O, for a dash of originality. After all, masked-killer movies are well and good, but in an age when audiences demand something more from your average popcorn flick, "Valentine" is definitely not loved-up.
Set, unsurprisingly, around the time of the amourous Saint, "Valentine" sees school buddies Richards, Shelton, Cauffiel, and Capshaw all looking for the perfect man - and instead finding a sicko who sends them murderous love notes and would prefer to stick a knife in them than take them out to dinner.
The only decent guy is Adam (Boreanaz), Shelton's on-off squeeze, who also happens to be a recovering alcoholic.
Let's face it - we all know what's going to happen and director Blanks ("Urban Legend") offers up few surprises. There's the host of red herrings of which none really bite, creative deaths, girls running around screaming and then being incredibly thick, but a distinct lack of gratuitous nudity, which would have at least brightened up the landscape. And Denise Richards - she of the gravity-defying cleavage and zero acting talent - you wish she would get bumped off at the start.
But while it's fine to suspend disbelief, it's still irritating when horror movie heroes decide to "check out that noise" in a deserted building. If you shout hello and nobody answers, it's a baddie! Okay? If you've hidden from the scary killer, don't leave your hiding place after less than a minute! Why do they do that?
Oh - and what an end twist. We really didn't see that coming.