Children In Need

Week 5:

So now the end is near. And I'm sure my partner Lou is thrilled! I've taken her to hell, fortunately we're on the way back. I know I have been fairly demanding to deal with but she has never flinched. We're close enough and been through enough now that she can either shout at me or sing my praises. I'd like to say the latter is a regular occurrence but...

My wardrobe is now sorted. My routines almost. The quickstep still needs work. At our weekend preparation session I'll be honest, I was slightly perturbed by the fact that everyone else was there. It did put me off my stride. But I know I'll be in the zone come the night itself. I've been training too hard and enjoying it too much to blow it now. The most important thing is to relax and remember why we're doing it.

There are though some very very good double-acts. Julia Morgan and her partner Andrzej are in a class of their own. But there is a very strong back-up group: Anna B and David, Bob and Sarah, Annabel and her David, even Gadders is making a move on the rails. And then there's Bern, who promises to go all Mark Foster on us. The competition is incredibly tight. But as long as we focus on ourselves, Lou and I will be fine. Fingers, arms, legs and toes crossed.

Week 4:

With less than a fortnight to go, my partner Louise and I are upping the anti. She gives me routines to go away and rehearse, which I need to learn off by heart, plus foot exercises. Apparently I have very good feet. It's just they don't work all that well.

A number of us are training more and more. Rumour and gossip continues apace about how we're all doing. The good news is that there will be fewer couples dancing at the same time which means the night should look less like a night at the dodgems!

Our costumes have now arrived, dancing shoes have been ordered. Spray-tans are being considered, but not by me! And the brightly coloured 80s shirt I thought I was wearing, I am no longer. She who must be obeyed has declared it's a non-starter. We're going to find something simpler!

Week 3:

I had my first 'lose-it' moment this week. Louise's patience is incredible, but mine is often tested to the limit. Realising that we're up against it, Lou has brought in some extra help and it's made a big difference. From my posture, to general balance, even the position of my fingers; all are being scrutinised. I'm feeling parts of body I never knew existed. Yes that's you hips, bum and elbows! The standards are rising everywhere. Even Gadders is confident of his moves on the floor. The only problem is I keep having mental blanks on the steps. I've promised my partner I'll get her to the final, which if I'm honest is a huge promise to make based on how things are going currently. But I'm having the best time and you never know, stranger things have happened.

Week 2:

My odds have worsened... which is a good thing. The fact that tickets at Wicksteed sold out in just 2 hours is a scary thing. Our audience aren't fools; they sense a dramatic dancing disaster when they see one.

My cha-cha-cha has progressed ok, as has the waltz. But I haven't even started the quick-step yet. Whilst I consider myself a rock and roll demon, this is a different ball game altogether. Getting over the prospect of looming humiliation has taken a while. I'd love to do much more training. Just a few hours a week isn't really enough and I envy the BBC1 crowd who have time to develop their routines. Julia Morgan is widely seen here as the hot favourite here....with Anna B, Bob, Bern and Jon R close behind. Look out for Gadders' rather unconventional technique. He promises to entertain.

Week 1:

So now I know what Austin Healey, Mark Foster and Andrew Castle are going through. I've stolen a march on my fellow broadcasting competitors by starting lessons in Kettering this week. I've struck gold with a young, vibrant and creative partner called Louise Jenson. Are we a young, vibrant and creative double act though? Not yet, no. But we're getting there.

I am starting to learn the cha-cha-cha, but it's more cha-cha-'ow that's my foot'...Louise endured an interesting first hour. Not only did I stub her toe and make it bleed (she was wearing heels, it's her own fault) but I also took out two girls eyes when I tried to spin and twist, whilst keeping a flat left arm.

We're 40 seconds through our cha-cha-cha routine...so still another 50 seconds to learn and we haven't even started the waltz or the quick-step! The others won't know what's hit them....