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You are in: Kent > People > Your Stories > Supermum

Larry Smith

Supermum

After caring for 45 babies and young children over 17 years, as well as having three children of her own, you would think that Larry Smith would be ready to throw the terry towel in. Not so....

Walking up Larry’s street it’s easy to recognise which house is hers as your eyes are drawn to the ceramic figures on the front wall. It’s as if they are saying ‘all children welcome’. How apt because they most definitely are.

Ceramic doll

Larry and her family love to foster. She has taken other people’s children into her home and looked after them for as long as her own children can remember and even before that.

So when you have three children of your own why would you want to look after someone else’s? “Fostering for me personally and for us as a family is the best job in the world and I would never not want to do it. Ever,” says Larry.

“When you see a child that maybe has no social skills and has had a really hard time then you see that same child in a school play or something, and he’s standing up there and he’s performing, and enjoying it – you think ‘I’ve been part of that’ and that’s the buzz.

“Also, when you see a family that you’ve worked with who are then able to progress and carry on with their children – it’s a wonderful thing. It really is a great privilege to do this job.”

The Smith’s can foster up to three children, which means that many times during her career Larry has cared for six children at once. And because of her nursery and childminding background, Larry and her husband Dave, feel they are suited to caring for babies and young children (0-7 years-old). That’s a serious house full of young children, at very demanding ages.

Dave & Larry Smith

Most parents would suggest that it’s difficult bringing up two children under the age of seven, so how does Larry cope with six? Foster carers are extremely well supported. As well has having Dave at home Larry gets help from many different agencies such as social services, health and education.

Another important factor Larry is keen to stress is that she works very closely with the children’s families. “A big part of fostering is actually the contact we have with families. We work sometimes daily with them particularly if the child is very young because to keep that link with their family is very important.”

It’s all very well looking after other people’s children, but isn’t it hard to love them like your own? “It’s not hard at all!” Larry says with a laugh. “We feel very strongly that when children come to live with us we are all one. You open up to let them in and you close around them and when the time comes for them to go you’ve got to open up again and let them go. And then we close up again as a family.”

It all seems so easy when it’s put like that but surely the difficulty must be when it’s time for them to leave. The longest time Larry has had a child for is five years, how does anyone prepare themselves for that inevitable day when you have to let them go?

Larry Smith

“You are trained so you know what you are doing but on the personal side of it – it’s never easy and you never ever get used to it,” explains Larry. “But you know that any child that you’ve moved on – whether it’s gone back to its parents or moved into adoptive placement - a little bit of that child stays with you and a lot of us goes with them. I think knowing there’s so many children out there that need the help, is what keeps you going.”

Although Larry’s own children have been brought up with fostering you can’t help but wonder if it is hard for them to share their parents. “One of the things we’ve always done from the beginning is check with our children, long before a child comes into our home, how they are feeling about everything.

“We as a family have our own set of rules – not rules meaning you can’t do this and you can’t do that - but rules so that we know how we’re all feeling because I think that’s important.

“Also, they have never known any different and I think they are very tolerant and patient. They know there are children out there who are perhaps not as fortunate as they’ve been and they do need a little bit of help, or their families do.

Winnie the Pooh

“We don’t respond to our children any differently than we do the foster children and the other way round. So if there’s an argument going on, we would be as open to listening to both sides as if it were a couple of ours arguing. We feel very strongly that when children come to live with us we are all one.”

It all appears to be so perfect; it’s hard to believe that children from different families and different backgrounds can all live in harmony under one roof. But for the Smith’s this does seem to be the case. I think I’ve found the real life Waltons.

Larry Smith is a foster carer with Kent County Council Fostering Service.

last updated: 18/06/2008 at 10:51
created: 05/09/2006

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