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Another Year buried ...
Dec 24, 2003


H2G2 continues to be the worldwide eclectic collective of argumentative, fiery and, at the very least, quite strange personalities. Make a comment and wait for the flaming to start, assuming you can actually log in and find a page that works.

It used to be good didn't it? Where has all the magic gone? I suppose all good things come to an end.

I'm not leaving H2G2. You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave. I'm just gonna give it a rest for a while. If you need to get hold of me then leave a message after the bleep ...

(1 reply, Latest reply: Dec 24, 2003)

Silk Boxers
Nov 14, 2003


Day 8 and it's starting to get better. The first thing I noticed was intense itching at three in the morning ... so I scratched!

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!

That's when it got really sore. Sort of snuck up on me when I was asleep and caught me unawares. Ok this is time for phase two drugs. It's time for the Calamine lotion. A word of warning though, don't drink it! It also sets like concrete after having very little effect.

We're due to see Find Nemo at the Cinema and I've had it with the plastic sheeting. It gets stuck to you skin and pulls so not really that effective if you want to move at all. Then it gets very sweaty.

Solution number two in things to wear ... Silk Boxer Shorts. Black of course. The waistband was a bit of a problem so wore them a bit high (just call me squeaky), but they did the trick slightly better than the plastic ... which is nice.

After all this is over, I shall have to invest in a silk bodysuit just in case.

(15 replies, Latest reply: Nov 26, 2003)

Plastic Bags
Nov 10, 2003


Ok, day 6 of Shingles is starting to loose it's novelty value. My lower stomach, hip and bum on my left hand side look like a turkey basted in salad cream which in turn has had a blow torch blasted over it. You know how paint blisters when you put those paint stippers on it, well it's a bit like that, but red. Sore? Imagine that someone gently scrapes your skin with a nutmeg grater. That's what a T shirt feels like. That, the ache and occasional stabbing pain. (Please leave sympathy after the bleep)



AHA! Ever the scientific mind at work. When you examine any woven material closely enough it will appear rough. What I needed was something smoother than a fifty year old Scottish malt whiskey rather than fabric to cover the skin. Yes, the very thing. I cut the plastic bag in half creating a single sheet of plastic, wrapped it around my affected parts and then put clothes on. Ok I rustle ... a lot ... but at least the nutmeg grater has quit. I can now look forward to walking about and sweating.

Hoorah for science. Asda, here we come.

(4 replies, Latest reply: Nov 11, 2003)

Sick as a dawg
Nov 6, 2003


I have been diagnosed with Shingles . Very sore. Just goes to show that tidying up can cause some serious deseases. However, life goes on and I get two weeks off work ... which is nice.

On a lighter note, there are many buzzwords in today's business world. However, many people often ask for a simple explanation of their meaning. Here's some definitions that most men will understand:

1) You're at a party and a beautiful woman walks up to you and says, "I'm fantastic in bed." - That's Direct Marketing.

2) You're at a party with a bunch of friends and a beautiful woman walks up to you and points to an equally beautiful friend of hers and says, "She's fantastic in bed." - That's Advertising.

3) At a party you give a beautiful woman your telephone number. The next day she calls and says, "Hi, I'm fantastic in bed." - That's Telemarketing.

4) You're at a party and a beautiful woman walks over to you and says, "May I," and reaches up to straighten your tie, lightly brushing her breast against your arm, and then says, "By the way, I'm fantastic in bed." - That's Public Relations.

5) You're at a party and see a beautiful woman. You walk over to her and say, "I hear you're fantastic in bed." - That's Brand Recognition.

6) You're at a party and see a beautiful woman. You talk her into going home with your friend. - That's a Marketing Representative.

7) Your friend can't satisfy her so she calls you. - That's Tech Support.

8) You're on your way to a party when you realize that there are beautiful women everywhere. So you start shouting at the top of your lungs, "I'm fantastic in bed!" - That's Spam.

(4 replies, Latest reply: Nov 7, 2003)

It's all downhill from here
Oct 1, 2003


So you think that you're a bit sad then? You've maybe got a collection of model cars, you play Dungeons and Dragons or perhaps you like skipping or something.

Think again.

Not only do some people collect dull things, but they make web sites out of them.

http://www.pencils.com/

... they are not alone ...

http://www.infofreako.com/jad/enpitsu-e.html

but the coup de gras is ...

http://www.pencilpages.com/

... which boasts a gallery and philosophy pages The list is endless. Pages and pages of ...

http://www.the-pencil-place.freeserve.co.uk/pen_phys.htm
http://dir.yahoo.com/Recreation/Hobbies/Collecting/Pencil_Sharpeners/
http://www.pencilcollector.org/membership.htm

... and then there are the pencil sharpener collectors.

http://www.keyworlds.com/c/collecting-pencil_sharpeners.htm

It doesn't stop there. There are other things that people should be ashamed of doing, but instead they build web sites. Things such as International Cup Stacking ...

http://www.speedstacks.com/
http://www.worldcupstackingassociation.org/
http://www.cr.k12.ia.us/trum/Murray/cup_stacking.htm
http://mr-jim.com/cupstacking.htm

... and the movies that go with them.

Make it stop. Make it stop!!

(11 replies, Latest reply: Nov 7, 2003)