If You Ask Me
by Roger Courtney

MLA BLUES

In the morning I cut the grass
Or mend some broken fences

In the afternoon there’s the important Job
Of filling in my expenses
I employ my wife and my children
They all have been approved
Then there’s my aunts and my uncles
And cousins twice removed

It has to be better then working
And it keeps the wolves at bay
So as long as I can drag it out
I’m gonna stay an MLA

Week after week,
the routine is the same
Each Monday I issue a press release
Saying the other side’s to blame
It really fills up your day
And I don’t mind admitting

That I don’t know how I fitted it all in
When the Assembly was sitting

As long as we don’t compromise
I’m sure we’ll get our own way
So as long as I’m able
I’m gonna stay an MLA

When I was elected
I was so idealistic

But as I lie here in my hot tub
I see I must be realistic

There’s the holidays and week-end breaks
The summerhouse with its pools
Well if they did give the money to us

They’d waste it on nurses and schools
So although I’m not religious

Every night I pray
That I won't have to work again
And I can stay an MLA

I try not to look out of the window
In the morning's too soon
‘Cos there would be nothing left to do
in the afternoon

Nobody quite understands
The toll that it is taking
So I hope you appreciate
The sacrifices I’m making

So if there is an election
I hope you’ll put you’re vote my way
So I can keep on doing bugger all
And I can stay an MLA

If You Ask Me Archive