It takes time to come to turns with having a premature or sick baby. You may be shocked by the amount of equipment in the special care unit, but much of it's used to monitor breathing, heart rate and temperature. Ask the staff to explain what each piece of equipment is for. Bonding with your babyA baby in special care tends to sleep much of the time, and it can be difficult to feel you're doing anything for her, but there's plenty you can do. - Hold your baby as much as you can, skin to skin. In some units you'll be encouraged to give 'kangaroo care', which means your baby is tucked up against you, feeling your warmth, hearing your heartbeat and smelling your scent. Babies held like this have been shown to gain weight more quickly than those left in their cots or incubators.
- Express breastmilk for your baby. She can take this by syringe, tube, cup or bottle. Breastmilk reduces the risk of infection and nourishes your baby as it's especially suited to her needs. Some babies need more breastmilk than you can produce and they may be able to have donated human milk, or pre-term formula.
- Talk and sing to your baby quietly. Whether she's asleep or awake, she'll be calmed by hearing your voice. She's heard your and your partner's voices in the uterus and should know it's you.
Why are some babies premature?Sometimes, there's no obvious reason for premature labour. Some possibilities are: - The baby isn't growing well because the placenta isn't nourishing her properly
- The mother may have an infection
- Twins or triplets may stretch the uterus because of the extra size and weight, triggering contractions (you may be advised to be induced and not wait for labour to start)
- A weakness in the cervix means it won't stay closed
If you think you're in labour - because contractions start, your waters break or you're bleeding - contact the hospital. If your labour is very early, you may be able to stall it for a while with drugs. Premature babies are at risk of respiratory distress syndrome (RDS). Giving the mother injections of corticosteroid drugs can reduce the risk of this happening, as they help the baby's lungs mature. Sometimes, premature labour is induced. This might happen if it's thought the baby has a better chance of survival outside the uterus or if the mother has a condition such as severe pre-eclampsia or eclampsia. Babies with disabilitiesIf your baby's disabled, it's important you discuss your feelings with others. You're likely to feel a range of emotions, from love to anger, which is understandable, but it's important you're aware of your baby's immediate and future prospects. You can ask for help from: - Your GP, health visitor or hospital paediatrician
- Your local social services departments, which should have information about useful organisations
Remember, you're not the only parent in the world with a disabled child. Many organisations have self-help groups run by parents - see Support for you. Talking to other parents in a similar situation could help you determine how you approach the long-term development and care of your child.

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