Check out our Field Researchers Call to Arms. This is an advert run on intergalactic satellite to advertise the Guide, sadly this was never transmitted on Earth.

	Amelia B

It's good enough name for now. It suits my purpose. Same as the body. It wouldn't have been my first choice, but it's not bad. I love my work. I am going to carve this little planet into tiny acid-sharp pieces, and once I've done that I'll move onto the next planet and so on and so forth, until I get the job of local editor myself. From then on it's all a case of politics not field-researching. Let me tell you, I'll be running this whole publishing empire within a hundred years. You see if I'm not.

Whatever the field, I am an expert. If it's good taste you're after, then look no further. I think the unthinkable and say the unsayable. I'm the person you visit when you want hard, real sense. My astonishingly appropriate cover of international reporter might seem like a rare example of the h2g2 editors getting things right for once. Not so. My original job was as a fish-gutter in a factory in Minsk. Within a week I had taken over the company, floated it on the Russian stock exchange, sold my stake, bought a dacha, thrown a party, taken a job with Reuters and been promoted to Paris. I have only one special subject - the world and all it contains.

Early reports from Earth:

I am not amused.

Have your excuses ready

You are going to suffer, Ford

Forget everything we said about Paris.

A gift

Don't let him loose on the fish.