My World game

Use the link below to launch the game and follow the instructions.

Your child's sense of belonging

A strong and varied circle of support creates a child with plenty of resilience or 'bounce back', that is a strong sense of security, knowledge of where they fit in and an ability to enjoy their achievements and keep any disappointments in perspective.

Remember your child's answers will be based on how they feel at this very moment. If they_ve just fallen out with their best friend or been told off by you then this will alter where they put people in their circles of support. Don_t panic if you're nowhere to be found, this may mean they_re temporarily annoyed with you.

This game should be enjoyable - it isn't meant to prove some people are more important, overall, than others to your child.

Toys

For all-round development your child will benefit from a range of toys to stimulate them in different areas. If only one or two items are dominating your child's circle, think about the following ways to introduce toy and activity ideas:

• To stimulate your child's imagination - puppets, make-believe kitchens and shops, dolls and action figures and dressing-up games.
• To develop fine motor coordination - construction toys, arts and crafts activities, musical instruments.
• To develop motor coordination - outdoor games, bat and ball games, dance mats, musical statues and bumps.
• To develop social skills - board games, card games, charades, storytelling games, hide and seek.

Making and keeping friends is an important skill to develop. Of course some children are very self-contained and happy without a special friend, but if the exercise has revealed that they'd like to boost their friendships, the following pointers may help.

To build up new friendships:

• Encourage your child to have friends over to play.
• Make your home welcoming by creating a space to play, where friends can make a noise and not be interrupted by brothers or sisters.
• Have activities around for your child and their friend to play together: try baking, or playing snap, picture dominoes or simple board games.
• Get to know other parents so you're comfortable with your child going to other homes to play.
• Help your child to explore hobbies and out-of-school activities, such as Beavers, Rainbows, sports groups and school clubs. They'll meet a new group of children with similar interests and many groups actively foster cooperation and teamwork which build friendships.

If the exercise has revealed any concerns about your child's friendships then talk to the staff at your child's school because they can help to build up relationships.

To develop social skills

Good social skills will help your child to build friendships. Here are some ways on how to develop these skills in your child:

• Encourage them to talk about their feelings at home and understand the feelings of others.
• Good friends put others first so encourage your child to let their friends make some choices.
• The urge to be first is very important from about six years old, so encourage your child to let others go first in activities. For example, to have the first turn on the swing, to act out the princess in a play or have the strongest action figure or largest dinosaur in make-believe games.
• If your child is shy you could practice together how to approach other children and ask to join in.
• Practise some games or activities at home so your child has something to offer, such as being able to teach friends a new game.

Problems with friendships

The exercise may have given your child the opportunity to tell you about problems they're having with friends or school mates.

It's perfectly normal for the best of friends to fall out at times. If this is happening comfort your child and support them but try not to interfere.

Friends will often make up within hours or days. If the falling out lasts longer then encourage your child to invite over and play with other friends, as well as gently prompting them to include their old friends too.

If your child continues to be distressed then consider whether they're being bullied.

Being part of a loving and responsive family is crucial to the growth of your child's sense of security, confidence and resilience.

Tips for building closeness between parent and child

1. Whether your child loves to cuddle up with you and read a story, or just enjoys holding your hand while you're out, these small times of physical closeness mean a lot in your relationship.

2. When you eat together, ask about their day, help them to make something or play a game together. These are times when your child really knows they're the centre of your attention, important to you above all else. These need not be long periods of time. Even a few minutes of positive attention concentrated on them will build your closeness. Fit more of these times into your day and you'll feel the bond growing closer.

3. Your child will want your approval and attention even at times when you're busy. If they come up and attract your attention try to stop what you're doing and listen to them - even for a brief period.

4. Think about how you speak to your child, notice your expression, tone of voice and how loudly you speak, these all make a difference to whether the communication is received as warm and caring or annoyed and demanding.

5. Take a look in the mirror and check out your facial expression, do you look warm and loving, stressed and anxious, angry or sad? Try to relax your face, (thinking of a loving moment will help), and then show that face to your child when you speak with them.

6. If you feel you raise your voice more than you'd like to, try changing your communication pattern. When you want to talk go right up close to your child, crouch down to their level, say their name and then start to communicate in a soft, calm voice.

7. Much of what you say to your children is probably instruction. For example: "Please do your homework", which doesn't leave a lot of room for closeness. If you want to increase closeness ensure you have plenty of chats just for the sake of them, and that you say more positive things to your child than negative things.

8. Take care of yourself. If you see yourself as a slave to your family or without space to be yourself then you may feel resentful of the time they need. Every day do at least one thing that you enjoy. Simple things such as reading a magazine or the paper, chatting on the internet or watching a favourite TV programme can make a lot of difference. Have some adult time with your partner or friends. Go out for some conversation or entertainment on a regular basis to recharge your batteries.

Brothers and sisters can be wonderful companions and the worst of enemies, all in the same day. If your child places their brother or sister on the outer circles in the game then try and encourage your children to play together, for example set up games which suit all ages, or start a project they can all join in with. Read our article on sibling relationships for more practical ideas.

See CBBC for arts and crafts ideas for all the family.

Your wider family, such as grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins can give your child a strong sense of belonging and security through knowing that there are many people who care for them and they can turn to.

For many families there can be challenges to keeping in touch with relatives; you may live far away from each other or find it difficult to meet regularly through ill health or busy lifestyles.

Creative ways to build closeness within the wider family

1. Have family gatherings whenever you can - face-to-face contact is the strongest way to build the bonds between family members.

2. Create a positive atmosphere for a get-together by having a reason to meet, perhaps to celebrate a birthday or play games.

3. Set aside any adult differences of opinion so your children can build bonds with the wider family. Family gatherings can sometimes bring together people who do not get along or who simply enjoy a good argument. Agree to keep any conflict away from family time so children can really enjoy being with all their relatives.

4. Find creative ways to keep contact with relatives, including sending cards for special events, such as grandparent's day and birthdays and postcards when you're on holiday.

5. Display photographs of relatives in your home and send pictures of your own family regularly to others.

6. If there's family conflict, perhaps after parents break up, keep photographs and mementoes of the non-resident parent around. Children need reminders of both parents even when hard feelings between adults make this uncomfortable.

7. Discover your family history by encouraging children to spend time with the older generation listening to stories of family events, fashion, music and what the world was like without the internet, DVDs and video games. Try some projects with your children, such as drawing a family tree or putting together a scrapbook recording different places your family has lived or jobs they've all done. This will add detail to the family relationships you're fostering.