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by
MicheBella

Throughout my career, I have always gravitated to the newest technologies. When everyone around me was happily ensconced at our typesetting shop with their front-end machines, thinking nothing would ever change, there I was, insisting on working with this small box in the corner. Late at night, when all the other work was done, I'd be there, trying to make sense of Illustrator 88, and its odd lines and functions.

I didn't know why. I didn't know what compelled me to be there. I only knew that this Macintosh II machine was important for me to learn. And so I did. And my life has not been without a Macintosh in it, since those lonely days in 1989. Indeed, my career has been built around knowing it, and knowing it well.

Those people who fervently clung to their knowledge of the front-end typesetting systems found themselves without jobs, btw. I sometimes like to fancy that they later became HTML coders. But some people just don't want to learn anything new, much less embrace something they don't understand, and don't understand why it's important in their lives.

I don't know why I did. What was it about this little box, with a completely new interface, that pushed me to study its every command? Certainly I didn't see then the massive changes it would effect in my life. In that case, ultimately, it was that more and more customers were demanding jobs be produced through this box, and no one else wanted to learn it.

And I have always been like that. Jumping on new software and operating systems, when people were content to stick with the old one. Learning things like video editing, that had no real relevance to my current job.

Always, through this whole technological revolution, that saw the end of typesetting as we know it, I've been concurrently exploring the online world. Since my first AOL account (and CompuServe) in 1992, I've been talking to Japan and Germany and South America and Australia in chat rooms and forums online.

Many people, again, those stuck in what is familiar, have chastized me for my "wasted" hours online. Though I have spent many hours online, going without sleep and food sometimes, I don't consider even one hour wasted. Many of my current best friends are people I met online. It's no understatement to say that my life changed in big ways due to meeting those people.

And further, I have always believed, in a spiritual sense, that those we meet online are people who are meant to come into our lives. I have always believed that about one-on-one connections, but the online world makes it even easier. How else would you become friends with someone in Australia or England or South America if you are in Los Angeles, for example? Not easily. Not without a lot of travel, usually.

Don't you think we have important things to say to each other? That maybe the travel keeps us from?

Luckily, now we have Second Life. (http://www.secondlife.com... )
(I'm MicheBella Mandelbrot.)

Many people already scoff at my "Second Life addiction". Believe me when I tell you that I absolutely, without question, believe that Second Life is going to be more important to my life than the Macintosh was. That it is just as vital that I sit there and learn all its facets right now.

Countless people scoff at this "online game." Don't at all understand what the bloody point is. Shake their head and look at me sadly, as I once again get on Second Life. Even say: I've done the online thing. I'm over it.

There are those of us here (Adam Curry, Eric Rice, etc.) who "get" it. Who get on Second Life and can visualize what this could become, and so desperately need to be a part of that evolution. Let me tell you that, for me, it is a deeply spiritual transformation. Not in the sense that Second Life is my new religion, though that's certainly true too.

No, but mostly this: we are currently living in darkness. Caught up in greed and corporate malfeasance all around us. Deceit and double-dealing. Yet slog to work every day to earn barely enough to get us by. What is the point?

Before Second Life, I knew these things.

I am creative, yet I'm unable to live creatively.
I have a great imagination, yet I rarely use it.
I intuitively connect with others, yet the social rules of LA often keep me from that.
I dream big dreams, yet live a simple life.
If I died tomorrow, there would have been many things I haven't accomplished.
There are deep places in my soul I never touch.
I rarely get to communicate my depth to others.
I don't have sex enough, though I'm a very sexual person.
I had believed there is no way to explore the fullness of myself. And the fullness of others.

Well, it's a tired analogy, but I'll use it anyway. Walking into Second Life, every time, to me is like Dorothy opening that door in Oz. It's much too facile to say that it's just about the pretty pictures. The heart of Second Life is when you connect with others. When it's late at night, and I'm just standing somewhere in the world, it doesn't have the same magic and depth, as when I'm connecting with someone, anyone who crosses my path.

And that's another thing. We are all in our First Life, so insulated from each other. We keep ourselves sheltered, and don't talk to strangers. Unless they have been pre-approved, and get to pass through our carefully regulated filters.

I used to marvel at children, who have no compunction or fear (until it's bred into them) about going up to a new child and just saying hi. Engaging, interacting, finding out what that other being is about. When was the last time you did that as an adult? Just walked up to someone, who has no "purpose" in your life. Someone you don't know, who wasn't a friend of someone, or a coworker, or someone who has some other entree into your life--and just said HI! For no reason?

Hi. I'm a human being. And so are you. What are YOU about?

And that, in essence, is what Second Life is to me.

I have friends who argue that "online people aren't real people." I deeply and passionately disagree. But until you figure it out, I'll be hanging at Adam Curry's music palace, or Eric Rice's multiverse media center, or just having sex with my new crystal clitoris in Second Life.

Come on down, it's great in here. It's changing my life.