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You ever been asked that question... why do you support a Non League team?

Apart from the superior football says I? Yes, says they (with ridicule writ large).

The friendly banter perhaps, profers I? With a handful of fans says they? (smug Manchester United season ticket waiting list in hand).

Well, for this reason and this reason above all others. You never quite know what's going to happen.

Caroline Barker

In my 20 years of Non League Football (that which I can remember) I've had 7-6 defeats settled in the 10th minute of extra time, I've had standing shoulder to shoulder with the entire attendance in a cowshed while the rain drives sideways, but a game the ref refuses to call off (eight hardy souls, deepest Middlesex, circa 1990 FA Cup qualifier) and then this week, oh this week of heady Non League oddities, we've had a captain sent off - whilst lying prostrate injured.

A former boxer sent off for apparently not taking a penalty correctly, and a referee (perhaps who should've sent himself off) making a gesture involving a magic sponge and an inappropriate use of a physio. (Apologies for anyone not knowing the incidents involved, try any fans forum and I'm sure you'll stumble upon it).

Where else (but perhaps in the pocket of Graham Poll) could you pull such flagrant moments of officiating greatness?

We pay, you see, week in week out for the stuff we expect. our regular seat in the stands (£8 - mine is 6th seat to the right, 3 down from the gentleman who kindly brings a selection of sweets each week) our programme (£2 of quality statistics, the gaffer's notes and adverts for random carpet firms) and then any optional light refreshments.

The rest, including how the man in black may or may not call a game, is all an added extra.

I know we all claim we'd like to see better officials up and down the football pyramid, and I'm a big advocate for that moment when you look at who's running the line and realise you might have once seen them on Match of the Day, but where would  we all be without the post game banter born out of dodgy referee decisions?

"Did that penalty really need to be retaken ref?". "Call that ten yards? Would you like to borrow my yardstick?" and other such flowery conversations, they'd all be a thing of the past.

I say pish and tosh to the strategists behind TV replays and goal-line technology, and all hail the humble non league referee; they are a more human, more robust and more generally willing to act like a fool for our entertainment.

So take that you Premier League watching fans, you wouldn't survive a week with some of our officials...although I'm sure anyone who argues Manchester United always get penalties at home, would like to try!

The Non League Football Show
LIVE Monday from 9pm or LISTEN AGAIN www.bbc.co.uk/nonleague