| Have you heard the one about...? |
What do you call Santa's little helpers?
Subordinate clauses!
John Crofts
|
What did baby corn say to mummy corn?
Where's popcorn? |
What's white and goes up?
A confused snowflake |
What has 22 legs and 2 wings but can't fly?
A football team |
What sort of sentence would you get if you broke the law of gravity?
A suspended one! |
How do snowmen get around?
They ride an icicle |
How do monkeys make toast?
Stick some bread under the gorilla! |
How do witches tell the time?
With a witch-watch! |
What do you get if you cross a cowboy with an octopus?
Billy the squid! |
What do you get if you cross a hen with a bedside clock?
An alarm cluck! |
What song did Cinderella sing as she waited four months for her photos to come back from the chemist?
'Some day my prints will come!' |
What's grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow?
An elephant rolling down a hill with a daisy in its mouth! |
Why do women have orgasms?
It gives them one extra reason to moan. |
What is Santa's favourite pizza?
One that's deep pan, crisp and even |
Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy!
|
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations?
Tinsilitis! |
Why did the golfer wear an extra pair of trousers?
In case he got a hole in one |
What do you call just married spiders?
Newly-webs |
Why did the tightrope walker visit his bank?
To check his balance |
Why was the Egyptian boy confused?
Because his daddy was a mummy |
What kind of paper likes music?
(W)rapping paper. |
