| |  | | Greetings Earthlings | |
Stranded on earth several millenia ago due to a malfunctioning chronsomnambuliser, I have been waiting for delivery of spare parts and hygenic paper towels from my native Betelgeuse.
These I expect to arrive any century now, so my time with you all is limited and the opportunity to share my amazing knowledge and perceptions should be utilized by all monkeymen - sorry, humans - with appropriate celerity.
My actual name is creneloid xplfrrtyblartshmoot, but you may call me rascal.
My wisdom covers such subjects as the ocean and how to move around in it for long periods of time without drowning (that would be scuba diving monkeybrain), Asian cultures, food and beverage, as well as a variety of primitive social conventions practiced by your under-developed planet's inhabitants.
Due to many centuries of suffering utter boredom, I welcome any and all corespondences and may even reply to those I find amusing or vaguely intelligent.
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Last posted: May 31, 2001
