone calls from young people who were worried about their anger. By talking it through with someone (a friend, a parent, a GP, or a teacher) you might be able to work out how to avoid situations that make your blood boil, and recognise the signs that show you're getting angry. Then you can work on taking steps to control anger more generally.

What can I do to control my anger?

People try many things to manage their anger and different things work for different people. Here are some tips that could help

  • Recognise the warning signs. Some days we are just on edge, and that's ok.
  • You could explore what things tend to make you calmer, such as deep breaths, taking a walk or listening to music.
  • Detox the brain. Alcohol, cigarettes and drugs can make us more edgy. Also ensure you're getting enough sleep.
  • If you feel the anger boiling up, force yourself to breathe and count to 10.
  • Do the things that make you happy. Dancing, art, reading, walking, or just jumping around to your favourite song may help!

If you feel you need more help, see your GP. There are anger management courses, counselling and other options available.

BBC Advice factfiles are here to help young people with a broad range of issues. They're based on advice from medical professionals, government bodies, charities and other relevant groups. Follow the links for more advice from these organisations.

This factfile was updated on 2 August 2017

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