How can we encourage our teens at school without putting them under too much pressure?
Parenting expert Eileen Hayes wrote this article in February 2004. This article was last reviewed by Heather Welford in September 2008.
How can we encourage our teens at school without putting them under too much pressure?
Parenting expert Eileen Hayes wrote this article in February 2004. This article was last reviewed by Heather Welford in September 2008.
Teens are sometimes under a lot of pressure to perform well at school, and this can lead to anxiety and tension.
That's the bad news. The good news is that young people, on the whole, are getting better results year on year.
Year ten (ages 14-15) is seen by many as a watershed. If your teen gets through this year and is still motivated, enthusiastic and working well, she's more than likely to continue doing well.
For others, this is when difficulties and problems emerge.
Some teenagers go off specific subjects; others go off school generally. If your child's struggling, you'll need to know exactly what it is she's struggling with.
If the trouble is with specific subjects, it may be she's fallen out with the teacher, is having difficulties with a part of the curriculum, or is just feeling she just can't do it.
Your teen may need help (if you know the subject, that's great; if you don't, there are lots of books available to help you get up to speed), or simply some encouragement.
If you get on well with your child, talk a lot and still enjoy each other's company, most problems will be relatively easy to overcome.
If, on the other hand, you can't discuss anything contentious without it turning into an argument, you might not be the best person to tackle the problem. Ask for help from someone your child likes and trusts, such as a teacher, relative or neighbour.
This is no time for pride, guilt or torture - the quicker the problem's resolved, the sooner your teenager can get back to her studies and you can stop worrying.
There are three main reasons why children skip school:
It's vital to establish the cause and take steps to resolve it before your teen's future is seriously affected.
Schools have the right to exclude a young person who's been in serious trouble. In most cases this is for a fixed period, such as three or five days.
The school must always phone parents, then follow up with a letter if a child is to be excluded. Letters should also be sent to the local education authority to explain why the school has enforced the exclusion.
Remember these points:
Exclusion from school is obviously very serious. Once a teenager is excluded she's more likely to get into further trouble, and this can be difficult to deal with.
All content within BBC Health is provided for general information only, and should not be treated as a substitute for the medical advice of your own doctor or any other health care professional. The BBC is not responsible or liable for any diagnosis made by a user based on the content of the BBC Health website. The BBC is not liable for the contents of any external internet sites listed, nor does it endorse any commercial product or service mentioned or advised on any of the sites. See our Links Policy for more information. Always consult your own GP if you're in any way concerned about your health.
BBC © 2012 The BBC is not responsible for the content of external sites. Read more.
This page is best viewed in an up-to-date web browser with style sheets (CSS) enabled. While you will be able to view the content of this page in your current browser, you will not be able to get the full visual experience. Please consider upgrading your browser software or enabling style sheets (CSS) if you are able to do so.