CHAIN
LETTERS - INTERNET
HARMLESS FUN OR EMOTIONAL ABUSE?
The internet has transformed
our lives but there are few controls of what’s on it, and children
are particularly at risk of finding unsuitable information. Now
chain letters are on the net. And like the old chain letter that
came in the post, people are still nervous that if they don’t
pass them on, they might attract bad luck.
A clinical psychologist On Your Behalf describes them as
psychological abuse. We ask who sends them? And why we’re afraid
to destroy them?
This information has been
compiled for On Your Behalf by Consultant Clinical Psychologist
Roger Bailey:-
Chain letters have been around
for years; most of us will have experience of them in some form
or other. They tend to follow a similar pattern, promising good
luck for the compliant and death and destruction for the more independent-minded
who throw them in the bin.
Most of the time they are at worst annoying and at best mildly amusing,
or are they?
Most of the time people feel relatively in control of their lives
and relationships, if something goes wrong we try to fix it by dealing
with the problem. If we are worried about our jobs, we may work
harder, longer or more effectively to prove our worth.
If our children are sick we call a doctor, but what if our attempts
to deal with problems fail repeatedly? If a child dies in a road
accident, a loved one is diagnosed with a terminal illness?
When the world feels beyond your control, when people feel as though
their lives are determined by events, rather than the other way
around?
The more often our attempts to manage the world fail, the less often
we are liable to keep trying. Eventually some people get to the
point where they feel helpless to control their lives. They can
become depressed and frightened. It is at this time they are most
vulnerable to the intimidating chain letter.
It isn’t fun anymore. It is fear; fear that if the instructions
are not followed another child will die, or a love done will suffer
a relapse. Under these circumstances the chain letter stops being
a little piece of trivial fun, and becomes a threat that feels real,
intimidating and sinister.
If you do not believe me, try the following exercise:-
Take a piece of paper and write down the name of somebody you love
very dearly. OK - now write the following. "I hope that (insert
the name) will die a horrible death in an accident". What!
You didn’t do it! You find that offensive?
They are only words on a page, you could they have the power to
make you feel disturbed like that? Because words are powerful, subconsciously
we believe that our wishes and words just might be able to shape
events in the real world, and are not prepared to take the chance.
Now this is especially true in childhood. Younger children believe
that they can be responsible for real-life events because they thought
or wished for them to happen. If parents divorce, children often
feel responsible, and seek a reason their own behaviour or thinking.
Can you imagine the impact on a child if they failed to send on
a chain letter and shortly afterwards their father is killed in
an accident? The sense of responsibility and guilt could last for
years, produce anxiety and depression.
Is that really so trivial?
It is certainly unlikely, but given that within a few short weeks
an e-mail sent on ten times each time it is received, will have
some 6 million copies in circulation. If 1% of those people are
vulnerable, then 6000 people will be hurt!
Is it really worth just sending it on?
If you are too frightened to
delete the e-mail, read on...
Words can be powerful. If you
have received a chain letter that is frightening or intimidating,
you may wish to try the following procedure.
Copy out the text below carefully
on to a plain white sheet of paper, or print this section.
This letter was written by
a Clinical Psychologist in Belfast Northern Ireland, the cognitive
power contained in the words of this letter will bring freedom from
fear, only if the instructions are followed exactly. If you follow
the instructions, no chain letter can harm you or threat befall
you.
"Your words cannot
harm me, your words cannot reach me, your words are broken and without
meaning. My words and thoughts are filled with peace, I have peace
of mind."
Take a copy of these words and place in a plain envelope, seal the
envelope and then secure the seal with your signature and seal again
with sticky tape.
THE ENVELOPE MUST BE SECURELY SEALED.
Place the envelope in a safe place.
Each time you receive a chain
email you must DELETE IT IMMEDIATELY, do not follow the instructions
in the e mail. If you begin reading by accident, stop at once. Count
to 10 and think of the works you sealed in the envelope, and then
delete the e-mail.
EACH TIME YOU DELETE A CHAIN E-MAIL, THE POWER OF WORDS IN THE
SEALED ENVELOPE INCREASES.
If you do not have sticky
tape you can always forward the chain letter e-mails to me Linda
McAuley and I will personally delete them On Your Behalf.
Send to oyb@bbc.co.uk
This information has been
compiled for On Your Behalf by Consultant Clinical Psychologist
Roger Bailey.
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