|  Posted Jul 4, 2001 by Master Cricetus http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A587513
Personally, I find this article good for two reasons: first, it is informative of a subject that will be interesting to many people (specifically, Bealtes fans) and, secondly, it is entertaining to read. It is not too long, but briefly summarizes the topic, and has a bit of commentary without being pushy.
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 Posted Jul 4, 2001 by cafram - in the states. A great entry, imo, although a few changes could be made...I have an aversion to punctuation in titles, but that's just a personal preference, I do know, however, that you should use single quote marks (') and not doubles ("), although 'Yellow Submarine' should be italicised instead.
I'm not sure whether this is a feature of the Editied Guide or not, but I was always taught not to put a comma before an 'and'...hopefully someone else can verify this
Spelling mistakes (there could well be more...these were just the really obvious ones...) (or possible no) => possibly Bealtes (last paragraph) =>
Overall though, an enjoyable entry...and guess which song I've got stuck in my head now?!
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 Posted Aug 5, 2001 by Catwoman Hello. Even though it appears (from his/her/your personal space) Master Cricetus has gone awol I'll make a few comments on the entry, just in case.
Firstly, it's good to see the entry - the guide certainly needs to know about the fantastic film that is the Yellow Submarine. IMHO there are a few changes that are required to make this into a good entry, rather than just a worthy entry.
1. Make it longer. Add some details about the plot (such as it is), the involvement of John, Paul, George and Ringo (ie, only the songs and the end titles bit), who made the film, which Beatles LPs the songs come from, etc.
2. Spruce up the text a bit. Separate the text into paragraphs, using something like Credits, Songs, Story Plot as headers, use bold and italics to make the lyrics and song titles stand out a bit, etc.
Also, I don't know which is your (Master Cricetus') country of residence, but here in the UK the film has been shown countless times on TV - it used to be a bank holiday favourite (along with the Bond films) but these days is relegated to late night Channel 4 showings. I'm sure that vast numbers of people in this country have seen it.
And I'm not sure that the film can really be described as 'legendary' - this implies the film may or may not exist, and my video collection definitly says it does.
Anyway, take what you will from above and discard the rest.
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 Posted Aug 5, 2001 by Monsignore Pizzafunghi Bosselese And after all, this is rather a case for the h2g2 Update HQ. There's an Edited Entry 'Yellow Submarine' at http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A295562
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 Posted Aug 6, 2001 by Catwoman You know, I was going to check whether there already exists a Yellow Submarine ... but didn't. Ah, well. That'll teach me.
Thanks, Bossel, for pointing that out.
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 Posted Sep 1, 2001 by Swiv (decrepit postgrad) so, if Master Cricetus is absent, can we take this over to the update centre without him? I like both entries
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 Posted Sep 1, 2001 by Monsignore Pizzafunghi Bosselese Yepp, it's on its way...
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 Posted Sep 3, 2001 by BBC auto-messages Editorial Note: This conversation has been moved from 'Peer Review' to 'Update Headquarters'.
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 Posted Sep 29, 2001 by Bluebottle My view is that this article should be allowed to be an approved article on it's own, regardless of the existence of the other Yellow Submarine article. The one I wrote was intended to be an overview of everything Yellow Submarine related, and was originally divided into 4 sections, the song, the film, the first album and the second album. The edited version removed the header saying "The Song" from the beginning of the article, as Engels believed that having a header as the first part of the article, beneath the article's title, looked silly, but you can see it exists in the unedited version: http://www.bbc.co.uk/h2g2/guide/A253612 Master Cricetus' article is indeed excellent, and should be part of the guide, but concentrates almost entirely on the film, with a brief mention of the soundtrack in relation to the film. It therefore covers only 1/4 of the approved article, but in greater depth, and in enough depth to, in my opinion, warrant it being allowed to be an approved article in it's own right. Afterall, just because there is an approved article on Antarctica doesn't mean that the articles on "McMurdo Station, Antarctica" and "Training for the Antarctic - a Personal Perspective" have to become merged with it, as they deal in detail with a specific part of Antarctica, as the film "Yellow Submarine" deals is only one area of everything "Yellow Submarine" related. In my view, merging the articles would be a mistake. The options are either to cut/paste Master Cricetus' article under the "The Film" header, and have it in many ways repeat what has already been said, or more likely, splice Master Cricetus' article in to replace the text I have already written. Personally I don't feel that this would work too well, as the style Master Cricetus' article contrasts completely with the rest of my article. (By this, I am NOT saying that I dislike Master Cricetus' article, I think that as a first article, it is excellent, better than my first attempt, and should be preserved. I like reading both Homer and Douglas Adams, but I feel any attempts to merge their work would be a complete failure).
I also feel that it is the wrong message to bring to a first-time writer on H2G2. Master Cricetus tried hard to write something, and did a good job, and was then told that his article wasn't wanted as it's a repeat, and his work would be chopped up into peices and inserted into someone else's article. And then people wonder why he hasn't been seen since. It doesn't give a good first impression for H2G2. I feel that the first article someone writes should be treated with a lot more respect and encouragement, afterall, it is hard to know what to write. The first articles I wrote I wasn't sure how to, which is why I'm re-writing them all now. But I was encouraged to try, and because of that encouragement I now have almost 50 approved articles. If someone had done what is happening to Master Cricetus, and said "Good article, I'm going to chop it to bits", I would not have stayed on H2G2.
I actively support the H2G2 Update Centre, I think it is a very good idea, and I am using it to update articles I feel should be updated, many of which are articles I wrote which I feel I could improve on. But I don't think that this article needs the update centre, and is strong enough to stand alone.
<BB<
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